The new girl.......

[Cadanance00]

Okay, so I broke up with my gf like months ago. The he dumped her and now we're friends again, though without all the bf gf stuff. She suggested I date her friend Cissy (yeh I fucked up and used her real name already but WTH now). She said Cissy's been wanting me to ask her out but is too shy to ask me. Now, I've met Cissy a number of times but didn't hang with her. I always liked her but my gf was always around.

So now there's no reason not to text Cissy since L gave me her number. And I want to. So what's stopping me? IDK. I borrow my sisters phone & put in the number &......can't do it. Cissy knows all about me and thru my ex's sister everything I did wrong. So why can't I? I feel like a 13 y/o calling a girl for the first time.

[Uniquemind]

Dunno maybe your intimidated? Maybe you fear the relationship will go south and it'll hurt your relations with your sister.

[Meron]

You shouldn't care about your ex since she dumped you for another guy before. Make her jealous, give that bitch a taste of her own medicine.

[Just JT]

So Kayden what do you feel you wana do? I mean, yeah, it's a tough choice, but what's your first instinct?

[Uniquemind]

You shouldn't care about your ex since she dumped you for another guy before. Make her jealous, give that bitch a taste of her own medicine.

I advise against this. Revenge game is petty and immature.

However do what is best for your own self-preservation.

[ClaraWho]

You shouldn't care about your ex since she dumped you for another guy before. Make her jealous, give that bitch a taste of her own medicine.

This is extremely childish and inconsiderate of Cissy. Why the aggression? :/

---

Maybe you've finally realised that everyone advising you is right, that you aren't mature and ready enough to be getting into any relationships. What number of post are we on where you discuss your 'options for dating', without actually having a romantic connection with any of the girls?

Take some time to sort yourself out, to grow up and learn to be happy on your own without relying on others to supply it artificially.

~ Clara

[Cadanance00]

This is extremely childish and inconsiderate of Cissy. Why the aggression? :/

---

Maybe you've finally realised that everyone advising you is right, that you aren't mature and ready enough to be getting into any relationships. What number of post are we on where you discuss your 'options for dating', without actually having a romantic connection with any of the girls?

Take some time to sort yourself out, to grow up and learn to be happy on your own without relying on others to supply it artificially.

~ Clara

I don't see why I'm being aggressive or inconsiderate of Cissy.

The rest of your reply pissed me off at first, but of course truth hurts.

That's a problem. It's called insecurity. I'm always looking to fit in but not quite succeeding, trying to find out what is normal, and looking for approval from people I want to approve of me. I know that much about myself.

L, my ex, is more like a bff than an ex. Maybe it was a mistake to date her in the first place. Cissy is also her friend, so that complicates things a little, too.

[Uniquemind]

This is extremely childish and inconsiderate of Cissy. Why the aggression? :/

---

Maybe you've finally realised that everyone advising you is right, that you aren't mature and ready enough to be getting into any relationships. What number of post are we on where you discuss your 'options for dating', without actually having a romantic connection with any of the girls?

Take some time to sort yourself out, to grow up and learn to be happy on your own without relying on others to supply it artificially.

~ Clara

Wait I'm not following. How is it inconsiderate of Cissy? Cissy is the girl harboring a crush on Kayden here right? So how is she at fault for being shy?

[ClaraWho]

Wait I'm not following. How is it inconsiderate of Cissy? Cissy is the girl harboring a crush on Kayden here right? So how is she at fault for being shy?

I don't see why I'm being aggressive or inconsiderate of Cissy.

The rest of your reply pissed me off at first, but of course truth hurts.

That's a problem. It's called insecurity. I'm always looking to fit in but not quite succeeding, trying to find out what is normal, and looking for approval from people I want to approve of me. I know that much about myself.

L, my ex, is more like a bff than an ex. Maybe it was a mistake to date her in the first place. Cissy is also her friend, so that complicates things a little, too.

*knocks both your heads together* -..- hmph.

I even put a '---' to seperate my response to the message I quoted from my reply...

I was saying that other poster (Meron - reminds me of the postman in Jingle All the Way) who suggested you 'use' Cissy to 'get back' at your/his ex was making an inconsiderate and childish suggestion. His post seemed to contain a lot of personal resentment and aggression.

---

Some call it insecurity. Some call it not keeping it in your pants. I don't really see the link between wanting to fit in, and just wanting to have a friend who you have casual sex with. But given your even recent history don't you think taking a step back from sex and dating, focussing on finding your real self and what you want in life, might be the best option right now?

Get yourself into a more confident, mature place and future relationships will be more meaningful (can read as less problems). I know you tend to look up to your sister, but this would make for a much better role model than the example you've been setting for her.

~ Clara

N.B. I like to think I'm fair with my harshness :rolleyes: