Weird looks from my dad

[Katie NYC]

Well not weird as if they're a mystery. But weird as in inappropriate. He looks at me with lust. I can just tell. He's never touched me and he's a great dad but the looks are there. More so in the last year or so since I've started to fill out. Not sure what to do about it and the problem is, it doesn't really bother me. I'm an exhibitionist. It like being looked at. But I know he shouldn't be looking. I don't want to say anything to my mom who hasn't noticed btw. I don't know.

[BrokenWingedPegasus]

Well not weird as if they're a mystery. But weird as in inappropriate. He looks at me with lust. I can just tell. He's never touched me and he's a great dad but the looks are there. More so in the last year or so since I've started to fill out. Not sure what to do about it and the problem is, it doesn't really bother me. I'm an exhibitionist. It like being looked at. But I know he shouldn't be looking. I don't want to say anything to my mom who hasn't noticed btw. I don't know.
I don't know, maybe try to avoid him if he gets too close for example, especially if he gives you those looks when you're doing something. And if the looks turn into inappropriate behaviors, then you should to talk to someone close.

[Katie NYC]

Not that I'm blaming myself, but I do sometimes walk around the house in very little. I don't think he knows that I know he's been sneaking peaks, and I really don't think he'll ever touch me inappropriately or even wants to. The part that bothers me is that it doesn't bother me and I know it should.

Btw, I'm new here and should probably disclose the fact that I'm a total weirdo.

[Zachary G]

If it makes you uncomfortable when he does that, next time you catch him doing it, just say STOP loud enough for him to hear you and see if that gets his attention -- at least then he will know you are aware of him looking at you.

[Cadanance00]

I don't think that's as unusual as it seems. Men are men and you're an attractive young woman (I think) so it's natural for them to check you out. Just staring holes in you is another matter. It's rude and makes people uncomfortable.

You say you're an exhibitionist. That's okay, i think, in appropriate times, like skinny dipping in a pool with friends or with someone you're intimate with but just to be seen by your dad in skimpy outfits probably isn't fair to him and his staring isn't fair to you.

When my family went skinny dipping my dad said it's okay to look but don't stare. You might tell him something like that.

What would happen if you said something to him like, 'it's okay to look but don't stare holes in me'? Or "I like it that you think I'm attractive but it makes me uncomfortable when you stare."

[Katie NYC]

I feel like if I told him he would be totally mortified and wouldn't be able to look at me at all. My dad is kinda meek. No confidence and my mom treats him like crap. I know this is totally messed up but I kinda feel like I'm giving him a little treat by letting him look. God that's awful.

[Cadanance00]

I think you're discounting him very heavily. And I don't think you're doing him any favor by letting him stare at you. Getting it out in the open might be the best thing you can do.

You might couch it in terms that you like it that he thinks you're attractive and he's welcome to look at you but you get selfconcious when you think he's staring.

[Katie NYC]

I think you're discounting him very heavily. And I don't think you're doing him any favor by letting him stare at you. Getting it out in the open might be the best thing you can do.

You might couch it in terms that you like it that he thinks you're attractive and he's welcome to look at you but you get selfconcious when you think he's staring.

You're probably right. I shouldn't like it like I do anyway. Best to put a stop to it now before it gets weirder.

[Uranus]

If it's gets to the point where you're very uncomfortable....tell him to stop it and that you will tell your mom. You don't necessarily have to tell her, but it should scare him enough to instead focus on someone he know will likely give him some action that night

[ClaraWho]

So just to give a clear picture in the day you've been on vteen.

You lost your virginity at 12 with both girls and boys, the same age but they lost theirs' before turning 12.

You have your tongue, naval and whatever else pierced at the age of 15.

Teachers and your dad both stare at you with 'lust'.

Hm. Now we have a clear overview.

----

Yes, it is really abnormal you get off on the fact your dad is a pervert towards you.

~ Clara

[Katie NYC]

So just to give a clear picture in the day you've been on vteen.

You lost your virginity at 12 with both girls and boys, the same age but they lost theirs' before turning 12.

You have your tongue, naval and whatever else pierced at the age of 15.

Teachers and your dad both stare at you with 'lust'.

Hm. Now we have a clear overview.

----

Yes, it is really abnormal you get off on the fact your dad is a pervert towards you.

~ Clara
Judge much?

[Cadanance00]

Yes, it is really abnormal you get off on the fact your dad is a pervert towards you.

~ Clara

Dear Clara, (no, this isn't sarcastic)

You don't see a lot of "normals" on VT, the homecoming queens, the valedictorians, the captains of the football team, etc. We're all unusual in some way and trying to work out things we don't understand (sometimes by helping others, as you do). Who we find are the worried, scared, insecure, abused, and people sometimes making things up to get attention.

Not to say you're wrong in pointing out some rather extreme claims. We're not getting a very clear picture of what's going on. There are some major contradictions her but sometimes it's good just to let somebody talk.

Hope I didn't piss you off but I just wanted to say something.

[ClaraWho]

Judge much?

You stated you felt weird that you didn't mind him staring at you with lust - I agreed with you. If you can point out where I misquoted your own words I'll happily retract. Or did you just want people to say it was normal? Not my fault you don't like your own answer.

Everyone judges everyone, it's impossible not to. You asked the question.

On a side note, as you say he is downtrodden by your mother, could you be associating his gaze with taking her place? That's a popular trope in those circles.

~ Clara

[Katie NYC]

You stated you felt weird that you didn't mind him staring at you with lust - I agreed with you. If you can point out where I misquoted your own words I'll happily retract. Or did you just want people to say it was normal? Not my fault you don't like your own answer.

Everyone judges everyone, it's impossible not to. You asked the question.

On a side note, as you say he is downtrodden by your mother, could you be associating his gaze with taking her place? That's a popular trope in those circles.

~ Clara
Sorry. You're right.

On the side note, maybe. I know he can't stand my mother and I'm sure he's not the least bit attracted to her any more. It's a screwed up family but it's mine, I guess.

[JessiF]

Hi there
was reading your post and decided to respond to it personally. Firstly there is nothing weird or wrong with enjoying the attention you get from your dad. All men cannot help themselves when looking at a young attractive girl , and it makes no difference if its family or not. Dont feel bad about it , and yes you might be making his day with these little peeks. As long as there is no touching I see no problem with it. I have a uncle who I know is attracted to me in ways he shouldnt be , I like the attention and I often put on a little show for him. It makes me super horny to know I have that affect on him and I cant help but think about him when I touch myself. It feels good and as long as Im not actually doing anything with him , I dont feel like I am hurting anyone. Its good to have fantasies and I know my uncle also appreciates the peeks I give every now and then too.

Jessi

[Uniquemind]

I wonder if males from other primate species have the same attraction-incest social-psych problem.

[Derek951]

So you feel it should bother you more than it does? At least that's kind of what I'm getting. It seems like you're smart and observant enough to realize what's going on with your family. Not sure I would not what advice to give, except it sounds like you know you don't want anything to go above/beyond the way it is now.

[Microcosm]

While I don't think being an exhibitionist is good, I think that as a father he should absolutely not be doing that. It's not right.

Of course, I haven't actually seen the looks so it's hard for me to effectively judge them.

I also don't think it's wrong to judge someone who gets off to their dad's lust. It's important to judge people at times so that we can determine whether something is wrong and how we can help them out.

[pconnor2001]

Seems like there is quite a "reach" here. Your father looks at you funny and you say its lust.

Hope you are wrong.