How important are looks in a relationship?

[Croconaw]

I am most certainly not the most attractive person in the world. Hell, no one is. When I was online looking for a relationship, someone talked to me for about an hour. We had pretty much the same interests. Then, they asked me for a picture of myself. They said "Um, never mind. You're ugly." I was sort of offended.

Next one...
Someone asked me for a picture. It was the very first thing they wanted. Seriously, it was like they only cared about your appearance! They said, "You look like a boy." I don't need people to be so fucking judgmental. I can't say how many times I had people ask me if I was a boy. Some don't even ask. They just assume I am a boy. Someone said Rosie O'Donnell was better looking than me, and I didn't take that well at all. I was basically pissed off, but it doesn't bother me that much now.

That brings me to my question. How important are looks in a relationship? Why are people so judgmental? It's so hard to find someone who doesn't care about looks. If I'm talking to someone for one minute and the first word out of their text bubble is "Picture?" Yep, I'm leaving. Apparently, you only care if I'm hot, you shallow fucker.

I'm sorry if this offends anyone, but I feel like all people care about are looks. What good is a nice personality if no one will date you because you're ugly? I had a girlfriend. She was a fucking bitch, but it doesn't matter. She didn't care about looks, but her personality sucks. That just ruins the fact she doesn't care what you look like.

I feel like this is a big problem with society and why people catfish. People are embarrassed of what they look like because society is so shallow and judgmental. They take a picture of someone they think is hot, and talk to others using their personality. Yet, the other person falls for the picture, and not the personality. Then, the other person gets mad that the catfish lied about their picture. Well, they wouldn't have to lie if society was accepting of unattractive people. I'm not grouping everyone as a whole, but seriously, 90% of the world only wants to date hot people. This happens so often. I've lost faith in society.

Does anyone have any thoughts? I really had to put this out there, and I needed to vent.

[FuTo]

Girl looks are like 2/10 of a relationship. I mean yea when you first fall for someone it's because you found them attractive but everyone has different "tastes" you can be "ugly" to some but "beautiful" to others. Trust me I fell for this guy whos looks werent great but it was because he was a very nice and charming guy. And I think everyone is curious as who the person they talk to looks like. I myself like to know a face to the name I'm talking to not because I want to judge but because I just like to connect the name to a face you know what I mean? sorry if I worded that weird.

[Cadanance00]

Unfortunately I think looks are very important. It seems to be human nature.

I've noticed that good looking students get better grades for equivalent or poorer work than unattractive students. Good looking people get treated better generally, I think, that leads to higher self-esteem and that plus the way they are treated lets them do better in life generally.

Let's face it, some people are downright ugly. (not their fault, of course). Some are fat, some are gawky looking. People are embarrassed to have them around and want to get rid of them. It's human nature, and human nature sometimes sucks.

I don't have anything to refer to, but I believe that people select their partners mostly on the basis of looks unless they know someone very well and select them when they otherwise wouldn't.

I know this is going to be an unpopular opinion.......so have at it!

[FuTo]

Unfortunately I think looks are very important. It seems to be human nature.

I've noticed that good looking students get better grades for equivalent or poorer work than unattractive students. Good looking people get treated better generally, I think, that leads to higher self-esteem and that plus the way they are treated lets them do better in life generally.

Let's face it, some people are downright ugly. (not their fault, of course). Some are fat, some are gawky looking. People are embarrassed to have them around and want to get rid of them. It's human nature, and human nature sometimes sucks.

Umm I'm not sure what school you come from but I have never seen a student getting better grades than another just because they look better. And yea in our society people judge you mostly on your looks but then again looks barely matters once you get to know the person.

[Cadanance00]

Umm I'm not sure what school you come from but I have never seen a student getting better grades than another just because they look better. And yea in our society people judge you mostly on your looks but then again looks barely matters once you get to know the person.

I agree that looks barely matter if you know the person well, but I think people select the people they are going to pursue based largely on looks.

I've seen it happen in our school. About the grades, I mean.

[FuTo]

I agree that looks barely matter if you know the person well, but I think people select the people they are going to pursue based largely on looks.

I've seen it happen in our school. About the grades, I mean.

True...I for one am guilty of that haha. But the guys I like my friends don't and the guys they like I don't and it all comes back down to who is attractive in YOUR eyes and whos not.

[Typhlosion]

I mean, some physical attraction is necessary...

That said, it's far from a priority if I'm thinking about relationships. The most important part is their personality, smarts can be learned and looks fade away in time. It was only during my relationship that I became so much more attracted to my girlfriend. I didn't even think of her looks before.

Even better, at least people that are so shallow to dismiss you weren't worth investing in, anyways.

Good luck to you :)

[indoxyl]

Looks are fairly important to me.

In my years of being on dating sites/apps I don't talk to a guy if I am not physically attracted to him. He might have the greatest personality ever, but if I do not think he's good looking, i don't waste my time.

But just because I dont think they're attractive doesn't mean someone else won't find them attractive.

[FuTo]

Looks are fairly important to me.

In my years of being on dating sites/apps I don't talk to a guy if I am not physically attracted to him. He might have the greatest personality ever, but if I do not think he's good looking, i don't waste my time.

But just because I dont think they're attractive doesn't mean someone else won't find them attractive.

Preeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaach and my gay side is making me say that you're pretty lol