Matryoshkasystem
May 19th, 2016, 09:53 PM
Okay, well some of this has stopped. Not all, but everything with my sis has.
I've been called,well not literally but implied, except for some- attention whore, narcisstic, over emotional, oversensitive, weak-only implied, abusive verbally-when I usually am extremely dissociative-, and some other stuff by my mom. She also threatens to throatpuch or choke me out whenever I disagree with her, forces me to dress like she wants me too which drives people away-(...well not force quite like normal more like passive aggressively intimidate), I HAVE to be around my dad or her at all times if not at school or home. Rarely get actual new clothes, and when I do get new clothes is when I can't even put them on anymore without them feeling like I might lose a part of my body, or they are damaged beyond repair. I also seem to be her main target when she's angry-not physically but verbally-. She LOVES to guilt trip me either into apologizing-for example as a child I said she her and dad were sorta heavy...yeah...learned NEVER to do that again-, changing my plans-like taking in my lil sis since she's borderline autistic when I become an adult-, cause me to change how I view something-like my identity to more match hers-,etc. She also shows me no love-like I only hear the word love from her don't feel it's, she shows the dogs more love-and she threatens them a lot-.
My lil sis threw stuff at me for fun-she smiled and laughed for like a year until I told my parents-which she was only greeted with a verbal warning-(yet let me do it and I probably would've lost a limb it seems like). Other than that the others were only once when they happened.
My dad would when I was little would ground me for moths on end for an f-was only like 5-9-, take stuff away permanently. Is just very cold... other that that I can't rember him doing much.
The only reason I am asking is due to the fact my mind and personality has pretty much started to split into multiple.
Note:0-3 I went through four major surgeries with no pain killer-was knocked out but nothing to numb pain and was constantly sick, so this could be the base for the splitting.
I've been called,well not literally but implied, except for some- attention whore, narcisstic, over emotional, oversensitive, weak-only implied, abusive verbally-when I usually am extremely dissociative-, and some other stuff by my mom. She also threatens to throatpuch or choke me out whenever I disagree with her, forces me to dress like she wants me too which drives people away-(...well not force quite like normal more like passive aggressively intimidate), I HAVE to be around my dad or her at all times if not at school or home. Rarely get actual new clothes, and when I do get new clothes is when I can't even put them on anymore without them feeling like I might lose a part of my body, or they are damaged beyond repair. I also seem to be her main target when she's angry-not physically but verbally-. She LOVES to guilt trip me either into apologizing-for example as a child I said she her and dad were sorta heavy...yeah...learned NEVER to do that again-, changing my plans-like taking in my lil sis since she's borderline autistic when I become an adult-, cause me to change how I view something-like my identity to more match hers-,etc. She also shows me no love-like I only hear the word love from her don't feel it's, she shows the dogs more love-and she threatens them a lot-.
My lil sis threw stuff at me for fun-she smiled and laughed for like a year until I told my parents-which she was only greeted with a verbal warning-(yet let me do it and I probably would've lost a limb it seems like). Other than that the others were only once when they happened.
My dad would when I was little would ground me for moths on end for an f-was only like 5-9-, take stuff away permanently. Is just very cold... other that that I can't rember him doing much.
The only reason I am asking is due to the fact my mind and personality has pretty much started to split into multiple.
Note:0-3 I went through four major surgeries with no pain killer-was knocked out but nothing to numb pain and was constantly sick, so this could be the base for the splitting.