Insecure friends boyfriend.

[tovaris]

So this friend of my (girl) after a time has a new boyfriend. The last guy wants really nice-just saying.
She told me this today when we were IMing after a long time. I also wrote her some "snail"mail in the past months, since it was kinda our thing.
Now enter her boyfriend, he contacted me soon after I started talking with her telling me to stop writing to her and shit. Even tho I attempted to explain to him I was not interested, and that he has no place in this he was persistent.
I of course will not humor him.

But the question is, should I tell her about this exchange?

THX for the responses, matter resolved, tho id still like to hear any interesting thaughts on the subject

[Chapperz16]

Yes otherwIse she will take your stopping of messages to mean that you don't like her as a friend. He needs to understand that she can have male friends.

[tovaris]

Yes otherwIse she will take your stopping of messages to mean that you don't like her as a friend. He needs to understand that she can have male friends.

i do not indend to stop talking to her no mather how thretning he gets. The question is should, or at what point should she know

[Chapperz16]

I'd say from the beginning. She deserves to know everything that is being talked about behind her backl.

[tovaris]

I'd say from the beginning. She deserves to know everything that is being talked about behind her backl.

It doesn't seem to be to gentelmanly of me, and otherwise hes a nice guy, wouldnt that strain a young relationship 2 much?

[Chapperz16]

It would not be the gentleman thing delay telling her when she'll need to find out sooner or later right. Tell her but in a nice way.

[tovaris]

It would not be the gentleman thing delay telling her when she'll need to find out sooner or later right. Tell her but in a nice way.
Your logic is sound, but i am weary of the female reaction. I like that she is happy.

[Chapperz16]

Be nice and calm and she should respect the fact you told her, say that he is a nice guy but needs to understand you two have been friends for a long time and nothing more.

[Uniquemind]

Better yet tell your girlfriend, and let your girlfriend relay the message that "friend's boyfriend" tried to micromanage her social life.

Unless you are a super shady person, there's no logical reason why he should be telling her to break contact with you.

If unbeknownst to you if she has some secret crush on you, and he knows that then maybe that explains his behavior, but even in that case that's between himself and his girlfriend.

You're taken and have your own girlfriend so I recommend just backing away sometimes.

[tovaris]

Better yet tell your girlfriend, and let your girlfriend relay the message that "friend's boyfriend" tried to micromanage her social life.

Unless you are a super shady person, there's no logical reason why he should be telling her to break contact with you.

If unbeknownst to you if she has some secret crush on you, and he knows that then maybe that explains his behavior, but even in that case that's between himself and his girlfriend.

You're taken and have your own girlfriend so I recommend just backing away sometimes.

i did end up asking a nother female friend on how to package the news, but i am not taken, what gave you that ide? :P

[Zachary G]

Yes otherwIse she will take your stopping of messages to mean that you don't like her as a friend. He needs to understand that she can have male friends.

Exactly. She needs to know that he is trying to interfere in the friendship between you two and how you feel about it.

[West Coast Sheriff]

I would tell her immediately, like next time you talk to her about his jealousy/over protective tendencies.

[Uniquemind]

i did end up asking a nother female friend on how to package the news, but i am not taken, what gave you that ide? :P

Coincidence I guess.

I wouldn't get other females involved other than your girlfriend then.

Or handle the situation yourself, between your female friend and you.

Let me ask for clarification on one point.

In the OP, why did you call her your girlfriend's friend? Why did you just not call her "your friend, who is a girl"?

I am noticing confusion by responders of this thread including myself.


I told you to have your girlfriend run the message because of how you phrased those words. It implies your girlfriend is closer to her, than you are.

Also since she would be a female talking to a female, it would be less likely to set off alarm bells on that dude's mind. He's insecure as a faulty bridge made in China.

[tovaris]

Coincidence I guess.

I wouldn't get other females involved other than your girlfriend then.

Or handle the situation yourself, between your female friend and you.

Let me ask for clarification on one point.

In the OP, why did you call her your girlfriend's friend? Why did you just not call her "your friend, who is a girl"?

I am noticing confusion by responders of this thread including myself.


I told you to have your girlfriend run the message because of how you phrased those words. It implies your girlfriend is closer to her, than you are.

Also since she would be a female talking to a female, it would be less likely to set off alarm bells on that dude's mind. He's insecure as a faulty bridge made in China.

So this friend of my (girl) after a time has a new boyfriend. The last guy wants really nice-just saying.
She told me this today when we were IMing after a long time. I also wrote her some "snail"mail in the past months, since it was kinda our thing.
Now enter her boyfriend, he contacted me soon after I started talking with her telling me to stop writing to her and shit. Even tho I attempted to explain to him I was not interested, and that he has no place in this he was persistent.
I of course will not humor him.

But the question is, should I tell her about this exchange?

THX for the responses, matter resolved, tho id still like to hear any interesting thaughts on the subject

You must have misred comerad
Thanks for the response nontheles

[Uniquemind]

You must have misred comerad
Thanks for the response nontheles

Oh that's why! Well your English is off a little bit but you make sense now after the edit.

How did you resolve the situation?