What Girls Look For In Guys (Top Qualities)

[maniamsmart]

Ever wondered why you're not getting girls, and every other guy is? Or why the "alpha males" seem to get all the girls, and why it always seems like girls like "assholes" over the "good guys"? It has to do a lot with how you act, and the traits and qualities you have. Check out my most recent video (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YMOQxChfF9o) I made, if you don't want to read all of this :P Hopefully you find this helpful, and hopefully it gives you some insight into girls.

PASSION
A lot of people simply wake up, eat, work, sleep, and continue the routine. People with passion have drive, a purpose, something they care about. A lot of times these people are interesting. Interest leads to interaction, enthusiasm, etc.

CONFIDENCE
Cliche, yeah, I know. Don't mistake this for arrogance, don't be selfish, disrespect others, be humble, don't lower other's' values. Confidence is knowing what your worth, what you're capable of, even if people bring you
down. It's not about failing, but rather getting past the fail and succeeding. Confidence is working for what your worth and not expecting it or deserving it. Dont whine, push through, don't let people walk over you.

RESPECT
Someone who understands what it means to be a woman, understands them, listens to them, don't see them as inferior, see them as equals. Seeing someone as an equal is crucial in a relationship.


INTELLECTUAL CURIOSITY
Yes, being smart actually counts for something. Doesn't it somehow connect to confidence a little maybe? If you finished high school learning doesn't end, if you finished college learning doesn't end. Learning never ends. Connect to passion? A person who wants to improve themself, learn about the world, actually use their time wisely than spend hour playing black ops trying to get a better KDA.


A SENSE OF HUMOR
Everyone loves to laugh, girls love to laugh. Feeling down, feeling sad, laughing would cheer her up, wouldn't you want to laugh? A compatible sense of humor, one that you share, you can make each other laugh is very important. Those who have that, tend to be more socially experienced and intelligent. Laughter decreases stress, helps the brain function. It makes people feel better, you're making a girl feel good!

BUT WHAT ABOUT LOOKS
Sure can be important. Every girl and woman is going to like something different though. There is no clear cut way to look, you can be tall, short, bald, skinny, muscled, long hair, short hair, mustache, clean shave, beard, etc. But where a lot of commonality comes into play is with these traits. Looks definitely have an impact but everyone's preference is different. Don't worry about how you should look, but worry about looking how you want to look, and present yourself in a clean, nice fashion, showing that you care about yourself, and then you'll be in the game.

Girls do you agree? Guys, do you think you fit some of these?

[Splat]

Yes! In my opinion everything you said is spot on.
Also, people who share interests are good! Therefore you can do things that you both enjoy together.
And, especially for me, looks aren't deal breakers but due to bring sporty myself, I think I prefer more muscley / fit guys so I can do sport with them but not really ripped because that's a bit gross...

[Shiny Moon]

I agree, you got all the points right :O
Of course is like almost impossible to find a guy with all these features, but the more the merrier.

[RJH98]

Thanks for posting this. It made me do some self-reflection...

[BlackParadePixie]

I definitely agree with most of these. Passion though...maybe its because I'm still young, but I guess it doesn't matter that much to me, or I just don't put as much importance on it yet. Sure I don't want my guy to just sit around like a lame-O...but I don't really expect him to be an expert rocket scientist or anything. Though it is good to take interest in things...and yeah, be passionate about the things you like and enjoy.

I would say the most important one for me is CONFIDENCE for sure. A guy who is confident and assure of himself is very important...it's much more attractive than someone who is just super shy and like, afraid to talk to me. I'm just a girl, I'm not going to bite your head off!

And behind that is RESPECT. Respect for one another is definitely super important in a relationships, and friendships as well.

[maniamsmart]

Yes! In my opinion everything you said is spot on.
Also, people who share interests are good! Therefore you can do things that you both enjoy together.
And, especially for me, looks aren't deal breakers but due to bring sporty myself, I think I prefer more muscley / fit guys so I can do sport with them but not really ripped because that's a bit gross...

Completely understandable, and thanks for the feedback! Interest too is very important, otherwise you won't really have much to connect with :)

I agree, you got all the points right :O
Of course is like almost impossible to find a guy with all these features, but the more the merrier.

Hmm, there are some guys out there like that :P I don't mean to toot my own horn, but I think I have a good 4/5 of these, and I can confidently say that :)

Thanks for posting this. It made me do some self-reflection...

Awesome, that's exactly what I wanted to see!

I definitely agree with most of these. Passion though...maybe its because I'm still young, but I guess it doesn't matter that much to me, or I just don't put as much importance on it yet. Sure I don't want my guy to just sit around like a lame-O...but I don't really expect him to be an expert rocket scientist or anything. Though it is good to take interest in things...and yeah, be passionate about the things you like and enjoy.

I would say the most important one for me is CONFIDENCE for sure. A guy who is confident and assure of himself is very important...it's much more attractive than someone who is just super shy and like, afraid to talk to me. I'm just a girl, I'm not going to bite your head off!

And behind that is RESPECT. Respect for one another is definitely super important in a relationships, and friendships as well.

LOL, yeah I don't see why a lot of people are so scared and shy, personally. It's not like girls are some evil form of a human who are out to get you :P

[Uniquemind]

It varies girl to girl on what they're looking for.

But for me and from the conversations I've had with friends we all want:

1. Self-Confidence

2. Creativeness/Wit

3. At least average good looks (some of us have higher standards or specific trait preferences or fetishes which I won't go into, but it's worth this footnote).

4. A good heart and kind personality but not rigidly so. (By this we didn't meant a rule follower, it was argued a "bad boy" could have a good heart too).

5. Good listener with a brain behind those ears (good intellect), almost required to mentally stimulate us both in and out of bed.

6. Good communicator and this is related to #5 so idk if it's really separate or not.




This is a repost of mine on another thread that discusses the same topics.
maniamsmart We both hit on the same concepts, but let's actually take this one step further and discuss the blind spots that keep getting either sex, but girls especially into situations where midway into the relationship they discover the guy's an asshat or a fuckboi.

The criteria are complex but why does it fail to detect sour grapes? Is it lust? Is it the female equivalent of guys thinking with their dick?

[Gumleaf]

Hmmm, I'm screwed. I don't think I could ever live up to all those things. Although it does help answer the why I am single question. Cheers.

[Chapperz16]

Good post, made me consider the way I present myself.

[Taryn98]

I agree with Fiona and your list in general. Confidence is number 1! Being smart and funny are a close 2nd/3rd.

[Uniquemind]

Hmmm, I'm screwed. I don't think I could ever live up to all those things. Although it does help answer the why I am single question. Cheers.

Good post, made me consider the way I present myself.


See guys, girls aren't THAT hard to understand, you just got to shift your perspective a bit and you'll start seeing the methodology behind how we work.

Oh and just in case the whole girl dropping trick "test questions" or "social situations" was something we only due to boys, we also do it to our fellow girlfriends too to test the foundation of various friendships.



Also FYI, this explains why many of us girls are complete fools sometimes for musicians, and other types of artists.

[maniamsmart]

This is a repost of mine on another thread that discusses the same topics.
maniamsmart We both hit on the same concepts, but let's actually take this one step further and discuss the blind spots that keep getting either sex, but girls especially into situations where midway into the relationship they discover the guy's an asshat or a fuckboi.

The criteria are complex but why does it fail to detect sour grapes? Is it lust? Is it the female equivalent of guys thinking with their dick?

Because all human beings are selfish, it's a natural part of life. No matter who you are, you're selfish in one way or another. Some people will have a mask up for up to 3 months, and sometimes even more pretending to be someone they are not just because they want something to happen, or want to reach a goal, whether it may be to break up a couple, have a sexual affair, prove a point, or simply just do it out of boredom.

It's pretty easy to fake being all of these mentioned in the criteria, but what isn't as easy is truly being these, and with truly being them, comes consistency and time. Most people like you said, midway through the relationship find out that a guy/girl isn't what they are looking, for because people fall far too hard for the first impression, and don't have enough experience usually to detect "sour grapes", nor have the open-mindedness when madly in love to even think rationally.

So this may lead you to a question of how can we weed out the bad from the good, and that's a difficult question to answer, because it can be very difficult and without enough experience, knowledge, or acceptance of modern society and standards someone may always be in the dark whether a boy/girl is truly who they are. The best thing to do is to stay aware, and don't fall too quickly or too hard, and give it time to see if consistency with their personality stays... consistent.