life with two brothers

[danym]

I am 13 yo soon be 14 and live with my two older brothers 19 and 23. dad left us when I was a kid, we never heard or saw him for at least 5 years. Our mother died last year, and the court awarded custody over me to the eldest brother. Middle brother and I were then moved with him and began to live together. I thought living with two brothers is immensely fun and relaxing, but I have a feeling like I've got the new parents. The two of them are as best friends, going out together, have their own stories and secrets, but they treat me like a small child. For example, I have my curfew, if I want to go somewhere I have to always ask for permission, always ask me if i finished my homework ... last week I got a spanking and i am grounded for two weeks. ok I know I am guilty and all but I would not have behaved in such a way if they just treated me little differently (even I think i occasionally do some things more out of spite than anything else). primarily older brother, the middle is not so much involved when it comes to discipline and rules.
I love them and all, but honestly I'm jealous of their relationship and angry I am treated like a little kid ...

[Adventure boy]

I am 13 yo soon be 14 and live with my two older brothers 19 and 23. dad left us when I was a kid, we never heard or saw him for at least 5 years. Our mother died last year, and the court awarded custody over me to the eldest brother. Middle brother and I were then moved with him and began to live together. I thought living with two brothers is immensely fun and relaxing, but I have a feeling like I've got the new parents. The two of them are as best friends, going out together, have their own stories and secrets, but they treat me like a small child. For example, I have my curfew, if I want to go somewhere I have to always ask for permission, always ask me if i finished my homework ... last week I got a spanking and i am grounded for two weeks. ok I know I am guilty and all but I would not have behaved in such a way if they just treated me little differently (even I think i occasionally do some things more out of spite than anything else). primarily older brother, the middle is not so much involved when it comes to discipline and rules.
I love them and all, but honestly I'm jealous of their relationship and angry I am treated like a little kid ...



I think they want to protect you and look after you as you are growing up that's why there giving use discipline and punishment........

[Vermilion]

You are the youngest so they want you to do well. They are doing what they think is best for you. I don't belive that you can have a best friend and father figure as one person. There has to be limits for you do you disagree ?

As for the relationship tell them how you feel

[danym]

yeah, I assumed that you will say exactly that, they want to protect me', and i appreciate it.
but what's wrong if they introduce me to some of their stories and jokes, but as soon as some of their friends come to our house they immediately say'' kid, go to your room, you have no business here, nothing interesting for you to listen...'' !
they always had each other while growing up, even had some common friends, and I went through all of it alone. when I went to primary school, they already largely been reached puberty and were running away from me ...
I thought that the situation will at least a little change now that we are alone three of us, but ...

[Vermilion]

Can you not tell them how you feel ?

[danym]

they know how I feel, I told them a couple of times, and they say they dont want me to feel that way, that they love me and that I can always ask them when i need something, they were there for me. but as that the next day they forget about it and go back to usually
there is good times, of course, when we are alone, just three of us, watching movies or football, but less and less. they both work, and come home tired or just go with their friends somewhere, and sometimes i really feel lonely, and thats the reason why i sometimes doing some crazy stuff, just to draw their attention...:/

[Zachary G]

You are the youngest so they want you to do well. They are doing what they think is best for you. I don't belive that you can have a best friend and father figure as one person. There has to be limits for you do you disagree ?

As for the relationship tell them how you feel

Exactly!! This^^

[Vermilion]

they know how I feel, I told them a couple of times, and they say they dont want me to feel that way, that they love me and that I can always ask them when i need something, they were there for me. but as that the next day they forget about it and go back to usually
there is good times, of course, when we are alone, just three of us, watching movies or football, but less and less. they both work, and come home tired or just go with their friends somewhere, and sometimes i really feel lonely, and thats the reason why i sometimes doing some crazy stuff, just to draw their attention...:/

They have to work to support them self and you, I do know how annoying it when I was younger I hated that my dad wasn't home much and that I'd only see him a hour a day if that. And yes getting in trouble at home was the best way to get his attention. Can you get out with your friends ? Like they do

[danym]

well my curfew is 9 pm only on weekends when it is 10 pm.and i can go with my friends, but of course only if i first done with my homework and chores...

[Bull]

well my curfew is 9 pm only on weekends when it is 10 pm.and i can go with my friends, but of course only if i first done with my homework and chores...

Sounds reasonable. The age gap is significant between you and your brothers. You need friends your own age just as they have friends their age. They are both adults, you are still a minor, and in their eyes, a kid. So show some independence from them and be your own person. Also, be grateful the court allowed your brother to become your guardian. It could have been a lot worse.

[Bull]

opps!

[danym]

well, that is the problem, i don't have many friends. after mom's death we moved to another town, because my elder brother already lived and worked there, so i needed to change my school. i have maybe 2 or 3 friends here, but they all go out on a parties every weekend, and as i said i have permission only to 10 pm. and thats not cool at all. last week i tried to sneak out because one of my friends had birthday party and, as you know it didn't went well...

[Vermilion]

well, that is the problem, i don't have many friends. after mom's death we moved to another town, because my elder brother already lived and worked there, so i needed to change my school. i have maybe 2 or 3 friends here, but they all go out on a parties every weekend, and as i said i have permission only to 10 pm. and thats not cool at all. last week i tried to sneak out because one of my friends had birthday party and, as you know it didn't went well...

I think 10 pm is a reasonable time to be home by. The move and everything must of been hard for you. Have a couple of good friends is better than several not so close ones

[danym]

yup thats truth , only they aren't my best friends but i can hang out with them. only problem is that every day i have something to do, like homework and chores, and because that stupid rule and my curfew there is only left one or two ours that i could spend with my friends, and now as i said im grounded, so, no friends...
to be honest, in my life, i need brothers more...