Attractiveness

[Snazzler]

With our world, how would somone (like me) find someone right for them when people just don't call you attractive. The only thing people have really liked about me are my personality and eyes. I'm pretty skinny, and don't have ripped abs and whatnot like a lot of people like. It's troubling.

[nklarke]

Having a great personality and beautiful eyes is already a lot !

If you want more muscles it's up to you go to the gym.

How old are you?

[Snazzler]

Having a great personality and beautiful eyes is already a lot !

If you want more muscles it's up to you go to the gym.

How old are you?

I'll be 15 on the fifth of April.

[BlackParadePixie]

there's more to being attractive than just having ripped abs...

[Hotguy99]

How can I get a gf? No one wants me :'(

[Snazzler]

there's more to being attractive than just having ripped abs...

Well of course, but it seems that's what everyone wants.

[Bontigo Papi .]

I'm not that attractive , well , that's what I think, although girls call me cute and that stuff , but its much more then the looks that count , and don't try working out now if you're skinny, wait till you're older and a bit fat then start hitting the gym.

[Harrier]

Abs are superficial. Yes some 15 year old girls like abs but not all and most will settle for a guy without abs if he is nice and fun and share interests and hobbies.

[BlackParadePixie]

Well of course, but it seems that's what everyone wants.
not at all. some girls and guys do, some don't.

[Vanilla Cupcake]

There's a lot to be said for beautiful eyes and a nice personality is key!
Don't worry about being skinny because for one, your still young and you will bulk up as you get older. Also, tons of girls love skinny guys, I know so many girls that love it.
Everyone likes something that the next person doesn't. I think a very attractive thing also is confidence. Someone can literally have nothing going for them in the looks department but if they are confident it somehow makes up for the rest.
:)

Oh and if your skinny then you can easily get abs faster than someone who isn't, so there ya go, get crunchin lol

[Bluebyrd]

I like skinny people and I like nice personalities. You can't be that bad! :)

[Snazzler]

Thank you everyone for all of the kind responses. I feel like I can be more confident and that someone will like me anyhow.

[thatonekidjacob]

With our world, how would somone (like me) find someone right for them when people just don't call you attractive. The only thing people have really liked about me are my personality and eyes. I'm pretty skinny, and don't have ripped abs and whatnot like a lot of people like. It's troubling.

If it means anything I bet you're cute. People are stupid.

[Snazzler]

If it means anything I bet you're cute. People are stupid.

That's what a lot of people say about me.

[thatonekidjacob]

That's what a lot of people say about me.

That you're cute?

[Abhorrence]

Dude there's someone for everyone, no matter who you are. The one for you appears at some point in your life. Despite me not at all being superstitious or anything, I believe in some sort to predetermined fate and destiny when it comes to soulmates and stuff. Just go through life chilling, have dates, have mates and go with it. You'll find the one that you click with.

[SillyShyGuy]

You do not need abs silly. If you look as skinny as Andy Biersack or a skater dude then you are fine. Looks do not matter that much. You just need to be a funny guy because girls love that. Be friendly, a gentleman, and try your best not to say anything stupid. Just go up to a girl you like and ask her to hang out with you. Maybe study for one of your classes, go get ice cream, or see a movie.

[bruhh15]

Dude, don't put yourself down like that. Love isn't and shouldn't be based off of looks. There's more to it! Hope soon u feel more confident!

[angelina]

Apart from your abs or 6 packs and all that real personality depends on the good beahviour of a person and it will attract everybody

[tulolita2015]

Personality and good feelings are better than abs and stupidity and bad feelings, take it easy your girl will come to you. :-)

[Zachary G]

People who only judge you by your appearance are superficial and not the kind of people you would want to be with anyway. There is more to you than just what people see, you have a personality, I am sure a sense of humor, a good heart, and so much more that make you whole. There is someone out there for you, who will appreciate you for the whole person you are and not just part of you. Dont stress it, just continue to be yourself, there arent a lot of people out here in the world who know how to do that. You are who you are and there is no changing that, appreciate it and own it.

[Meamo]

Personality is what's actually important. Not your penis length or whatever. You want a girl who loves you for you, not what you look like. So don't kill urself trying to get abs and muscles for a girl, just be urself and someday a girl will come. Just be patient

[Snazzler]

That you're cute? Yeah, thats what they say.

[angelina]

I feel like I can be more confident and that someone will like me anyhow.

Yeah...you should be more confident...more over you know very well that there is no marketing strategy for getting LOVE from a girl and vice-versa...good luck

http://thereforenow.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/victory-main_full-300x210.jpg

[West Coast Sheriff]

With our world, how would somone (like me) find someone right for them when people just don't call you attractive. The only thing people have really liked about me are my personality and eyes. I'm pretty skinny, and don't have ripped abs and whatnot like a lot of people like. It's troubling.

Honestly, I feel bad for attractive people or anyone with a remotely decent body. We will lose their bodies as we age. Physical beauty becomes obsolete. However, our personalities will remain. Also, if someone has a bad personality, people will not want to be around them.

Remember that your body will grow old and in 40 years, we will all be fifty year olds with aging bodies. Your personality will matter at fifty. Most importantly, remember that confidence is important. Cockiness is bad but, confidence is a good thing. Be confident about yourself.

[Uniquemind]

Honestly, I feel bad for attractive people or anyone with a remotely decent body. We will lose their bodies as we age. Physical beauty becomes obsolete. However, our personalities will remain. Also, if someone has a bad personality, people will not want to be around them.

Remember that your body will grow old and in 40 years, we will all be fifty year olds with aging bodies. Your personality will matter at fifty. Most importantly, remember that confidence is important. Cockiness is bad but, confidence is a good thing. Be confident about yourself.

I don't agree. I think looks are one thing, and everyone will have their own tastes on probably a statistical bell-curve of preference, and then personality is another factor.

Then you have different contexts where you need one or both of those qualities to go on the prowl for sexual opportunity, and then you have another context where you want sexual and romantic opportunities.

If you're gorgeous, it does not imply one's personality is sour or bad. There are some people who have it all, and some age better than others, and life choices like diet and exercise impact how one retains their looks as they age as well.

It's a complex topic.

[West Coast Sheriff]

I don't agree. I think looks are one thing, and everyone will have their own tastes on probably a statistical bell-curve of preference, and then personality is another factor.

Then you have different contexts where you need one or both of those qualities to go on the prowl for sexual opportunity, and then you have another context where you want sexual and romantic opportunities.

If you're gorgeous, it does not imply one's personality is sour or bad. There are some people who have it all, and some age better than others, and life choices like diet and exercise impact how one retains their looks as they age as well.

It's a complex topic.

Many good looking people are nice people. Allow me to clarify; I wasn't implying that gorgeous people have sour personalities. I've actually found that good looking people tend to have great personalities.

A golden personality is more important than a good body. You may be attracted to someone's physical attributes but you fall in love with their emotional qualities. Both outer and inner beauty play roles in who we find appealing, however, a strong, loving personality proves to be the more desirable trait.

Personality is who the person really is. You can't spell personality without person. How a person looks is nothing more than genetics. It's just how we look and provides to insight to who we are. I can't deny the importance of visual beauty. We hold other people to standards we've already envisioned. We reject others because they aren't good enough for our standards. I know, we humans can be cruel. Yes we want a beautiful partner but, it won't hurt us if they aren't (it shouldn't). It can hurt us if they aren't good as a person. Sure, it plays a role in deciding who we choose to associate with but, it won't really matter like a personality does. We need to be around people who treat us well and demonstrate kindness and compassion. Isn't that what we really look for in a person? Someone who is kind, loving, compassionate and meets our standards for beauty. So both are important but, personality actually describes a person and who we are around.

Personality lasts longer and therefore must be the more desirable trait. That is what we will live with, be around and spend our lives with: their soul, not the vessel that houses it. The body ages. Certainly, diet and exercise are important factors pertaining to aging. Inevitably, we will grow old. When that occurs, all we will have left of ourself and our significant other will be our inner qualities (I guess we will still have our health but that's not the point). We should focus more on our personalities than our bodies because it will continue to describe us when our looks no longer can.

Yes people will choose who they affiliate themselves with based off both looks and personality. However, at the end of the day we will care more about who the person is than how they look. In return, we should give our best personality to our partner as it is the more desirable trait.

[Uniquemind]

Many good looking people are nice people. Allow me to clarify; I wasn't implying that gorgeous people have sour personalities. I've actually found that good looking people tend to have great personalities.

A golden personality is more important than a good body. You may be attracted to someone's physical attributes but you fall in love with their emotional qualities. Both outer and inner beauty play roles in who we find appealing, however, a strong, loving personality proves to be the more desirable trait.

Personality is who the person really is. You can't spell personality without person. How a person looks is nothing more than genetics. It's just how we look and provides to insight to who we are. I can't deny the importance of visual beauty. We hold other people to standards we've already envisioned. We reject others because they aren't good enough for our standards. I know, we humans can be cruel. Yes we want a beautiful partner but, it won't hurt us if they aren't (it shouldn't). It can hurt us if they aren't good as a person. Sure, it plays a role in deciding who we choose to associate with but, it won't really matter like a personality does. We need to be around people who treat us well and demonstrate kindness and compassion. Isn't that what we really look for in a person? Someone who is kind, loving, compassionate and meets our standards for beauty. So both are important but, personality actually describes a person and who we are around.

Personality lasts longer and therefore must be the more desirable trait. That is what we will live with, be around and spend our lives with: their soul, not the vessel that houses it. The body ages. Certainly, diet and exercise are important factors pertaining to aging. Inevitably, we will grow old. When that occurs, all we will have left of ourself and our significant other will be our inner qualities (I guess we will still have our health but that's not the point). We should focus more on our personalities than our bodies because it will continue to describe us when our looks no longer can.

Yes people will choose who they affiliate themselves with based off both looks and personality. However, at the end of the day we will care more about who the person is than how they look. In return, we should give our best personality to our partner as it is the more desirable trait.

I see your point and after you have rephrased I agree.


But just because I can't let it go entirely I have to throw this question which is now begged because you said looks were "nothing more than genetics".

So you're saying personality isn't genetic?

I think biology and attraction and who we end up dating and being intimate with for short or long term really being attracted to someone else's genetic code, and both physical attributes and personality together communicate that information about what they offer to a potential mate.

[West Coast Sheriff]

I see your point and after you have rephrased I agree.


But just because I can't let it go entirely I have to throw this question which is now begged because you said looks were "nothing more than genetics".

So you're saying personality isn't genetic?

I think biology and attraction and who we end up dating and being intimate with for short or long term really being attracted to someone else's genetic code, and both physical attributes and personality together communicate that information about what they offer to a potential mate.

Personality is somewhat genetic. I think our environment, upbringing, friends and external factors really create it. There always will be that unsolvable nature v nurture debate.

[caged_owl]

Unfortunately.......everyone loves to go "oooh dont worry about looks...its your personality that matters"

And then those people proceed to only go after "attractive people" even though their total a--holes or b----s.

[LITTLEANGEL19]

For me its not about body looks its whats on the inside that counts :)

[amgb]

Puberty is a time for physical and hormonal changes in the body; it's normal and common to worry over how attractive you are to others. Everyone's different and everyone likes certain different physical features, not everyone is attracted to ripped abs. Some people are, and that's okay. You will find someone who will like you for being exactly you, no matter how skinny or masculine or tall you are. If you are the right person for that someone, they will accept everything about you. They will be comfortable with your looks - and who knows, the things about you you've disliked could be all the things that one person loves about you~

[UNKNOWN8198]

Look are no longer that important in how people view other people. Long term relationships are generally ones where the 2 people connect on an emotional level, not just a physical level, as looks can fade but generally your personality stays more or less the same.

As someone who doesn't particularly like the way they look, I generally think of this, but also I look at other relationships and consider the fact that although I don't find that person attractive, the partner obviously does, so there will be people out there who will find me/you attractive as well, even if we don't see ourselves to be.

[TeenPortland]

The most important thing is to be yourself. Do that and good things will come

[CuteGuy889]

This is physical attratctiveness and therefore personality doesnt count here...It is mainly your built and face structure...I was told I'm cute & attractive...I apperently have a nice face ''structure'' and am tall and slim...I used to be skinny and ripped too......But now have filled out and put on a soft tummy roll..But my GF + other girls find it even cuter..they say my fuller face looks ''cheekier'' and clothes hang on my fulller body better..
So I guess as long as one doesn't get really fat and remain slim what matters is the general body structure and face structure and not ripped body..

[Price]

Attractiveness is something you can always improve. A nice hairstyle and white teeth will make your face look its best. A fit/lean or muscly body will make a big difference too (if you want to make the effort). And then the most important thing: saying words to make others feel good around you. Effort is the key.