A gigantic web of secrets basically

[Silvera]

Honestly, I don't know what to do without shattering every single friendship I have.
I'll lay it all out for you:
Friend 1: Call her Samantha (Best friend)
Friend 2: Call her Ashley (a good friend)
Friend 3: Call him Adam (He is dating Samantha)

Both me and Ashley have a crush on Samantha's boyfriend, Adam, and obviously this is a very bad thing. We confessed this to each other about a month ago and I've regretted it ever since. Neither of us have told Samantha, and I don't know if I should or not. If I told Samantha about Ashley, she would do the same thing to me.

Ashley started texting Adam a lot more, and she shows me most of their conversations. I've learned a lot about him that I'm not supposed to know, including some very dangerous secrets about him. These secrets horrify me and I wish I never found out about them.

Adam and Samantha have been fighting recently, and Adam has confided in Ashley a lot. She of course told me about all of this (I'm not supposed to know any of this.) About a week ago, I asked Adam what had been wrong lately, and he confessed something. He knows about Ashley's crush on him, and I told him that I didn't know about it, and I still haven't told her that he knows because I'm afraid Ashley will get upset and tell Adam and Samantha that I have a crush on him too. So I'm basically keeping secrets from everyone now, and it's extremely hard to not tell. I want everyone to know the truth, but I don't know if I should tell these secrets. I don't want to lose my friends because of this, but the secrets keep piling up.

I know this was super long and confusing but I need advice. I never expected I'd be stuck in this stupid situation but here I am. I'm thinking about telling Samantha all I know on Tuesday but I don't know what to really do.

[lliam]

Who tells you to bother with things that don't concern you? Don't intervene .

You shouldn't talk to Sam, but with Ashley instead. Above all you should make clear that you don't want get involved with that whole gossip anymore. And she even should stay out of it as well.


That's a quite simple solution.

[Silvera]

Who tells you to bother with things that don't concern you? Don't intervene .

You shouldn't talk to Sam, but with Ashley instead. Above all you should make clear that you don't want get involved with that whole gossip anymore. And she even should stay out of it as well.


That's a quite simple solution.

The thing I'm uncomfortable with is the secrets that I already know. I've already told Ashley not to tell me anything else, but that doesn't change the fact that I already know so much that I'm uncomfortable with knowing. So I don't know whether or not to tell Samantha about the things I should not know but do know.

[Leprous]

Honestly, I don't know what to do without shattering every single friendship I have.
I'll lay it all out for you:
Friend 1: Call her Samantha (Best friend)
Friend 2: Call her Ashley (a good friend)
Friend 3: Call him Adam (He is dating Samantha)

Both me and Ashley have a crush on Samantha's boyfriend, Adam, and obviously this is a very bad thing. We confessed this to each other about a month ago and I've regretted it ever since. Neither of us have told Samantha, and I don't know if I should or not. If I told Samantha about Ashley, she would do the same thing to me.

Ashley started texting Adam a lot more, and she shows me most of their conversations. I've learned a lot about him that I'm not supposed to know, including some very dangerous secrets about him. These secrets horrify me and I wish I never found out about them.

Adam and Samantha have been fighting recently, and Adam has confided in Ashley a lot. She of course told me about all of this (I'm not supposed to know any of this.) About a week ago, I asked Adam what had been wrong lately, and he confessed something. He knows about Ashley's crush on him, and I told him that I didn't know about it, and I still haven't told her that he knows because I'm afraid Ashley will get upset and tell Adam and Samantha that I have a crush on him too. So I'm basically keeping secrets from everyone now, and it's extremely hard to not tell. I want everyone to know the truth, but I don't know if I should tell these secrets. I don't want to lose my friends because of this, but the secrets keep piling up.

I know this was super long and confusing but I need advice. I never expected I'd be stuck in this stupid situation but here I am. I'm thinking about telling Samantha all I know on Tuesday but I don't know what to really do.

Well, I think telling Samantha about it might not be the best thing. As you said Ashley might also tell her about your crush on Adam. If I were you I would stay completely neutral in all this. It may be hard knowing all these things, but telling someone might not solve it right now, I hope it all works out for you.

[Melodic]

Like others have said, just keep quiet about things as it doesn't really affect you.

I don't personally know Ashley so I can only go by assumption. If you can't trust her to keep your secrets, she isn't really a good friend to rely on.

[lliam]

The thing I'm uncomfortable with is the secrets that I already know. I've already told Ashley not to tell me anything else, but that doesn't change the fact that I already know so much that I'm uncomfortable with knowing. So I don't know whether or not to tell Samantha about the things I should not know but do know.



The only solution I see how to handle your personal prob with all this junk, is that you talk to someone about it. Someone you can trust and who is professional enough to be able to keep these secrets. eg A person who acts like a confessor of the Catholic Church or such. And I guess it's obviously that Ashley can't be this person.^^