Age difference?

[BEATNiK]

Ok, so I'm 15 but i look way older than that. I'm approached by girl that are kinda older than me. My first GF was 17 and my current one is 19 y.o. Where I live the age of consent is 15 so we're not commiting a crime when we bang :D Anyway i wanted to ask you guys for your thoughts on this :)

[Bull]

I don't see a problem. My first relationship was when I was 17 and my partner was 21. You are ok.

[Abhorrence]

Eh, personally I don't think that 15 and 19 is really acceptable but hey it doesn't matter what I think. Honestly, if this relationship makes you happy then that's the main thing. Just try to be careful, an adult going with a teenager (for me) says a lot about the adult. It worries me that they're not dating someone their own age.

[Legoboy]

I think its fine for you, but the older person has more to lose so they are the ones who should be worried in my view because they are an adult as the law sees things. So I think if you care about them you have to kind of look out for their best interests.

[SethfromMI]

Eh, personally I don't think that 15 and 19 is really acceptable but hey it doesn't matter what I think. Honestly, if this relationship makes you happy then that's the main thing. Just try to be careful, an adult going with a teenager (for me) says a lot about the adult. It worries me that they're not dating someone their own age.

I mean, if there are no possible legal ramifications for her and you both want to do it fine. I do agree with Jack it does say something why a 19 year old girl would date a 15 year old boy (even if you look older)and you should show some caution. be safe, but if you're both happy, then go for it

[Cadanance00]

I don't see a problem as long as you're not hurting anybody. She's a lot older so she's just playing around so don't fall in love.

[Bull]

Eh, personally I don't think that 15 and 19 is really acceptable but hey it doesn't matter what I think. Honestly, if this relationship makes you happy then that's the main thing. Just try to be careful, an adult going with a teenager (for me) says a lot about the adult. It worries me that they're not dating someone their own age.

Chronological age is not the only consideration, in fact for me it is not that big a deal after the age of 15 or 16. Maturity level is much more important. Often the maturity level of your age group is well below your own, therefore it is much better of individuals of like maturity spend time together. For me at age 17 (I was duel enrolled in HS and community college) I found the dating pool of my age group boring and self centered who could not carry on an intelligent conversation. I found college age students much more interesting and enjoyable to date.

[Kirina]

She's a lot older so she's just playing around so don't fall in love.

You can't say for sure that she's playing around.

[Cadanance00]

You can't say for sure that she's playing around.

Well you're a girl so I'll take your word for it. What does a 19 y/o girl want long term with a 15 y/o boy?

[AutumnWinds]

Ok, so I'm 15 but i look way older than that. I'm approached by girl that are kinda older than me. My first GF was 17 and my current one is 19 y.o. Where I live the age of consent is 15 so we're not commiting a crime when we bang :D Anyway i wanted to ask you guys for your thoughts on this :)

i'm involved with someone who is significantly older than i am. obviously i can't fault someone else for the same. ;)

[ObliviousCat]

It's already been said, but maturity level is more important than chronological age, so long as there aren't any illicit acts going on. For me, my maturity level is a lot higher than those in my age group, and there's a huge difference in my interests. With my maturity level and preference, I know that by 18 I'll be in a full relationship with someone who's much older than me. So long as it's legal, however, there shouldn't be any conflicts with the system. If, in the future you go for someone else and there's a huge (noticeable) age gap, make sure both you and your partner aren't worried about what other people will think when you're out in public together.

[Kirina]

Well you're a girl so I'll take your word for it. What does a 19 y/o girl want long term with a 15 y/o boy?

I have no fucking idea, because tbh I don't understand "love". BUT my 19 year old brother has a 15 year old girlfriend and I know that his serious at least. I'm just assuming that if boys are able to, than girls are.

[BEATNiK]

You can't say for sure that she's playing around.

Haha We're both just kinda playing around. It ain't nothing serious y'all, we both know that it can't last long for various reasons. :D

[BEATNiK]

Well you're a girl so I'll take your word for it. What does a 19 y/o girl want long term with a 15 y/o boy?


You can't say for sure that she's playing around.

Haha We're both just kinda playing around. It ain't nothing serious y'all, we both know that it can't last long for various reasons. :D

[PhandomMember]

If you're both happy with it, you'll be fine. It shouldn't matter if she is a few years older. It would matter if she was around 25.

[ashdyn]

Just from personal experience I found out that doesn't really work out. When I was 13 the summer before I started HS I went to the school to take the entrance exam (private school). Anyway, I met a student ambassador that I didn't know was a senior cause she looked really young. So we hung out a few times and ended up as FWBs for the summer even after we found out about the age gap. Eventually we tried dating cause we were actually really compatible and LBR the sex was A1 lmao but when school started we really couldn't get past the age difference. All her friends were her age and thought it was weird we were dating and I felt kinda uncomfortable bringing her around my friends cause they were really immature at the time. So my advice would be if you can work past the social pressures you'll have to deal with then go for it but take it slow cause the chances of it working out long term are pretty slim :/

[BEATNiK]

Just from personal experience I found out that doesn't really work out. When I was 13 the summer before I started HS I went to the school to take the entrance exam (private school). Anyway, I met a student ambassador that I didn't know was a senior cause she looked really young. So we hung out a few times and ended up as FWBs for the summer even after we found out about the age gap. Eventually we tried dating cause we were actually really compatible and LBR the sex was A1 lmao but when school started we really couldn't get past the age difference. All her friends were her age and thought it was weird we were dating and I felt kinda uncomfortable bringing her around my friends cause they were really immature at the time. So my advice would be if you can work past the social pressures you'll have to deal with then go for it but take it slow cause the chances of it working out long term are pretty slim :/

Dats exactly how i feel bro! :)

[Cadanance00]

I have no fucking idea, because tbh I don't understand "love". BUT my 19 year old brother has a 15 year old girlfriend and I know that his serious at least. I'm just assuming that if boys are able to, than girls are.

Yeah, but there's a difference in maturity. A 19 y/o guy and a 15 y/o girl are closer in maturity than the other way around. It raises eyebrows.

[Uniquemind]

Just from personal experience I found out that doesn't really work out. When I was 13 the summer before I started HS I went to the school to take the entrance exam (private school). Anyway, I met a student ambassador that I didn't know was a senior cause she looked really young. So we hung out a few times and ended up as FWBs for the summer even after we found out about the age gap. Eventually we tried dating cause we were actually really compatible and LBR the sex was A1 lmao but when school started we really couldn't get past the age difference. All her friends were her age and thought it was weird we were dating and I felt kinda uncomfortable bringing her around my friends cause they were really immature at the time. So my advice would be if you can work past the social pressures you'll have to deal with then go for it but take it slow cause the chances of it working out long term are pretty slim :/


But isn't that peer pressure though? Rather than a quality reflected on either you or her within what mattered in a relationship?

I assume you two broke up.

But if either of you decided to endure for 5 years or more, wouldn't the stigma fade away with time?

[Cadanance00]

But if either of you decided to endure for 5 years or more, wouldn't the stigma fade away with time?

Personally I don't see the problem with it if it's a loving situation. If he's just down for porking as many chicks as he can it's one thing but if he's planning to be with her for the long haul I'm all for it.

[Zachary G]

I dont see any problems with the age difference as long as you are both consenting to the relationship and all it entails. What do your parents think? How about hers? Those are the biggest obstacles you will have to overcome because keeping a relationship like yours a secret can only lead to trouble for both of you -- more her than you -- so that is something for you both to think about.

[Uniquemind]

I also think that if there's an age gap in the relationship and both parties are mature about it, both should mutually have the discipline to play the waiting game for anything sexual until the law can be on both individuals sides.

I don't think it's that hard to wait patiently, stay single, focus on education and hobbies, and then glide on into a relationship once both are 18+.

There's no law against remaining friends and building up flirtatious sexual tension for a few years only to act on it years later once legal and consensual.


If someone can't wait, then that's a sign of immaturity and reason for the age gap to be a problem for a potential relationship in the first place.

[ashdyn]

But isn't that peer pressure though? Rather than a quality reflected on either you or her within what mattered in a relationship?

I assume you two broke up.

But if either of you decided to endure for 5 years or more, wouldn't the stigma fade away with time?

It wasn't really peer pressure for us to break up cause no one really told us to break up. It was just awkward and made it difficult. Plus sticking it out for 5 more years when you're in high school is no small feat lol I will admit age matters less as you get older it is kind of a big deal when you're in high school.

You change so much more between 14-19 than you do between 24-29

[lyhom]

personally with how old I am now I'd feel iffy at people about a 3 years or more age difference but frankly as long as you both feel comfortable and you can consent it's not in my place to judge

[Uniquemind]

It wasn't really peer pressure for us to break up cause no one really told us to break up. It was just awkward and made it difficult. Plus sticking it out for 5 more years when you're in high school is no small feat lol I will admit age matters less as you get older it is kind of a big deal when you're in high school.

You change so much more between 14-19 than you do between 24-29

But whoever said peer pressure had to be verbally stated?

Isn't peer pressure upon any concept of a choice, of inaction or action, peer pressure?

[EmilySmith]

Age factor mean nothing, besides, you know that in generally girls grow up faster than boys? so I think, boy should be elder if you want solid relationship.

[AngelMolly]

I don't think that there's any issue... It's not that big of a difference anyways...

[Uniquemind]

It's an issue legally if sex is involved, but that's all I can see.

But I'm under the impression that lots of guys aren't really mature enough to handle what a woman wants out of a relationship until they are in their mid-twenties.

Immaturity is the death of long term relationships, whomever that may be, you have to find a good match, and then acknowledge the challenges life throws at you, and have a plan for that.

[JavierDolan]

I don't see a problem here. However, I think it could be constituted as wrong if the younger person wasn't mature enough to understand a relationship with a 19 year old.

[Uniquemind]

I don't see a problem here. However, I think it could be constituted as wrong if the younger person wasn't mature enough to understand a relationship with a 19 year old.

That's how I like to judge things.

Based on comprehension level, and emotional control. Not a calender age, only in the sense of legality of things, but if both parties are mature enough, they'll be able to control themselves and follow the law and wait. Within that the relationship can still exist.

[Salad_Baby]

Practically, I'm not so sure how it would work out. She's a whole 4 more years into adulthood than you, meaning whilst she's going off to buy/rent somewhere to live you'll still be in college (or whatever it is in the USA). If that isn't an issue, do be sure it's a trye romantic relationship and not purely sexual, as it seems strange to me that she isn't dating someone her age.. But what do I know.