HELP! What is my gender?

[ptz7649]

here's the thing.
I'm not entirely female.

Or am I?! I was born as a female, obviously, but then I feel also like I'm not. I've heard about transgender, but I know that that's not me because I feel like there is a part of me that is female.

So why is this a problem? example:

Being made to wear a dress. On this occasion, I simply refused. I wouldn't do it. I said that I just didn't like the dress, but it makes me feel so uncomfortable.

Wanting to shop in the boys and girls sections.

Being told by teacher "girls on this side, boys on this side," or "girl-boy-girl-boy" order. Panic attacks in my head, but I reluctantly shuffle over to the girls side.

the research I've done includes, ie. Genderqueer, gender fluid, agender, pangender, but they are all for pan/bi sexuals... Is this right?

Anorexia. I am in recovery, after having it for 1 year and half.I have had body image issues. I compare myself to the boys, I am desperate for a flat chest. That's why it started. Not because i think I'm "fat..." But nobody knows. I will NOT relapse, but struggle to think of myself with curves.

I feel like I dont belong anywhere and it makes me so miserable. I just want to figure it out.

I look androgynous, and I'm attracted to males (but at the moment, I'm confused). I always have felt more masc. than femme, but still, I'm not a man. It's so damn confusing. IM NOT "just a tomboy", so don't say that.

Does anyone have a name for this?

Before you answer...
I know that I don't have to give myself a "label" but knowing about it would really benefit me.
.

[Desuetude]

the research I've done includes, ie. Genderqueer, gender fluid, agender, pangender, but they are all for pan/bi sexuals... Is this right?
No, that's not correct. Sexuality and gender are completely separate things. Pansexual and bisexual are sexualities e.g. who you're attracted to. Whilst the others are genders. So yes, you might find yourself fitting with one of those genders. I'd class you under 'non-binary' which is a very broad term simply meaning 'not part of the binary', so not male or female. Those other genders are listed under the non-binary umbrella term but honestly you'll just have to research more to find a term that fits, if you really need to label yourself. Maybe genderfluid? Honestly I don't know you so you'll have to work that out on your own.

[ptz7649]

No, that's not correct. Sexuality and gender are completely separate things. Pansexual and bisexual are sexualities e.g. who you're attracted to. Whilst the others are genders. So yes, you might find yourself fitting with one of those genders. I'd class you under 'non-binary' which is a very broad term simply meaning 'not part of the binary', so not male or female. Those other genders are listed under the non-binary umbrella term but honestly you'll just have to research more to find a term that fits, if you really need to label yourself. Maybe genderfluid? Honestly I don't know you so you'll have to work that out on your own.

Thanks so much, non binary is good starting Point.
Hazel

[NotQuiteANerd97]

Any sexual orientation can be combined with any gender identity. You can be a straight trans guy, or a bisexual genderqueer person.

Do you feel like the boy/girl labeling system is not for you? You might be agender.
Do you feel like you fit in with both genders? You could be bigender
Do you feel more like one gender than the other? You could just be transgender.

You don't have to label yourself, but if it helps you feel more certain about yourself, you can do it.

[ptz7649]

Any sexual orientation can be combined with any gender identity. You can be a straight trans guy, or a bisexual genderqueer person.

Do you feel like the boy/girl labeling system is not for you? You might be agender.
Do you feel like you fit in with both genders? You could be bigender
Do you feel more like one gender than the other? You could just be transgender.

You don't have to label yourself, but if it helps you feel more certain about yourself, you can do it.

Thanks so much for the help, I think that agender or bigender most apply to me. It's a good starting point for until I really understand it!

[thematthewad]

I don't want to give you any advice that might somehow make things harder, but I want to tell you this: Figuring out your gender is a difficult thing to do. For me, it took seven months. I hated not knowing who/what I was. I jumped from label to label. Research is the best thing you can do for now. Just know that one day you'll be confident in your gender again, and it'll all be okay.