His name is Matty... and I don't know what to do.

[RickMason]

I just wanted to share this little gem that happenned to me. One of my classmates caught my attraction the first few days into high school, but he seemed repulsive and hard to talk to and people talked bad about him so I gave up. The last few months however I've been spending more time with him and I figured out he's just lovely and that people who talked bad about him were just scared off by his moody nature which I wouldn't mind at all (never trusting the collective again). So I got close to him, found out he's not gay, but I didn't mind and just wanted to hang out. After a few months I'm close to giving up again since I found out his best and possibly only friend is weed... What would you do?

[Plane And Simple]

Well, me personally, I wouldn't hang out with a person who smokes weed. If you're not comfortable with him because of that, I'd just forget about him. Slowly distance away so it doesn't hurt any of you if you're to do that, you'll find someone else equally good soon

[SillyShyGuy]

If you mean to say he smokes then I would abandon ship first chance I get. Couples usually never stay together if one person does drugs and the other does not (at least not without serious arguments). It is one thing that he is not gay, but someone who does any type of smoking would turn me off right away. If you truly like this fellow then hang in there, but if you do not think he can ever like you the way he likes you then it may be best to move on. Just ask if you are not sure. Say something on the lines of, "would you ever date a guy?" or "Want to experiment," something to get him to become closer to you. Use your best judgement. :)

[Interstellar]

Personally I don't see how him smoking weed is really an issue. It's not like you have to smoke with him whenever you hang out. I have a friend that smokes weed every now and then and it's never once bothered me.
Also, think about how he'd feel. Would you want everyone to ignore you just because of the things you did?

[Desuetude]

Agree with Interstellar, I don't think that smoking should be a major factor in who you're friends with. Sure its something that tends to group people, the stoners tend to become friends but that's all due to having something in common and happens with different cliques e.g. sports, school subjects etc. You've said yourself that he's a good guy and you've been friends with him for a couple months, if he's been smoking that whole time then obviously it's not that big a problem? As long as he's not constantly high and he's not pressuring you into doing it with him then I'm honestly missing why you should stop hanging out with him.

[Melodic]

I was with a guy who smoked. Our problem wasn't even that he smoked, it was that he was a player and couldn't keep his hands to himself. He didn't ever smoke weed in front of me either because he respected that I didn't smoke. If I was with a guy and he did anything else but smoking pot, I'd try to be there for him but I'd probably withdraw myself from the relationship just because I've personally witnessed the types of problems that hardcore drugs do to people.

If he's a nice guy, I wouldn't leave. Weed doesn't have to be a factor of your relationship just because he's into it. It's like a guy breaking up with me because I like chocolate.

[JHenryF]

Yeah, if you like him, and feel that you can get past the difference, stay friends with him. Pretty much all of my guy friends smoke, including the one that I currently have a crush on. I still love them all, even though we're different.

[RickMason]

First of all, thanks for all responses and advice. To clarify some stuff: He does seem to be the kind of guy who pushes it on others. There is not a day he wouldn't ask something like "So, when're you gonna get high with me?" I used to laugh it off, but he really wants me to get into it so I promised I would eventually do some acid with him (as I'm not fond of smoking), but I have no idea what will I do when the time comes. I think it has to be my decision to do this or I may regret it. The guy is awesome: cynical, but in a good way; lazy, but in a good way... I would never change anything about him, but it sometimes seems like the price is way too high... Pun intended.

[DoodleSnap]

First of all, thanks for all responses and advice. To clarify some stuff: He does seem to be the kind of guy who pushes it on others. There is not a day he wouldn't ask something like "So, when're you gonna get high with me?" I used to laugh it off, but he really wants me to get into it so I promised I would eventually do some acid with him (as I'm not fond of smoking), but I have no idea what will I do when the time comes. I think it has to be my decision to do this or I may regret it. The guy is awesome: cynical, but in a good way; lazy, but in a good way... I would never change anything about him, but it sometimes seems like the price is way too high... Pun intended.
If you feel pressured to do something, and he doesn't seem to get the hint that you don't wanna do it, then you just have to be clearer with him. Tell him that you don't wanna smoke, and that should be that. If he doesn't respect your decision, and keeps going on about it, then he either still doesn't understand, or isn't willing to compromise. Communication is key.

[ashdyn]

Dude.....wtf

Weed - Chill, just having some fun
Acid - Life=ruined

That's like saying I don't like the taste of alcohol so I'll just shoot up some heroin instead lol
Don't let him pressure you into something you don't want to do. If you're willing to try getting high with him but don't like smoking there's always edibles but they're difficult to make. I don't know anyone that's regretted trying weed once for the rest of their life but I'm not too sure you can say the same about dropping acid tho. If you're just not about it then when he asks just literally be like nahhh I'm not about it. If he's your friend he'll understand.

[RickMason]

Dude.....wtf

Weed - Chill, just having some fun
Acid - Life=ruined

That's like saying I don't like the taste of alcohol so I'll just shoot up some heroin instead lol
Don't let him pressure you into something you don't want to do. If you're willing to try getting high with him but don't like smoking there's always edibles but they're difficult to make. I don't know anyone that's regretted trying weed once for the rest of their life but I'm not too sure you can say the same about dropping acid tho. If you're just not about it then when he asks just literally be like nahhh I'm not about it. If he's your friend he'll understand.

Well, he's just switched school so I don't think I'll be seeing him much. He'll get new people to get high with and I'll get a new friend too... hopefully... I hate that word... :(

[AutumnWinds]

I just wanted to share this little gem that happenned to me. One of my classmates caught my attraction the first few days into high school, but he seemed repulsive and hard to talk to and people talked bad about him so I gave up. The last few months however I've been spending more time with him and I figured out he's just lovely and that people who talked bad about him were just scared off by his moody nature which I wouldn't mind at all (never trusting the collective again). So I got close to him, found out he's not gay, but I didn't mind and just wanted to hang out. After a few months I'm close to giving up again since I found out his best and possibly only friend is weed... What would you do?

what would i do in terms of what? what are you considering for options? what are you expecting out of this relationship?