Debating on wether or not to attend college...

[bunnygang]

So I'm 18 and I graduated from high school in May this year. Ever since middle school my plan was to go to a 4-year university, but when my senior year came around I decided not to. I don't work either, or drive. I usually just sleep all day or go out and do something with friends or guys, so I'm kinda just enjoying myself. I'm debating wether or not to attend a 4-year university. I'm just scared that I won't take the work seriously, that's why I decided not to go in the first place. I wanted to wait until I was ready. I say I'm ready now, but when it all comes down to it and I'm there I'm scared that I'll procrastinate after procrastinate like I did all through high school. Also, to be honest I'm not that smart, so I'm scared I'm going to fail and people will think I didn't even try or give any effort even if I really did, just because I'm not smart at all. I really want to go for the experience, meeting new people, partying, meeting guys, and having a place to stay other than with my family, because I currently live with my grandparents and I HATE living with them!! They are so overprotective, they literally act like I need to wear a helmet to sit on the porch, it's annoying. They don't understand I'm a complete extrovert, and I've tried talking to them about how I feel but never seem to care. I'm the spontanius type of person that would decide to drive to Vegas at midnight, no plans or questions asked. My grandparents don't understand, they are literally stuck in another generation. I really want to go see someone I really care about who lives a state away,but they freak out if I even stay overnight somewhere for ONE night, they always want me home by one. I feel like I just want to go to college for a place to stay and to be able to have my freedom. You may say "get a job and get your own place" but first of all I don't drive. They say they'll take me to places but I 100% REFUSE to work until I learn how to drive and get my own car, because they always have some way of embarrassing me in public. And you may say "you're 18 do what you want" and the thing is I DO, I do do what I want but I'm getting really sick and tired of them yelling at me every time I come home from somewhere, and that's why I hardly even go out and it's really crushing me sitting at home all day, being an extrovert, just because I don't want to deal with them yelling at me. Plus, I'm scared they think I'm lazy because I don't work. Little do they know that I'm TECHNICALLY employed but the pay sucks, they don't know I'm a cam girl and I refuse to tell them because they're dumber than a box of rocks and think porn is illegal. I mean the pay sucks anyways, so I'm never even on lol. I just want my own place dude, I'm sick of living here but I'm broke and I'm scared if I go to college I'll end up even more broke. Like, I just don't know what to do... Like I wanna go for the experience and partying and stuff, but I don't think I would take the work seriously. Also, I live in Illinois, and hang out with more people in Indiana. So even if I did get a car, I wouldn't be able to drive it or use it because I'd be a freshman, and I've heard most colleges do not allow freshmen to have cars. So I would I ever see anyone? I doubt they'd come to me and even if they offered to, I wouldn't let them waste money on coming here to see me because I'm not even that special lol. Idk what to do, advice?

[Vlerchan]

Also, to be honest I'm not that smart, so I'm scared I'm going to fail and people will think I didn't even try or give any effort even if I really did, just because I'm not smart at all.
If you're smart enough to get into uni then you're smart enough to finish it.

If you honestly don't think you'll put in the work then don't bother. But don't let fear of something like this hold you back.

Like I wanna go for the experience and partying and stuff, but I don't think I would take the work seriously.
If those are the reasons you're listing first then it might be a good idea to work for a year - realise it sucks - and then go to college. I had 40% of my class drop out at the end of first year and in more or less all cases it's because people arrived in college with attitudes like this.

Granted college is lots of fun. I was out two to three times a week in semester one. But if you're not going to work once in a while then it's not going to be a long-lived experience.

---

You may say "get a job and get your own place" but first of all I don't drive. They say they'll take me to places but I 100% REFUSE to work until I learn how to drive and get my own car, because they always have some way of embarrassing me in public.
Use public transport.

[Uniquemind]

So I'm 18 and I graduated from high school in May this year. Ever since middle school my plan was to go to a 4-year university, but when my senior year came around I decided not to. I don't work either, or drive. I usually just sleep all day or go out and do something with friends or guys, so I'm kinda just enjoying myself. I'm debating wether or not to attend a 4-year university. I'm just scared that I won't take the work seriously, that's why I decided not to go in the first place. I wanted to wait until I was ready. I say I'm ready now, but when it all comes down to it and I'm there I'm scared that I'll procrastinate after procrastinate like I did all through high school. Also, to be honest I'm not that smart, so I'm scared I'm going to fail and people will think I didn't even try or give any effort even if I really did, just because I'm not smart at all. I really want to go for the experience, meeting new people, partying, meeting guys, and having a place to stay other than with my family, because I currently live with my grandparents and I HATE living with them!! They are so overprotective, they literally act like I need to wear a helmet to sit on the porch, it's annoying. They don't understand I'm a complete extrovert, and I've tried talking to them about how I feel but never seem to care. I'm the spontanius type of person that would decide to drive to Vegas at midnight, no plans or questions asked. My grandparents don't understand, they are literally stuck in another generation. I really want to go see someone I really care about who lives a state away,but they freak out if I even stay overnight somewhere for ONE night, they always want me home by one. I feel like I just want to go to college for a place to stay and to be able to have my freedom. You may say "get a job and get your own place" but first of all I don't drive. They say they'll take me to places but I 100% REFUSE to work until I learn how to drive and get my own car, because they always have some way of embarrassing me in public. And you may say "you're 18 do what you want" and the thing is I DO, I do do what I want but I'm getting really sick and tired of them yelling at me every time I come home from somewhere, and that's why I hardly even go out and it's really crushing me sitting at home all day, being an extrovert, just because I don't want to deal with them yelling at me. Plus, I'm scared they think I'm lazy because I don't work. Little do they know that I'm TECHNICALLY employed but the pay sucks, they don't know I'm a cam girl and I refuse to tell them because they're dumber than a box of rocks and think porn is illegal. I mean the pay sucks anyways, so I'm never even on lol. I just want my own place dude, I'm sick of living here but I'm broke and I'm scared if I go to college I'll end up even more broke. Like, I just don't know what to do... Like I wanna go for the experience and partying and stuff, but I don't think I would take the work seriously. Also, I live in Illinois, and hang out with more people in Indiana. So even if I did get a car, I wouldn't be able to drive it or use it because I'd be a freshman, and I've heard most colleges do not allow freshmen to have cars. So I would I ever see anyone? I doubt they'd come to me and even if they offered to, I wouldn't let them waste money on coming here to see me because I'm not even that special lol. Idk what to do, advice?

I'm not in your position, but in terms of your fear of failure about academia, get rid of that.

School, college, work, life it's all a game and the rules/boundaries is trying not to rub people the wrong way, and have as much fun and make as much $ as possible without directly hurting other people.

I've failed a test or two at school before, and the solution is to have the resilience to take note of your errors, correct them, and try again.

I also think that defining yourself as "dumb" is a bad way to think about yourself and pre-determines you're at a psychological disadvantage.

You are what you choose to feel emotionally, and from those emotions what you choose to act on.

--

I have another piece of advice I can offer you, but I don't know if I can according to forum rules suggest this career choice to you, and ultimately it might not before you.

Instead of outright suggesting it, I'll let you infer that you could, if you get connected to the right people who get you safely into the industry, take what you're current job at a computer, and take it to the next level.

Sounds like you want easy money, and worldly travel experiences, that's really the only option I see at the moment that fits your extrovert personality.


Vlerchan is right though, if you just want to party at a college environment, don't actually get enrolled, you'll be wasting thousands of dollars just hang around the campus and join all the parties. Not a good idea, since that same amount of money could probably buy you a small house.