Help with sis

[Cadanance00]

My sister is 12 and we used to be close like we could talk about everything then I caught her masturbating It wasn't like I even saw anything she was lying face down on the couch in her pjs with her hand in her pants watching tv but it was obvious what she was doing. I told her don't worry everybody does it and she threw something at me and yelled get out and got up and left and now she treats me like shit and won't talk to me about anything. I've tried opening a conversation about it but she just cuts me off and walks away.

Any ideas?

[CLS02]

My sister is 12 and we used to be close like we could talk about everything then I caught her masturbating It wasn't like I even saw anything she was lying face down on the couch in her pjs with her hand in her pants watching tv but it was obvious what she was doing. I told her don't worry everybody does it and she threw something at me and yelled get out and got up and left and now she treats me like shit and won't talk to me about anything. I've tried opening a conversation about it but she just cuts me off and walks away.

Any ideas?
Yes I have a good idea... She is VERY freaked out that you caught her and even afraid you might say something to your parents or even her friends when they come over. I suggest you tell her you won't tell anyone at all, ever, that you are sorry, and that you won't mention it again.

Then give her time to get over it. And DON'T MENTION IT AGAIN.

[Cadanance00]

I wouldn't even say anything to mom. She would just say, "So? Why are you telling me?" She's the most practical person about sex I know. I don't know why sis is so out of shape about it. I didn't tease her or anything and we used to be very close. She used to come get in bed with me when there was a thunderstorm.

I think what makes me so unhappy about it is it was such a sudden and complete switch.

[Desuetude]

She's just embarrassed. You have to give her some time and space to get over it and hopefully things will go back to usual. Just act as normal and she should start to realise that your attitude towards her hasn't changed, so neither should hers. Be patient and if this continues for a lot longer then sit her down and try to talk about how shes feeling/why she's acting differently. Honestly though, I think it will blow over quite soon.

[Freckles]

Tell her it's normal but to do it in a private place where nobody will see. I agree that she's embarrassed that you saw here but she didn't use very good judgement where to do it.

[Uranus]

Just don't talk with her about it.
She's probably really embarrassed and the last thing she probably wants is a conversation with you about it

[CLS02]

Just don't talk with her about it.
She's probably really embarrassed and the last thing she probably wants is a conversation with you about it
Yup... That's right!

[Cadanance00]

Yup... That's right!

You're right. I think I'll let things cool off for a while. It's been a few days now and she still doesn't talk to me much.

Do you think it's ever necessary to talk about or should I just let it go?

[CLS02]

You're right. I think I'll let things cool off for a while. It's been a few days now and she still doesn't talk to me much.

Do you think it's ever necessary to talk about or should I just let it go?
Well depending on how you handle this, one of these days you two might be able to laugh about this.

[Cadanance00]

Well depending on how you handle this, one of these days you two might be able to laugh about this.

Hope so. I miss talking with her about things. We used to talk about everything including sex but she's changed.

[Uniquemind]

Hope so. I miss talking with her about things. We used to talk about everything including sex but she's changed.

Her personality is changing because of puberty hormones fluctuating, along with brain development possibly changing her perspective on the world.

This in combo with the fact that she's embarrassed, and freaked out, etc..

She obviously feels violated by you to a certain degree, but to a certain point it's her fault because she was in a public room and not in her own for privacy.

Regardless she probably feels territorial and when you surprised her, she felt her privacy was violated or you were being a pervert towards her.

This is in retrospect, but you probably should've walked out of the room, and made some noise, and then re-entered the room.

[CLS02]

Hope so. I miss talking with her about things. We used to talk about everything including sex but she's changed.
Kayden, no... She hasn't changed. But she thinks you might think badly of her now. When the time is right talk to her as I suggested... Tell her you are sorry you caught her at a bad time, and that you pray she doesn't catch you at a similar bad time in the future. And then find some little reason that both of you can laugh about it. It'll be fine.

[ClaraWho]

Maybe because you are acting like a creep about it and being a pervert to your child sister? :/

Your other post on here stated how sexually attractive you find your prepubescent sister.

Leave her the hell alone, don't mention it again, and watch porn instead.

~ Clara

[Cadanance00]

Maybe because you are acting like a creep about it and being a pervert to your child sister? :/

Your other post on here stated how sexually attractive you find your prepubescent sister.

Leave her the hell alone, don't mention it again, and watch porn instead.

~ Clara

& what the hell did I do to you?!!!

I am not[ a pervert. I am not acting like a creep. My sister is not
pre-pubescent and is a beautiful human being.

And I have no desire to see someone else's plumbing in action.

[ClaraWho]

& what the hell did I do to you?!!!

I am not[ a pervert. I am not acting like a creep. My sister is not
pre-pubescent and is a beautiful human being.

And I have no desire to see someone else's plumbing in action.

http://www.virtualteen.org/forums/showthread.php?p=3235507#post3235507

[Cadanance00]

Honi soit qui mal y pense. (and I wouldn't dream of pmming you)

Thanks to those who offered sympathetic and helpful advice. I was under the impression this was the place to come to air out things things that are bothering people.

[ClaraWho]

Honi soit qui mal y pense. (and I wouldn't dream of pmming you)

Thanks to those who offered sympathetic and helpful advice. I was under the impression this was the place to come to air out things things that are bothering people.

Really, shame on me for thinking ill of the fact you said your sister is 'super hot' and complaining she won't let you 'see her change', or talk to you about her masturbation habits?!

Just because you don't like a response doesn't make it wrong. This isn't an encouragement forum for that which is just plain Wrong.

~ Clara

[AutumnWinds]

Hope so. I miss talking with her about things. We used to talk about everything including sex but she's changed.

have things gotten any better?

[Cadanance00]

Yes, much better, thank you.

I guess my reaction to her reaction was intensified by being told I have a different biological father than my dad. That kind of shook me up.

I got to tell her that she's only my half sister, that I have a different biological father and it's somebody we know. So we talked a long time about a lot of things and hugged a while. When she pulled away she was crying but she said she was happy. (poor mom, now she has to explain to a 12 year old how that happened)

My sis and I have always been friends with little of the sibling rivalry bullshit that I see my friends doing. It was like suddenly loosing the ability to talk to most of my family. I taught her to ride a bike and lots of stuff and she likes the outdoors like I do. (She's amazing: she's like got a compass in her head. we can be anywhere outside and she instantly knows which direction north is, and she's always right.) She's kind of a tomboy, too and I like that.

And I don't lust after her like ClaraWho thinks, I don't even like kissing her on the lips. (kiss your sister...eww!) She's into the 'I'm ugly phase' and she's not. She's not a Suzy Creamcheese, like who is? but she's a type and she is very cute. I have to admit I'm proud when guys check her out.

[Jinglebottom]

I'm mostly an ass to my sister, but then again she's a megabitch. Yet somehow, she's the closest person to me. I don't even know.

[Cadanance00]

You might try saying you won't be an ass if she won't be a megabitch and ask her how her life's going.

sis and I do something once in a while: You ask me one question and I have to answer if I can ask you one question and you have to answer. It's hilarious.

[Jinglebottom]

We're actually twins, so we're pretty much stuck facing each other 24/7 at school (same schedule) and home. We might as well get along since that's the case. :P

[Cadanance00]

We're actually twins, so we're pretty much stuck facing each other 24/7 at school (same schedule) and home. We might as well get along since that's the case. :P

Is your twin same or opposite sex. I know two opposite sex twins my age and they fight like cats and dogs.

[Jinglebottom]

Is your twin same or opposite sex. I know two opposite sex twins my age and they fight like cats and dogs.
Opposite sex. I feel like if I had a twin brother we would be best buddies cause we'd relate to each other better.

[Cadanance00]

Opposite sex. I feel like if I had a twin brother we would be best buddies cause we'd relate to each other better.

I sometimes wonder what it would be like if she and i were the same age. She's always looked up to me and wanted to do the things I was doing. I guess it wouldn't be so if she was my age.

When we were younger and I do something with my friends it was like, Jeez, Caden's sister is coming & I was like get over it. She learned all the dirty words from us and things like that. And mom would say 'don't let those boys do anything with your sister or I'll beat your bottom.'

[Jinglebottom]

I sometimes wonder what it would be like if she and i were the same age. She's always looked up to me and wanted to do the things I was doing. I guess it wouldn't be so if she was my age.

When we were younger and I do something with my friends it was like, Jeez, Caden's sister is coming & I was like get over it. She learned all the dirty words from us and things like that. And mom would say 'don't let those boys do anything with your sister or I'll beat your bottom.'
Having a little sister is actually kind of cute, you know, being protective over her and all. But having a sister that's your age? It's boring and not all that, for the most part. But at least we can make fun of our teachers together. AND since girls typically start developing earlier than boys, people often find it hard to believe we're twins, as she looks much older and mature than I do. That bugs me.

[Cadanance00]

Women are from Mars. It's true. It's really true.