Over-protective, or Normal?

[Etcetera]

These are all of the things my parents do:

- Require all passwords to any email accounts, technology, or other accounts I may have. They even tried to demand the log-in information to my school owned laptop, so that they could make sure I was not doing anything wrong. The school already watches all of the laptops, so if I was doing anything they would know.
- "Don't allow" us to have any technology in our rooms.
- Make me take my medicine in front if them (I am seventeen, and I take over 15 medicines a day.)
- Don't allow us to go to anyone's house that they are not close friends with, and friends cannot come over unless they are children of my parent's friends. The same goes for going anywhere with anyone. I can't go hang at the mall or anywhere with my friends.
- Park close enough to the school so they can sit there in the way of traffic and watch me go into the school doors.
- Limit our TV watching, and even books that we read. I am not allowed to watch spongebob and never have been, nor Harry Potter or anything of the like. They wont let us read books that they don't like either.
- Mom goes through my room, and reads everything. Even my journal, without permission. She waits and does it while I am at school.
- I used to go to a counselor for many reasons, and after every session they quizzed me on any and everything that was said.
- They call the school nurse a lot of days to check and make sure I am "okay" because they were "worried about me."
- The other day my dad came to school to make sure I was at school because they were watching my iphone location online on icloud and for a few minutes it showed that I was downtown, so he came to make sure I was at school.

This is all only a portion of it. But, I raise this question to you: do you think my parents are overprotective, or just ridiculous?

I would like to add that I have never done anything innappropriate with technology to make them this way. I have never skipped school, and I always take my medicines because I could die or be in the hospital if I did not.

[Croconaw]

They're definitely over protective because that is just ridiculous.

[ECSTASY]

omg you are 17 , they shouldn't limit you that much :o it's really over-protective .
my friend is 14 and he has the same situation :s
try to talk to them logically and politely and understand them that limiting that much isn't good really.
im limited too but not that much, all they do to control me is calling me to ask me where i am when i go out without telling them , and they just don't let me to be outside of home after 9 p.m.

[Tarannosaurus]

My parents used to be like that when I was 14 and I thought they were overprotective, but they've relaxed the rules a bit. For a 17 year old it's approaching ridiculous .

[Hyper]

- Make me take my medicine in front if them (I am seventeen, and I take over 15 medicines a day.)


Medicines for what?

[Body odah Man]

These are all of the things my parents do:

- Require all passwords to any email accounts, technology, or other accounts I may have. They even tried to demand the log-in information to my school owned laptop, so that they could make sure I was not doing anything wrong. The school already watches all of the laptops, so if I was doing anything they would know.
- "Don't allow" us to have any technology in our rooms.
- Make me take my medicine in front if them (I am seventeen, and I take over 15 medicines a day.)
- Don't allow us to go to anyone's house that they are not close friends with, and friends cannot come over unless they are children of my parent's friends. The same goes for going anywhere with anyone. I can't go hang at the mall or anywhere with my friends.
- Park close enough to the school so they can sit there in the way of traffic and watch me go into the school doors.
- Limit our TV watching, and even books that we read. I am not allowed to watch spongebob and never have been, nor Harry Potter or anything of the like. They wont let us read books that they don't like either.
- Mom goes through my room, and reads everything. Even my journal, without permission. She waits and does it while I am at school.
- I used to go to a counselor for many reasons, and after every session they quizzed me on any and everything that was said.
- They call the school nurse a lot of days to check and make sure I am "okay" because they were "worried about me."
- The other day my dad came to school to make sure I was at school because they were watching my iphone location online on icloud and for a few minutes it showed that I was downtown, so he came to make sure I was at school.

This is all only a portion of it. But, I raise this question to you: do you think my parents are overprotective, or just ridiculous?

I would like to add that I have never done anything innappropriate with technology to make them this way. I have never skipped school, and I always take my medicines because I could die or be in the hospital if I did not.

DA FUQ. That's just totally Over protective man. Like-EXTREME.

[Living For Love]

Maybe the fact that they are way too over protective is related to your health issues. The only things I think are not much normal is the fact that they don't let you read certain books or want to have your passwords.

[sqishy]

Over-protective indeed. Like a medium-security unit for a hospital or something...

[Stronk Serb]

Umm, tracing you, calling the school all the time, not allowing you privacy and certain books sounds silly but it's not normal, for a 17 year old. They should allow you to make your own decisions, by locking you, they create a barrier which prevents you from knowing what it's like outside.

[Croconaw]

You should definitely talk to your parents and tell them that you're seventeen, that you don't need them watching you like that.

[AlexOnToast]

The only thing my dad is over protective about is making sure it take my medicine and that I stay away from drugs and alcohol.. Other than that I rarely get called out for anything, including being a very obvious pyromaniac

[Etcetera]

Medicines for what?

Epilepsy, ADHD, allergies and asthma, anxiety/depression... etc. My list is long.

It's just frustrating because I will be an adult in 6 months, and I feel like I am going to go out in the real world and be lost and very confused, I've been sheltered all my life.

[JollyToes]

My mom is indifferent. I thought it was a good thing at first but now I don't think so.

[unknownuser]

Being concerned about your health and conditions is one thing... but censoring you and not allowing you all those things, yes, that is pretty unfair!

[scott757]

Sorry, I misunderstood the poll and voted "normal" I would, infact of voted "Overprotective AND Rediculous".

That's crazy - they can't really do that, it seems a bit creepy to me, if you can't live your life without them being ontop of you, it must suck, I do feel a bit sorry for you having to live with that, it would drive me insane.

[Tendencies]

I'm sorry, but that seems way over the top. They really need to chill. If I were you i'd be so uncomfortable with everything they're doing. I hope they let up a little, and give you a little freedom.

[Jez']

Way over protection and ridiculous.

[killerrockyroad]

My mom overprotective. I dont live with dad so idk about him

[Hypers]

More of overprotective, but not ridiculous since at the end of the day, they're your parents and theres nothing you can do about it.

[MortimerB]

This makes my parents seem like the most carefree people in Denmark... I hope that when you turn 18 and truly gain your individual freedom, this will cease. They don't just sound overly protective, they seem maddeningly so.

[Etcetera]

They took my phone and ipod last week because I would not give them the password to my ipod. I hid my ipad, so I still have it. I take it to school too in my bookbag so mom can't find it in my room while I am gone. And they can't take my school computer because it isn't theirs to take.

It's not like I have anything to hide, it's just the principal of the whole thing. Also, I don't want them reading my boyfriend and I's conversations because it isn't any of their business. And I'm not giving in either. They're gonna have to give it back to me this weekend for safety reasons anyways... lol. I don't think they thought that through.

[Carson99]

Someone has caused them to be this way. They are the ones who are "damaged" and don't see things clearly. You say it's not you that has made them this fearful (and it is a phobia). It doesn't really matter who has corrupted them, made them ignore their primary urge to love and trust and share.

An older sibling, a neighbor, church teachings? It doesn't matter. You are not going to change it. Just go with it. There are plenty who are much worse, more restrictive, more violent, who truly do not care. Count your blessings. Time is short.

[Fanta_Lover44]

My parents are normal, they look out for me, they don't require passwords and accounts, they're fine with everything else. But i think your parents are a bit overprotective...

[Hyper]

Epilepsy, ADHD, allergies and asthma, anxiety/depression... etc. My list is long.

It's just frustrating because I will be an adult in 6 months, and I feel like I am going to go out in the real world and be lost and very confused, I've been sheltered all my life.

Firstly I don't believe you become an adult because the law says so. You seem to understand that as well...

Secondly... Yes I think they are overprotective. I can understand concerns and so on especially if you are sick and all that but those things you listed give no reason to limit your intellectual freedom.

Also being protective does you no favors... I can't tell what is ''wrong'' with your parents or what their reasons are for this behaivour but your only option is to try and reason with them.

[Croconaw]

They're a bit over protective.

[everlong]

Yeah, I won't lie to ya, that's pretty overprotective and ridiculous. Especially knowing the fact that you're 17. That's a bit over the top.

[ArtemisLianCrock]

I thought my mum was bad, but your parents are cuckoo (no offense intended.) They need to give you more freedom.

[Etcetera]

Yeah today will be a week without my ipod and phone.

I'm hoping they give it back soon.

[JamesSuperBoy]

There is no right or wrong in the deal - seems like your health issues as you say you could die or end up in hospital without them
maybe it is time for you to discuss the issues and why should they not be protective

There is a whole mass of kids out there whos parents just dont care ----

[Etcetera]

I'm bout sick of the freaking screaming fests here. Sick of my dad. Sick of the hatefulness. And most of all, I'm sick of the fakeness. We pretend we are all one happy family, but couldn't be further from the truth.

"If you're gonna cry, I'm gonna take this belt off my waist and give you a reason to cry"
Dad to my brother because he was screaming at him and he started crying.

"You're going to be on the back of a trash truck when you grow up because you are lazy and slow in school"
Dad to my brother. My brother has a learning disability, ADHD, and dyslexia. He has been struggling in school and he has an IEP but dad was screaming at him for not getting straight A's

"I'm sick of you, it's always something and sometimes I wish I hadn't adopted you."
Dad to me when I finally told about my cutting after hiding it for five years.

"I think you're making it up to hurt me and to get attention, and that disgusts me"
Mom to me after I told about the cutting.

"Point your finger at me ever again and I'll break it so you can't"
Dad to me after he beat me in the head with a toy a month ago and I went off on him.

This isn't even a tiny percentage of what goes on in this house. And I'm getting freaking sick of it. And they wonder why I cut.

[Living For Love]

I'm bout sick of the freaking screaming fests here. Sick of my dad. Sick of the hatefulness. And most of all, I'm sick of the fakeness. We pretend we are all one happy family, but couldn't be further from the truth.

"If you're gonna cry, I'm gonna take this belt off my waist and give you a reason to cry"
Dad to my brother because he was screaming at him and he started crying.

"You're going to be on the back of a trash truck when you grow up because you are lazy and slow in school"
Dad to my brother. My brother has a learning disability, ADHD, and dyslexia. He has been struggling in school and he has an IEP but dad was screaming at him for not getting straight A's

"I'm sick of you, it's always something and sometimes I wish I hadn't adopted you."
Dad to me when I finally told about my cutting after hiding it for five years.

"I think you're making it up to hurt me and to get attention, and that disgusts me"
Mom to me after I told about the cutting.

"Point your finger at me ever again and I'll break it so you can't"
Dad to me after he beat me in the head with a toy a month ago and I went off on him.

This isn't even a tiny percentage of what goes on in this house. And I'm getting freaking sick of it. And they wonder why I cut.

That's way too bad, I thought they were just overprotective, but that you've just described sounds more like abuse.

You know, I always have arguments with my parents, especially with my mum. I don't know why, it seems we're just incompatible. If I talk to her for more than 15 minutes, we always end up arguing, it's automatic. She says I don't do well at school, I'm a PC addicted, I won't be anyone in life, always putting me down, always complimenting the sons and daughters of her friends, always comparing, saying how good they are and how bad I am, you know, that kind of stuff. And then there's my dad, who says she's right, and he always makes jokes about me, saying I won't have a future, things like that.

I tried everything I could so that they could change. I talked to them, asking why they were always mad at me, asking them why didn't they trust me, I talked to my brother for help as well, I tried to convince them I was doing my best as a student, as a son, but they just didn't care. And I assume you've already tried this, and it didn't work as well.

So, it seems there's only one option left: ignoring them, avoiding them, completely. It's what I've been doing so far, and it seems to work. When I wake up and go to the kitchen, and if my parents are there, I say "Good morning.", and nothing else until I've finished having breakfast. I prepare myself for school, and whenever I'm with them in my dad's car I don't say a single word, because if I start talking, it ends up in discussions, always. If, for instance, I'm in the living room doing something, and then my mother goes there to do something as well, I leave the room some seconds after. If they ask me something, I answer calmly and I give them the answer they want to hear, even if it's a lie (which doesn't happen much often). I don't tell them absolutely anything that's happening in school, or even in my personal life, unless they ask me, which also doesn't happen much often. And this way things appear to work. Of course, we still argue, but not so often.

I'm going to give you another example. When we're on holidays, we normally get up later then when we are in school time. At first, because we passed the whole holidays always getting up late, it may not be easy to just suddenly start to get up much earlier, but after a few weeks of school, we eventually get used to it, and then it gets just normal to us to get up at that time. The same happens with family discussions: they happen so so often that you get used to it, forcefully.

It may not be easy at first, but believe me, you'll get used to it. Just leave them talking, don't fight back, it's like bullies, they stop if you don't pay them attention. It hurts, of course, but you won't live with them forever, it will all end. Please don't do anything rash, you'll be fine.

[Etcetera]

The same happens with family discussions: they happen so so often that you get used to it, forcefully.


This is so true. It's really hard because it's like no matter what I say or do, either way it's going to start a fight.

It's getting to the point where I stay in my room 99% of the time unless they make me come out or something. And even then I don't talk to them. I try to avoid them as much as I can. They hurt me. Emotionally, mentally.

It just really sucks right now. The day I turn 18 I will be out of this house.

[Etcetera]

They're definitely over protective because that is just ridiculous.
omg you are 17 , they shouldn't limit you that much :o it's really over-protective .
my friend is 14 and he has the same situation :s
try to talk to them logically and politely and understand them that limiting that much isn't good really.
im limited too but not that much, all they do to control me is calling me to ask me where i am when i go out without telling them , and they just don't let me to be outside of home after 9 p.m.
My parents used to be like that when I was 14 and I thought they were overprotective, but they've relaxed the rules a bit. For a 17 year old it's approaching ridiculous .

DA FUQ. That's just totally Over protective man. Like-EXTREME.

Oh, and another thing, they stalk my twitter. Literally. They already took my facebook from me, and now they have it set so that when I tweet, it alerts both of their phones and then arguments get started about whatever I may have tweeted.

And they took my phone two weeks ago without giving me a reason, along with my ipod and I still don't have them back yet.