Obsessed with Guy Best Friend

[crowdlost]

So I've always loved having a guy-best friend or a "bro". Whenever I'm watching some movie that shows two guy best friends acting very brotherly, I smile and get jealous because I have always wanted that.

Five years ago, I did find a guy like that. And we've been more than "best friends" ever since. We've slept at each other's houses, we tell each other literally everything and we spend WAY too much time together.

But it's known that I like him more than he likes me. It's pretty obvious, actually. I can't imagine him possibly ever writing a post about our friendship, to begin with. Everytime we fight, I always end up talking to him first, reconciling by making a joke and hugging him when he isn't looking. He usually smiles when that happens, and everything's back to normal.

I think what I love the most about my relationship with this guy is the "physical aspect" of our relationship. No, we're not gay or anything but we do some pretty gay stuff when we're alone. We hug a lot, kiss each other on the cheeks and neck a lot, I tickle him then he attacks me and sits on me for LONG MINUTES, he puts his arm around my shoulder a lot, sleeps in my lap sometimes and I even go as far as massaging his head and shoulders.

I am personally struggling with whether or not I find him attractive, which has had me questioning my sexuality so many times. But then I think of him in a "sexual" way, and I am grossed out. I just love my physical relationship with him. Honestly, if that wasn't there, I wouldn't love and appreciate our friendship as much. But I would never do anything with him because I don't think I like that way.

So we were sort of fooling around yesterday. He is a big man, by the way lol. And kinda scary sometimes. I was pinning him down on the floor (in a very playful way) when he grabbed a cup of hot coffee and threated to spill it on me. It was funny. At first.

This went on for a few seconds, and then I squirmed and the hot coffee spilled on my face. My right eye felt like it was literally BURNING for the next few minutes. I panicked and was really annoyed.

Thankfully, like half an hour later, I was fine and it wasn't bothering me anymore. But his reaction to what happened annoyed me. He kept laughing and saying that nothing's wrong with me and that I'm just being paranoid. Which pissed me off so much.

Then a couple of hours later he tried talking to me but I was still so pissed at the way he reacted that I didn't look at him at all. So what happened, as always, is that now HE'S mad at ME and we haven't talked since yesterday. He is very annoyed with me apparently and doesn't want to talk to me.

Sorry for venting, lol. Just needed to get this all out!! Thanks!

[Green Arrow]

Awwww that's such a cute relationship that you have, people should have more like that! I think that you should let him cool down and he should come to you, he is the one in the wrong. Imagine if he had done some harm to your eye? Don't feel the need to appologise for what he did to you.

[crowdlost]

I know him pretty well and looking back at our fights in the past, I KNOW that he won't come to me first. Maybe it's a pride thing, maybe he really doesn't care, I have no idea. All I know is that I miss him already!! :(

Thank you for your comment!

[ausley]

DUDE. OMG. This was literally no joke me with this one friend who I thought was my best friend. I seriously can't get over how much this sounds like I wrote it haha
but anyway, dude not to be straight forward in an asshole kind of way but trust me its not really worth it. I know it's hard to be away from him because you were so close that you kind of feel like your life revolves around him cause that's how O felt but trust me its a terrible thing. I even went through the whole ignoring thing where we got mad at eachother and because we hung out with the same group it was like having awkward stares ALL THE TME. For me I WAS the one who had to talk to him after we ignored eachother for a month or so. Honestly he didn't even care either like he did a little but it didn't hurt him like it did me or on this case you. I myself just am not really best friends with him anymore. once in a while we will talk but im completely done with him as a bestfriend. SO MY ADVICE TO YOU is think long and hard about this friendship and what you deserve. ask yourself of he's really worht it. Also remember that the real actuallygood bestfriendships which I want is one where you and the other actually care about eachother. In my case I like the teen wolf relationship of stiles and Scott aka the Tyler posey and Dylan obrien bromance

[crowdlost]

DUDE. OMG. This was literally no joke me with this one friend who I thought was my best friend. I seriously can't get over how much this sounds like I wrote it haha
but anyway, dude not to be straight forward in an asshole kind of way but trust me its not really worth it. I know it's hard to be away from him because you were so close that you kind of feel like your life revolves around him cause that's how O felt but trust me its a terrible thing. I even went through the whole ignoring thing where we got mad at eachother and because we hung out with the same group it was like having awkward stares ALL THE TME. For me I WAS the one who had to talk to him after we ignored eachother for a month or so. Honestly he didn't even care either like he did a little but it didn't hurt him like it did me or on this case you. I myself just am not really best friends with him anymore. once in a while we will talk but im completely done with him as a bestfriend. SO MY ADVICE TO YOU is think long and hard about this friendship and what you deserve. ask yourself of he's really worht it. Also remember that the real actuallygood bestfriendships which I want is one where you and the other actually care about eachother. In my case I like the teen wolf relationship of stiles and Scott aka the Tyler posey and Dylan obrien bromance



Thank you so much!! You have no idea how much it helps to see other people understand EXACTLY what I'm going through!

Trust me, I have tried for YEARS to let him go as a friend and move on but my problem is that I always bump into him in places. We live in a VERY small town and if I'm mad at him and I see him, I feel like I am about to explode. Because I start to fight with myself, whether or not to talk to him. And it literally kills me on the inside.

I am moving away in about a month so hopefully I will FINALLY get closure after I leave. It's been 5 years of suffering and pain and I'm not so sure that these few "brotherly" moments that we have are worth it. Heck, they definitely aren't.

Today I was feeling pretty low. I started to hallucinate and make up all different kinds of scenarios in my head and I convinced myself that he seriously does not give a shit about me. Then I cried lol. I'm not the crying type of guy but I was feeling so, so, so crappy that it just happened.

Thankfully, I am feeling better now. It's a rollercoaster of emotions, really. I will probably feel like shit in a few hours. But till then, thank you for your advice and comments! It made my day to see that you understand what I'm feeling!! <3

[Living For Love]

Noooooo, please, don't end it that way! Every friendship has its ups and downs, really. What he done to you was not correct, quite exaggerated, to be honest, but all that "physical contact" you guys had, that must still mean something, you can't just... throw it away. You're right, maybe it's some kind of pride thing that he never comes back to you, but it doesn't mean he doesn't like you. Go talk to him once again, apologize, say that you kinda freaked out in the heat of the moment, but make sure he knows that he hurt you (physically) and that you would really appreciate if he didn't do that sort of thing again with you. He will probably realise he acted a bit stupidly as well. Just don't end all that friendship you two had because of that episode...

[crowdlost]

Noooooo, please, don't end it that way! Every friendship has its ups and downs, really. What he done to you was not correct, quite exaggerated, to be honest, but all that "physical contact" you guys had, that must still mean something, you can't just... throw it away. You're right, maybe it's some kind of pride thing that he never comes back to you, but it doesn't mean he doesn't like you. Go talk to him once again, apologize, say that you kinda freaked out in the heat of the moment, but make sure he knows that he hurt you (physically) and that you would really appreciate if he didn't do that sort of thing again with you. He will probably realise he acted a bit stupidly as well. Just don't end all that friendship you two had because of that episode...



Aww, thanks for your comment! Means so much to me! I don't know if this is gonna sound stalker-ish lol, but I've been waiting for your comment "ryanair" because you always give some of the best advice. You always know exactly what to say to make me feel better! I have written several threads before, all about the same issue: this guy friend, and I think you've commented on every one of them! So thank you, again, so so much!!

I will try and work it out, but not for a few days. I'm waiting for the weeked where we see each other more. Maybe he'll come to me first? Nah, I'm not expecting that at all.