I feel antisocial because I don't like/go to parties

[TheRedViper]

A few months ago I went to one of my kind-of mutual friends' 16th party, and there were about 100 people there, a lot from my year at school. I only went because a few of my good friends were going. There was no alcohol, which might have made the party better, as people I know say parties are better when you drink. I went there with the intention of being social and talkative, but just ended up hanging around a few of my friends, talking and not doing much. A girl that I'm kind of friends with wanted to dance with me, so I did, but felt like an idiot. We all laughed about it, so I didn't feel that stupid, but after that I just sat around with a few friends and talked, all of us relating to each other in how bored we were. The party finished at midnight, and I went home thinking that parties (or at least parties with no alcohol to make them more bearable) weren't really for me.

While part of me is glad I don't go out to parties just to feel included and be there, the other part of me wishes I was more social and talkative to people I don't know. One of my friends, who goes to parties a lot, like every weekend, offered to take me to a few parties, but she's told me stories of the parties she's gone to, and they sound like I'd feel really out of place. I have nothing against alcohol and drugs, and would be fine with taking them at a party just for a bit of fun. It's not that that makes me so uncomfortable at parties. It's mainly that I feel kind of shy and quiet around large groups of people I don't know. I get worried that I'd make myself look like an idiot in front of them, and I'd just sit by myself like a loner.

Does this make me antisocial? I'm worried that since I don't really feel comfortable at parties it means I won't meet new people when I go to university (I'm currently going into year 11 next year) and I won't get a girlfriend, since the only girl I had a really good friendship with we're now kind of drifting apart. Nearly all of the girls in my year level are either not attractive (I don't wanna come off as shallow, but looks do matter to me) or I really dislike their personalities. There are pretty much no girls that I think I'd like to be with, and the only one I would has left the school and has a new boyfriend every time she breaks up with the other.

Yeah sorry I kind of went off topic there. Basically my question is that since I don't really like parties (even though I've only been to 1) I'm worried that I will have trouble making new friends when I go to uni and leave my other friends.

[Dark Unicorn]

You most probably won't have trouble.I'm not a party person either and I'm shy and quiet but there are always the outgoing people that will walk up to you and want to be friends.So judging from my own experiences(last year of high school next year) you'll do just fine.And plus,they'll be lots of shy people looking to make friends so I say don't worry about it.

[Synyster Shadows]

You're not necessarily antisocial. You could be like me - introverted, especially if you just prefer to have solitude most of the time anyways. This world is dominated by mainly extroverts but there's absolutely nothing wrong with being introverted. It doesn't necessarily you're always quiet. Like, I'm quiet around most except close friends, my gf, and family. Extroversion/introversion is one of those things that people think is a binary and you're either totally one or totally the other, but that's not true. My above example would put me at maybe 60% introverted and 40% extroverted, for example. Bottom line, don't worry. You're fine.

[Coprocephalus]

I just want to point out that there is a difference between antisocial (Hates society) and asocial (Does not enjoy social contact). Anyways... As it was said before. You should be fine.

[Loreley]

I don't think it's a problem. I don't like going to parties either. Parties are just not the kind entertainment which we prefer. I think that you just don't feel comfortable there, but under other circumstances you could react better and meet new people. You are not antisocial.

[taeyo]

I'd guess you're just an introvert. That doesn't mean you're antisocial. It just means that you're a bit more selective when it comes to friends and value your alone time. I do go to parties, but it's really only with close friends. I'm very shy, always have been, and I don't like large groups of people especially if I don't know them, but I'm not antisocial. You're introverted; welcome to the club :P :D

[Hyper]

You shouldn't worry your just going through a normal stage of life. Your not ''matured'' yet and so you are in between wanting to fit in and worrying about it. Just be yourself as the cliche advice goes. Still go to parties every now and then it's not about fitting in if you aren't the most outgoing type going there just to gain experience in social skills is a good reason to go.

I don't like being the center of attention and all that but over the years I've gotten some good social skills so I don't feel so out of place at random parties as long as the crowd is ''good'' I'll find something to talk about with someone.

College is a great place for gaining that experience just don't worry about it and go and when you get a chance go to a party here or there.

[chieko]

I feel the same, except for worrying. I don't like going to parties or other social gatherings because it makes me lack out of energy. Its not because i'm shy or anything, but i'm just uncomfortable seeing a lot of people and i hate being one of the crowd. I don't worry about it because i know i've got communication skills. I can make new friends whenever i want easy-peasy. But most of the time i see friends as annoyance and disturbance in my private life. But ofcourse I still love them. I don't like talking all the time and have fun. I just prefer to be alone and enjoy doing things alone because if i have someone with me, it makes me feel obligated to talk just to entertain him or her. If i go out i prefer only one companion or two. However some people mistake me for being all the time "funny and bubbly" person so thats why I always get invited to parties. (and ofcourse i rarely go) Well, i don't know if you're also introverted. But if you are, you should not worry about it. I'm thankful my friends treat me special because they understand my introversion :D Right now i'm on college but i still don't change. I made another new few best friends in the whole world. You're lucky if you're an introvert. I love to know how interesting and mysterious are other introverts, but i never get along with them myself :)