Death

[DarkHorse4eva]

My best friend in the whole world ended on the hospital yesterday, 6 broken ribs, a concussion, a lot of scars and a punctured lung. I got to talk with him as the first when he woke up, he had a surgery 2 hours later.
I am 6 hours in front of him and was asleep when it happened, i woke up to a message from his dad, saying that he was gone... They tried to inflate his lung, but when they did it, the other punctured and he didn't make it.

I started crying when i found out and my mind started making weird scenarios, that it was my fault and i could have stopped it... it is now 5 hours ago i found out and i have been crying since. I can't believe he's gone, he was the reason i'm alive, he has helped me so much and he meant everything to me...

Hopefully his parents decide to give him a memorial service, which i'm going to join, but nobody knows anything yet.

[Quick_Sylver]

Oh hun. I'm so sorry to hear this. :hug:

Why do you think there was anything you could have done to stop it?

[The Trendy Wolf]

My best friend in the whole world ended on the hospital yesterday, 6 broken ribs, a concussion, a lot of scars and a punctured lung. I got to talk with him as the first when he woke up, he had a surgery 2 hours later.
I am 6 hours in front of him and was asleep when it happened, i woke up to a message from his dad, saying that he was gone... They tried to inflate his lung, but when they did it, the other punctured and he didn't make it.

I started crying when i found out and my mind started making weird scenarios, that it was my fault and i could have stopped it... it is now 5 hours ago i found out and i have been crying since. I can't believe he's gone, he was the reason i'm alive, he has helped me so much and he meant everything to me...

Hopefully his parents decide to give him a memorial service, which i'm going to join, but nobody knows anything yet.

It is certainly not your fault, this could happen to anybody and it would not be your fault. I'm deeply sorry that you lost your best friend, but you have to keep telling yourself that sometimes bad things happen to even the best of people, and it is simply inevitable and out of your hands.

Don't let his death determine the rest of your life, because he wouldn't want you to mourn over him for so long. I know you must feel terrible for what has happened, but just know that it was not, nor will it ever be your fault.

[AlexOnToast]

All I can say is that I am so, so sorry and if you need someone to talk to, I am here. I know how it feels to lose people... My Mum died recently enough and I never thought I would ever smile again, but I spoke to people and people supported me and now im recovering. I'm not a very well person either, I have a pretty bad metabolic condition that effects my growth and i get badly sick very often and i herd my dad being told that i cant expect a long healthy lifespan, so i think about death a LOT, but talking to people is the biggest help ever and i really hope u do :) let me know because i love to help :) Thinking of you

[DarkHorse4eva]

Oh hun. I'm so sorry to hear this. :hug:

Why do you think there was anything you could have done to stop it?

when i found out he was gone, my mind started making weird scenarios and thoughts that i could have stopped it, i could have helped him, if i just did even one little thing that i would never have thought about, i would have saved his life and i wouldn't be so sad

[Quick_Sylver]

Sometimes, no matter what you try, nothing will save anyone. Really. It's not your fault he died, I promise.

& I know that wont change how you feel. Maybe write him a letter to get some of the feelings about this out?

[DarkHorse4eva]

Every person and every little talk i've had here about my friend has been an absolutely amazing help and i want to thank all of you for caring.

right now there's nothing more i can do, i will wait and see how it turns out and see if he gets a funeral. I hope he gets a funeral so i can give him a last goodbye, no matter where in the world it is...

[RavleIncarnate]

What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger, stand a little taller - Kelly Clarkson, Stronger

[RavleIncarnate]

But how did he... go? Car accident? My grandfather died of cancer.

[DarkHorse4eva]

What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger, stand a little taller - Kelly Clarkson, Stronger

i love that song, it has helped me a couple times :-)

[DarkHorse4eva]

But how did he... go? Car accident? My grandfather died of cancer.

his friend was driving and he was passenger, they both got injured. my friend had 6 broken ribs, a punctured lung, a concussion and scars all over his body... he had a surgery where they would inflate his lung, but when they tried to do that, 2 of his ribs punctured the other lung and he didn't make it

[RavleIncarnate]

I an so sorry to hear you lost him so violently... Life is a cruel mistress. I probably wouldn't be posting this if I didn't have such a supporting crushfriend and music... But remember the one guy's signature.

"Life is like an erection, it may be long and hard, but enjoy it while you can, cause it can go away at any second."

I just added a few words, but it's a saying I'll surely remember for a long time.

[DarkHorse4eva]

i am grateful that i got to talk with him between the crash and the surgery, but sadly i didn't tell him enough how much he meant to me.

[MisterNobody]

I'm so sorry for your loss. But please know, this was in no way your fault, love. You were fortunate to be able to talk with him before he departed, however. Be grateful you at least had that, because some people would do anything for a shred of closure. If he didn't already, then I'm positive he now knows how much you love and care for him. I wish you well. Stay strong.

[DarkHorse4eva]

thank you for all your help. today his soul and spirit left me, there's a bigger piece of my heart missing now and he suddenly stopped fighting in my heart. i don't really know what to do anymore, i feel like giving up :-(

[DarkHorse4eva]

I found out today that he loved me. i found a friend of his, and have talked a lot with the last few days. he told me that he really loved me and that he kissed his friend (who is gay) because he really wanted to kiss me, but couldn't. and now the friend wants to kiss me, so he can deliver the kiss from mason to me. i don't really know what to do, i have an amazing boyfriend, and i'm kinda thinking thats what killed him, because he really loved me, and he died 8 days after i started dating my boyfriend.

[Fanta_Lover44]

Awww dude i'm so sorry to hear about this... I'm only here because two of my best friends on the internet, theres nothing you could of done, its going to hard now thats he gone, just don't give up, you got to keep your head up high and remember the good times. ;)

[DarkHorse4eva]

I've been talking a lot with the friend lately, but he makes me feel like i meant shit to mason and that he just wanted to get away from me.
i need to stop talking to him, he just makes me more and more sad and blames me for his death

[AlexOnToast]

Just a reminder Ras, you can talk to me at anytime :) #hugs

[Daz 2000]

Live your life to the max and he'll be proud of you. Stay strong ---> cos he's always at your side :-)

[Daz 2000]

All I can say is that I am so, so sorry and if you need someone to talk to, I am here. I know how it feels to lose people... My Mum died recently enough and I never thought I would ever smile again, but I spoke to people and people supported me and now im recovering. I'm not a very well person either, I have a pretty bad metabolic condition that effects my growth and i get badly sick very often and i herd my dad being told that i cant expect a long healthy lifespan, so i think about death a LOT, but talking to people is the biggest help ever and i really hope u do :) let me know because i love to help :) Thinking of you

This post sent genuine tears rolling down my cheeks. Wishing Alex a very long life :cool: Love you fella ---> Daz :)

[deregisterme]

I've been talking a lot with the friend lately, but he makes me feel like i meant shit to mason and that he just wanted to get away from me.
i need to stop talking to him, he just makes me more and more sad and blames me for his death

This is someone you don't need. I've lost a friend too hat died in a car accident. I know the feeling of shock and pain - it is so unexpected. I just do not see how this person can blame you for your friends death. The sad fact of life is we do sometimes lose people that we care about all too early Please - remember the good times with your friend, you will never forget him,and that he would have wanted you to be happy in your life. If you have a tear in your ey, it's natural, we are all human. If you need to talk we are all here.

[DarkHorse4eva]

A lot of people told me "you don't know what you got, thill it's gone" but I knew exactly what I had with him, and I thanked him for it everyday. I am grateful for every second I had with him

[MortimerB]

Goddag, fellow dane. My most sincere condolences and best of luck to both you and your friend's family and mates! And I think I know how you feel. While I was in Flensburg with my class - a trip where 50 percent of the pupils got sick - my granddad dies. I came home, exhausted from the virus-thingy, my dad told my grandfather had died. And my world sorta collapsed before my eyes. I litterally saw cracks and cried the remainder of that evening. And even though I was in flipping Germany, I managed to cast blame on myself...
I think it's a biological selfdefense mechanism that has been developed through nature to avoid such situations again, if your own missteps through - though this mechanism may also lead to personal blame.
Too long, didn't read - it's not your fault, and the pain and self-blame will pass, though your life and perspective might be changed for a while, if not forever. I wish you the best of luck and hope that this will provide a bit of consolation.