A supposed to be book

[Versae]

I'm writing a book and I don't know if I should continue it or not so I want to ask you guys if I should. Here's a sneak peek.


"I've given up on writing long ago" I said.

___ asked me why I stopped writing, I didn't know what to answer. I was afraid of that question, afraid that it may unravel something I'm escaping from.

It was a beautiful morning back then, when it all happened. The sky was as beautiful as it ever was. Vomiting those serene colors and mouth-watering clouds, I stared at it from my window a really long time before brushing teeth. Everything was going quite well, I have a great school, an awesome family and a beautiful life. But still, I have this feeling that this wasn't quite right, like I never belonged here, like there's something that I've forgotten that no one had made me remember.

And after that deafening sound inside my head, I crashed at the bathroom floor, still brushing my teeth. Unable to move any limb, there were images in my head but it was all vague. Then I went into a deep sleep. Unable to remember anything that happened.


So yeah, what'd you think?

[glad0s]

There were a few grammatical and contextual errors, but other than that I liked it a lot :). A few recommendation is in the first paragraph, perhaps it should say "I didn't know how to answer"? By using "what", it makes it seem as if there was more than one question.

But other than that, it was really good :). Keep on writing!

[sqishy]

Very interesting. Not sure about the syntax, but go ahead with it yes. Nice cliffhanger for us as well :P .

[Matt_97]

I liked it, great description and i liked the starting point :) now for the negative, there were a few grammatical errors, you changed the grammatical tense a few times by using present tense verbs ( "i have" you used instead of "i had" ) but having but had the rest of it in the past participle (using words like "asked" and "was"). I did like it and with a bit of work it could be very good :D

[DorkimusPrime]

I need more! I have to know what happened!

[audiophile5]

Certainly, nice cliffhanger! You should keep writing.

[ArtemisLianCrock]

Loved it, apart from the vomiting reference. The rest of it is great, though.