Log in

View Full Version : Death of a Loved One


Brice
November 20th, 2013, 09:45 PM
On October 28th this year, my best friend died in a car accident. She was my only friend I could tell anything and the only person who made me feel anything more. We had plans for both our futures and we sang together and went to church together and I love her to death. So that's what's happened, here's my issue. Well, more like issues. As in, more than one.
I have nothing left. Nothing to live for. I promised her I'd never cut or anything like that, and I'll hold that promise until I die, but I don't know how to express my grief. For the last year, my lifes purpose has been to make her happy and to keep her smiling and make her see the light in the darkest situations. She's gone, I have no friends, and I can't talk to my family. I'll never have closure. At the funeral, my choir sang and I thought it was the perfect way to honor her. Problem with that is, the director changed the song last minute and I didn't know it. I lost my chance to sing for her before I never saw her again. I feel like I'm suffocating and every smile and laugh feels fake and music is still something I love but it saddens me. Now, I feel like she's still here. Like I could look over my shoulder and she'll be there. I feel her presence in everything. I still talk to her, as crazy as that sounds. But she's gone, and even though I know that, I still look for her and disappoint myself because she's not there. I'm now easily angered. I'm not sure what to do now. I don't know how to live, what to live for, or what exactly I'm supposed to do here without her. I feel panicked because I think what if I was a bad influence on her and she's being punished? I find myself hoping that I'll be able to see her sooner rather than later. If anyone can tell me anything to help with any of this, I'd greatly appreciate it.

Kid0809
November 20th, 2013, 10:11 PM
Maybe you should go see her grave and sing to her what you want to to get some closure and believe that she would want you to live and move on with life

HeyMrsTambourine
November 21st, 2013, 06:59 AM
She served as a light to you (and you did the same) and now she's gone, you've lost your bearings. There will be a long way to go before your pain heals, but I promise you'll get better in time because it always does !

But your life isn't ruined/destroyed, you don't have to rebuild it. You just have to accept and slowly "fill" the gaping void she left in it. Now look, it doesn't mean she's not a part of your life anymore because she's alive through your love. It means you'll find new activites which bring you joy, new good friends (please don't harden your heart to others : there are plenty of great people on Earth !) and a new meaning to your life.

Fiction
November 21st, 2013, 07:11 AM
It sounds like the two of you where exceptionally close, closer than a lot of people eve get to experience in their life. The pain of loosing her is just as strong as the love you had for her. I don't mean to be cliche but it's better to have loved and lost than never loved at all right?

What you had was beautiful and should be appreciated. How about trying to make a scrapbook or something of pictures or items that remind you of the good times together? Don't think about how it ended only what you had at the time.

Greiving is a horrible thing, but it needs to occur for it to stop.

Brice
November 23rd, 2013, 08:39 PM
Thank y'all. Y'all all sound like nice people and I appreciate what y'all's help

Katiya
November 24th, 2013, 12:14 AM
I'm so sorry for your loss! :'( that sounds just awful! I've never had anyone close yo me like that ever. I can't imagine how it must feel!

I know one thing. It will take time, lots of time to heal. Everyone grieves differently and no one wah is right or wrong.

Brinkley25
November 25th, 2013, 02:01 AM
Well i Really appreciate this post. It’s hard to sort the good from the bad sometimes, but I think you’ve nailed it!