XNonsensicalX
October 29th, 2013, 02:20 AM
I cannot sleep at my mom's apartment anymore (or any apartment, for that matter)
I have been completely unable to get any sleep since the building behind me burned down, after a resident misplaced a cigarette on the balcony of the second floor. The whole building was trashed and everybody lost everything there. Thankfully, everyone survived.
I walk by the gutted building, and see how much water/fire damage was done to the second floor interior and exterior. Nothing was unscathed, and what was especially upsetting was the face that the person who started it lived in the same unit (8) in their building as I do in mine. Their furniture setup was the same as mine, and there were many other similarities (smokers on all floors, one of them being my mother) and I'm losing my mind over this.
If I want to get sleep, I have to go to my dad's house. Sometimes he grates on my nerves, but I cannot sleep anywhere else for fear of setting a building on fire accidentally and displacing 14 people. It doesn't make any sense, because I'm not a smoker and I was already really careful about this. My mom uses an ashtray and I check the stove frequently.
Its gotten to a point where I fell asleep while working (thankfully the customer was counting out 20 of the same item slowly and loudly, I woke up at 18 of them) as I was up for 34 hours straight and my coworkers have been facebook messaging me because they were concerned that I was overly stressed.
I have tried to sleep, knowing that what I'm doing is ridiculous. Every time I lie down and close my eyes, I smell smoke and my heart starts pounding.
I'd express my concern with someone IRL, but I feel like that would prompt a discussion about divorce and maladjustment but the issues are beginning to outweigh the benefits seeing as I've settled on ≤8 hours of sleep every other night for the past 2 months. I do know that I have to confront this before my parents find out and I get an uncomfortable "is it because you prefer your mom/dad instead me?"
I have been completely unable to get any sleep since the building behind me burned down, after a resident misplaced a cigarette on the balcony of the second floor. The whole building was trashed and everybody lost everything there. Thankfully, everyone survived.
I walk by the gutted building, and see how much water/fire damage was done to the second floor interior and exterior. Nothing was unscathed, and what was especially upsetting was the face that the person who started it lived in the same unit (8) in their building as I do in mine. Their furniture setup was the same as mine, and there were many other similarities (smokers on all floors, one of them being my mother) and I'm losing my mind over this.
If I want to get sleep, I have to go to my dad's house. Sometimes he grates on my nerves, but I cannot sleep anywhere else for fear of setting a building on fire accidentally and displacing 14 people. It doesn't make any sense, because I'm not a smoker and I was already really careful about this. My mom uses an ashtray and I check the stove frequently.
Its gotten to a point where I fell asleep while working (thankfully the customer was counting out 20 of the same item slowly and loudly, I woke up at 18 of them) as I was up for 34 hours straight and my coworkers have been facebook messaging me because they were concerned that I was overly stressed.
I have tried to sleep, knowing that what I'm doing is ridiculous. Every time I lie down and close my eyes, I smell smoke and my heart starts pounding.
I'd express my concern with someone IRL, but I feel like that would prompt a discussion about divorce and maladjustment but the issues are beginning to outweigh the benefits seeing as I've settled on ≤8 hours of sleep every other night for the past 2 months. I do know that I have to confront this before my parents find out and I get an uncomfortable "is it because you prefer your mom/dad instead me?"