A Bag of Woes

[InneedofaJob97]

10th grade male
It seems i've never really been involved with a girl and it causes this or maybe its that i only want something when i can't have it. Whenever i think i start to like a girl and i see any sign of her liking me back, even if it is imagined by my vanity, my subconcious decides i'm too good for her. I feel err.. socially retarded.

(shifting more to highschool social life in general now)

I'm even sort of in with the "cool crowd" but only because i'm best friends with one of the main guys since child hood. I just don't understand how to be social, if i'm comfortable in a situation I can suddenly be funny and sometimes even flirty with a girl but with guys or girls i'm not comfortable with I just freeze up and its awkward. Its worse because of myspace, i get on and all the people i know have all the "ohmygawd you look so cute baby! <3" comments from girls on their pictures and I just don't want to play myspace tag anymore. The worst part for me is i'm a very socially needy person! When i don't talk to someone my age for a few days i start going crazy but its very hard for me to make new friends and keep some of the old ones.

I guess all my "problems" may seem petty to you, hell they even seem pretty petty to me but they hurt me emotionally and i really wish high school was over and that i could grow a pair and start talking to that girl in Spanish 2.

Thanks for your time
Roger

[Kaleidoscope Eyes]

So just talk to her. You seem to have a lack of self-confidence, and talking to people outside your comfort zone may help with that. They'll talk to you, and you'll realize that it's ok to branch out a bit. Don't think of her as a potential mating partner just yet, think of her as a potential friend. Get to know her, let her get to know you. Talk to her a bit in Spanish class, like before the bell rings if you're both in there a bit early during passing period. Just walk up to her on your way to your seat and introduce yourself, ask her name, maybe make small talk about how difficult/easy the last night's homework was. When the bell rings, go to your seat and continue with class as usual. That way you get to say hi, she notices you, but there's no pressure to keep up a conversation since you'll only have a few minutes. Then, whenever you pass her in the hall, make eye contact and smile a bit, maybe wave, and say hi. Use her name. But don't stop and chat, you've got class to get to, just let her know you notice her. And then you can gradually start talking more in class, or you can stop to talk a bit during nutrition break, and once its normal for you two to talk a bit, after a week or two, ask if she wants to hang after school or on the weekend. Try to work together if you have a project in Spanish. You'll be friends in no time.