Little brother depressed, please help

[Night Dolphin]

Hi, I'm looking for people out there who have been diagnosed with depression for advice on how to make sure my twelve year old brother is comfortable and help him manage his depression. He's been diagnosed with PBD, which is a childhood form of bipolar- or manic depression and I'm trying my hardest but I never know whether he wants me there, needs me there or just wants and needs me to go away.

Our mum killed herself two years ago, when I was twelve and he was ten. He was the one who found her and since he's gone from a sweet, happy boy to constantly locking himself away and hiding. He rarely eats and is getting paler by the day, he's started talking to me but won't talk to our dad because he unfairly blames my dad, who argued with my mum on the night before we found her. I'm confused by his annoyance with dad but not me because I also argued with mum on that night and the last thing I said to her was 'I don't care what you think, just go away and leave me alone.' which makes me hate myself more than I can put into words.

Anyway, back to the point, when you're experiencing a particularly bad spell of depression how do you want people to act around you? Do you like them to be calm, act like normal, spend more or less time with you? Do you like them to tell jokes or would you rather they spoke seriously with you? He also struggles with sleep but I'm reluctant to give him sleeping tablets so wondering about tips any of you could give to him?

I'm sorry to almost feast on your illness, and I hope you all find ways to overcome what you're experiencing but please, please could you help me to help my brother because I think if I lost him too it would completely tear my father and I to pieces.

Thanks in advance,

Anna x

[thewhiteyeezus]

Basically make sure he knows you care but dont get all up in his business, like dont ask him too many questions or talk too much just keep it simple not enough people do this

[Fanta_Lover44]

Just be there for him when he needs you, don't just barge in with questions and try keep a normal ish routine. Hope this helps.

[Stryker125]

He really just needs to know that you love him, and that you're there for him. I've been dealing with depression for a while now, and therapy and medication helps a lot. As well as really good friends and lots of love. Sometimes he might really want to talk, but he just can't seem to get it out, and sometimes he may just need to be alone for a while to process his feelings...so he may end up giving you mixed signals about whether he wants you there or not. I know how that is, and it's just as frustrating for us as it is to the people trying to help us and talk to us. Does he have any hobbies or things he likes to do? Maybe you could try just hanging out with him and doing something with him to let him know you're there for him. As far as sleep goes, I don't know exactly what his issue is, but I've been taking melatonin before I wanna go to bed, and it helps me to wind down and stuff. I hope this helped a little