Family troubles and stuff

[Ryhanna]

Well, I'm not even sure what I'm going to type. I think all I want to do is vent.

Long story short, I have a brother (half-brother), who I have never met. I know that he exists, but he has no idea that he has a brother. Even though we've never met, and I barely even know what he looks like and he has no idea that I exist, I still love him, you know? Like, he's my family, whether we know each other or not.

Anyway, I was looking at my younger cousin's Facebook profile, and I noticed that he's friends with my brother. Neither of them know that we're brothers, and I don't think they know each other very well. They're around the same age, and I'm 3 years older. It just made me sad and bitter to see that they were friends, you know? I'm jealous. My cousin knows my brother and I've never even met him. Hell, I might never meet him. Hell, my brother and I have like 17 mutual friends.

Is it okay for me to feel this way? I don't think his mother would want me to meet him. From what I know, he doesn't even know he has a brother. Any chance I have of getting to meet him and build a real relationship would have to wait until he's an adult. I just feel so awful knowing that I have a brother, and all of these people can be a part of his life but I can't.

[Living For Love]

You need to have in mind that he can react very badly if he finds out that he has an older brother. I don't think you need to feel jealous about other people knowing him and you not, but you guys definitely have the right to know eachother.

Perhaps you can talk to your parents and tell them you want to know him, so you could all arrange a meeting and talk with eachother. Or, if you trust your cousin that much, you could tell him the truth and ask him for his advice. Just be ready for your brother's reaction when he founds out about you.

[Ryhanna]

Yeah, I know. And I'm scared of how he might react, especially seeing as our father isn't a good man. He spent far more time with our father than I did, so I'm worried that knowing that I exist just won't be good for him. I don't want to push anything.

I'm also worried that it could go the other way and he could resent me for knowing for so long and not trying to meet him. Either way, I think I should just leave it up to his mother. If she wants to tell him, then that's fine. If he finds out and wants to meet me, then I will.

I just can't help but feel like I'm missing out on something.