holy bad breakup.

[Fiending_the_freedom]

Yea so,
i broke up with my boyfriend of 4 months.
worst.breakup.EVER.

like i've had bad.
but this.
wow.

i did it over the phone because i was worried that he wouldn't let me leave/do it if i said it in person.
so i'm gonna give you the short version, because i'm way too lazy.

i broke up with him for a few different reasons.
1. when i was with him, i had never been ahppier, he made me so happy. our relatonship was pretty good seeing as it was getting better because he was learning not to be so clingy.
but everytime i wasnt with him, i felt like i wanted to break up with him. i dont know how to explain it. but anyways, i've always felt like that, from the start, and i figured, if i STILL had those doubts after 4 months, and they wont go away, its unfair to him and me to still be with him.

2. he like's me an obbsesive amount. liek the breakup he kept saying "i dont want to live without you, making you happy is all i want to do, i can help you with these doubts, how could you do this to me? we can fix this. i know even if its years you'll relize what you left and come back to me, i'll wait for you. "

3. it wouldnt have worked out anyways because he was looking for something different (he said when i was talking to him as i was going to break up with him "i know we can acually last, we could be togheter for years") lol i'm 16, i'm not going to be with someone for years, i hardley know myself yet.

i mean he was so in love with me he didn't care about himself. he needs to be able to be on his own before he is with someone eles.
it was so hard. he came over right after i broke up with him, came in crying. sat there for an hour crying and begging me to take him back (this guy isnt one to be like this, like he's like 6'2 and a hockey player) he called me more than 20 times the day after begging me to take him back. i feel so badm but like i cant lie to myself just to prevent his pain you know?
but like, i'd rather be in a mediocer (sp?) relaitonship where i'm 100% i love the guy and no matter what i want to be iwth him that be in a GREAT relationship but just not feel it.

[Camazotz]

Your heart is in the right place. You dont want to hurt his feelings. But if you dont feel attracted to him, the break-up is good. He needs to learn it's okay to be alone, and it's just one relationship. He seems too clingy, try to be his friend, but dont let him get the thought it could go again.

[RepliKate]

I've sort of been in a relationship like this before myself. It really hurts to have to break someone's heart, but you can't stay in a relationship in which you aren't happy. Also, leading him on wouldn't have been right, you made the right choice here. He's probably going to be hurting a lot for a while, but even that is still better than leading him on for his sake, at the expense of your own happiness. While this may really suck atm, you did the right thing for you. :hug:

[Gumleaf]

i agree with the others. sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind. and the longer you leave these things the worse they get. you did the right thing.

[Hyper]

i mean he was so in love with me he didn't care about himself. he needs to be able to be on his own before he is with someone else

Yep you did the right thing, good luck!

[ScotsGirl]

I hope you and him are both alright. :) I guess the only thing you can do now is give him time?
You probably have done already but, he seems like he might think you'll get back together at some point. It might be an idea to keep reminding him what the deal is...in a as-nice-as-you-can way... :eyebrow:


but everytime i wasnt with him, i felt like i wanted to break up with him. i dont know how to explain it.

Oh god...I think I know this feeling. Did you think about how you would break up with him when you next saw him? Did you find you didnt think like that at all when you were with him, only when you werent with him?

xxx

[Fiending_the_freedom]

Did you think about how you would break up with him when you next saw him? Did you find you didnt think like that at all when you were with him, only when you werent with him?

xxx

Yea exactly