Telling a (potentially straight) friend that you like him?

[Axw_JD]

So I am kind of in a moral dilemma right now... I think I really like my best friend in more of a romantic way and idk how to really deal with it... I want to come clean and tell him, but I don't want our friendship to be ruined... without him I honestly don't really have anything left...

He already knows I am gay, and I have no idea if he likes boys at all (my guess is he doesn't) but I know that if I don't ask, I will never stop wondering "what if...". Any advice, tips, personal experience? This is very important to me as I believe honesty is always the best foundation for friendships and relationships alike, but I am scared of his reaction.

[Mynick]

Bring the topic out, try to check if he likes boys or girls, if he likes girls just don't tell him. It would ruin your friendship for nothing.
If he likes boys i guess you could talk with him.

[Axw_JD]

I have been trying to do that but he is really reserved with that kind of stuff. I honestly have no way to tell if he is straight, gay or bi, I have just been assuming straight because is the safe thing to do....

[Mynick]

I have been trying to do that but he is really reserved with that kind of stuff. I honestly have no way to tell if he is straight, gay or bi, I have just been assuming straight because is the safe thing to do....
Uhm maybe you could ask a friend to say 'Hey isn't that girl hot?' when you are next to him and see how he reacts?

[kylem1229]

Just ask him if he likes boys or not. If he doesnt, then you can still remain friends with him, you will just have to stop your "relationship". The only way that I can see it ruining your friendship, is that if he says he doesnt like boys, and you keep trying to get him to, that's what will ruin it. Asking shouldn't affect your friendship.

[TheBigUnit]

beat around the bush cuz to tell you the truth this might ruin your friendship

[sqishy]

Asking him what he thinks his sexuality is is a direct way to get somewhere. It might make things awkward for him, but it might also make him think that maybe you like him. It's a start.

[Camazotz]

I would advise against it. It would make the entire relationship awkward if you showed romantic interest, and if you really mean what you said about him being your only friend, you don't want to jeopardize that. You'll get over him eventually, just try to let it pass.

[steellord321]

It's easy to say don't do it but you won't stop thinking of it...until you find another romantic interest. That's a follow up too, if he says no, what will you do then? You can't stay in love with a str8 guy forever.

[Abyssal Echo]

I was in a similar situation not to long ago it was eating me alive all I could think of was him. ugh part of it was his fault because of some of the things he said. I finally told him how I felt. I kinda got friend zoned by him. I feel better now that its out and we are still friends. I would talk to him.

[LiamC]

If any part of you thinks he's straight, don't. I'm in pretty much the same position (except my crush is deffo straight), I want to scream it at him whenever I'm with him and although I know he'll be fine with it in the same way he's been really supportive that I'm gay, I just think that it wouldn't change anything and I'll still want him badly but not be able to have him. I think the only way it can have any benefit is if he's gay too and it leads to something, but that's just my view!

[Luminous]

I was in a similar situation, I asked anonymously on ask.fm if she would consider dating a girl or ever got feelings for a girl, she said no way I'm completely straight. It broke my heart but I'm getting over it. I still think about her and dream about her a lot. I also told her how I feel- or felt- without any indication of who I am or gender, and that made me feel a lot better.

[teen.jpg]

Leave it alone. If he's straight, he just wants to be friends. And if you tell him your feelings, it WILL change your friendship, whether you want it to or not.

[Second Chance]

So I am kind of in a moral dilemma right now... I think I really like my best friend in more of a romantic way and idk how to really deal with it... I want to come clean and tell him, but I don't want our friendship to be ruined... without him I honestly don't really have anything left...

He already knows I am gay, and I have no idea if he likes boys at all (my guess is he doesn't) but I know that if I don't ask, I will never stop wondering "what if...". Any advice, tips, personal experience? This is very important to me as I believe honesty is always the best foundation for friendships and relationships alike, but I am scared of his reaction.

Since your friend already knows your gay, then at least half the battle is over for you since he accepts your sexuality and wants to be your friend. At this point he since he knows you like other guys he probably will not be shocked if you like your friend more than a friend.

Since this is your best friend we're talking about chances are you two are pretty close and are open with each other about everything. I would be open with your feelings and make it clear that if he does not feel the same way that you respect his sexuality just like he respects yours. Especially since your friend knows your gay I doubt he'll freak out, and the worst that could happen is that your friend could tell you that he just wants to be your friend and nothing more. I suppose there is no harm in your asking the friend especially if he's single. However, if you friend makes it clear that he wants to be your friend and not go beyond that, then make sure your not crushing on him and respect his sexuality just like he seems to respect yours.