so. not sure what to say/do

[ezekialar]

I have liked this girl for about a year on and off. and this year i just moved to the same school as her this year and i like her a lot more then i ever did. about 2 weeks ago she said she liked me.

She says she likes me a lot and we hang out together a lot and we act like were going out even tho we're not, but she tells me that she wants to go out with me but doesnt want a relationship. i feel that she just doesnt wanna have the responsibility of actually going out and not being able to flirt with other guys all the time. which bothers me because she always acts like were goin out when were hangin out and stuff then when we get to places where a lot of other people are she doesnt flirt with me or talk to me as much.

We went to my high school basketball game last night and this kid TJ walked over...and the same thing happened last night ans everytime he's around...she stopped talking to me completely and turned away from me and started talkin to him and other people and didnt have anything to do with me.

I talked to her last night about it and told her that i was pissed and she said she understood why and then we started talkin about what we wanted to do. i said i didnt wanna just sit here goin around in circles waiting for u to stop liking me or for something more to happen between us. and she also said she would stop doin that crap with TJ and stuff. but i went to look at his myspace a minute ago to post a comment i saw they had been commenting each other and she asked him if he wanted to hang out tmrw and stuff. so im not sure what to do...i obviously like this girl a lot, and i feel like i cant say too much cuz were not actually goin out. i also feel like she's gonna thnk i've just ben reading their comments if i say something about it. should i say something or..?

[Kaleidoscope Eyes]

I wouldn't say anything. Watch how she is with other guys and if she keeps her promise of not flirting with other guys so much. Remember though, she can talk to a guy without wanting a relationship with him. She could have asked TJ to hang out in just a friendly way. If that's the case she'll think you're overreacting if you bring it up all pissy-like. The last thing a girl wants is to feel like a guy is getting possessive. You have the right to feel like you want her to yourself as far as romantic relationships goes, but remember that you aren't officially in a relationship, just in a state of mutual interest. She says she doesn't want a relationship. Have you asked her why? If it looks like it won't blossom into a relationship between the two of you, I think things need to be clear. She can't just keep jerking you around, leaving you constantly hoping that today is the day she'll say that she only wants to be with you. You deserve to know if that's not likely to happen, so you can clear your mind of the idea that you're in a relationship, and open your mind to the idea of a relationship with another girl. That's not to say you can't still be friends with this girl, or that you can't still have feelings for her. You just need to know what to expect. Remember that if things don't work out (which, I'm sorry, but it sounds to me like what you said: she just wants to flirt with everyone and not be tied back), you can't really keep telling her not to flirt with other guys. You can tell her it bothers you, but she gets to choose whether or not she listens. I know it sucks, but that's how people are.

Good luck, I hope things work out well. :)

[Camazotz]

Sounds like you want a relationship, she doesnt want the responsibility of one. She wants to be with other guys. Ask her on a date, and tell her how you feel. If she still wants to be with TJ or other guys, just let her go.