Parents saying no to loked doors or closed doors in the home?

[Lovelife090994]

Hi, do you agree that children regardelss of age, regardless should never be allowed to close or lock their doors in their parent's home.

Why do I ask? In many households children and teenage children are not allowed to lock or close their doors because many parents feel the child is hiding something or if like my mom, "You are under my roof, the doors stay open."

I came from an extremely strict household and thus I never did much after all the punishment and death threats and other threats mixed with the fact of being sent off to my dad if I acted bad. You?

My mom was so close to removing my door and everything but the bed from my room because I failed a test back Elementary, it wasn't until high school that she accepted that I was not a Straight-A student. (crazy I know)

Now if you are like me you are very old-fashioned and maybe a little unflexible from those ways but what do you think?
Is privacy a given or should children basically never get privacy until they earn it? Why or why not?

Do you agree with this? I do and don't, for punishment like my mom if severe remove the door altogether, and maybe no locking during the teen years but I don't know. You?

[sqishy]

Privacy is earned

[Lovelife090994]

Privacy is earned

Interesting, my mom in some ways feels the same but not enough so to enforce it for sme reason. Care to say why you feel or so or if your house works like this? I am only asking here.

[Cygnus]

I believe privacy is earned, if you can prove that you won't do bad stuff or anything like that while your bedroom door is locked then its okay.

[Lovelife090994]

I believe privacy is earned, if you can prove that you won't do bad stuff or anything like that while your bedroom door is locked then its okay.

Yay! Old fashioned parenting and views101! I agree, I someone don't but I do because although I am not a bad kid I can be a bit odd sometimes and I think some teens may not be as trustworthy as they should.

[sqishy]

Interesting, my mom in some ways feels the same but not enough so to enforce it for sme reason. Care to say why you feel or so or if your house works like this? I am only asking here.

Along the lines of Cygnus David.

In my household my bedroom has no lock and it's hard to close it, but my parents ask to come in if I'm in there.

[Lovelife090994]

Along the lines of Cygnus David.

In my household my bedroom has no lock and it's hard to close it, but my parents ask to come in if I'm in there.

My mother doesn't ask, she just comes in. She is trying to knock now all of a sudden...

[sqishy]

Well in my eyes her actions are not justified. Firstly, you're 19..... age in itself should be giving you privacy.

[Lovelife090994]

Well in my eyes her actions are not justified. Firstly, you're 19..... age in itself should be giving you privacy.

Yeah, I believe that is why she is knocking now. I respect the fact that i am in my mother's home though. I will be starting college soon anyway.

[Luminous]

I close my door, and don't lock it. My parents have never had a problem with that, and they always just come in and not knock. It's not a big deal for me, I make sure not to be doing anything.. private.. during the time of day they might come in.

[britishboy]

its up to to the parents, if your irresponsible, you should be closely supervised and discipled

[Rexster]

mine has a lock and i use it sometimes. with 3 jerk older brothers it pays. but dad doesn't care as long as it is unlocked before we go to sleep.

[teen.jpg]

Not when you share a room ..

[BebeFleur.]

I say that privacy is earned. You are under your parents roof, you need to abide by their rules. If you are caught not following the rules, I think your parents have the right to tell you you can't lock or close your doors (for an extended period of time).

[Miri]

I don't even have a lock on my door, let alone on the bathroom door on the upstairs floor where all the bedrooms are.
We have gotten used to knocking in my family, and my parents respect our privacy, unless we do something to put doubt in their minds. A couple years ago my brother Sebastian got caught smoking weed by my parents, and they made him leave his bedroom door wide open and submit to backpack checks on a daily basis for a couple months.

[Sugaree]

I was always taught that privacy is earned in a household setting. While, yes, privacy is definitely something many people want, it is not necessarily something you always NEED. However, it is always something you earn when you live with others. This is especially true if you're still living with your parents, like many people.

[Walter Powers]

Privacy is earned, to a point. You should have to earn you parents trust to shut the door for extended periods of time, but you should always be allowed to do it when your changing!

[SosbanFach]

I'm of the opinion that privacy ought to be respected unless there are doubts regarding the abuse of this privacy. By this I mean that, somewhere between it being earned and being 'a given', a child ought, from an age where he or she is deemed mature enough to handle it, to have their personal privacy considered (including, as in the example, the closure of doors) as a 'default', but should not consider it to be a 'right' so much as a privilege.

[Jake the Cake]

Something my best friend's mom does no learn is people need privacy. She's walked in on him changing so many times, and she always gets mad at him for having his door closed, but each time it's because he's changing. Then she gets mad that he didnt tell her first. She's very intrusive and actually openly believes that a child should no have any privacy from the parent, which is why nobody ever goes there anymore. It's also why nobody hangs out with him at school by the beginning or end of the day. Parents like her who act like their child isnt allowed to have any personal thoughts or anything is baaaaaaaaaaaaaaad.

[Hollywood]

In a sense, I agree that privacy is earned. A parent needs to trust you to give you privacy. If you're notorious for doing bad shit, then your parent has a right to be hesitant to let you have total privacy.

But if you're just a normal kid, parents taking out doors and removing locks is wrong. I, for one, close all doors behind me and lock my bedroom door at night. But I've never done anything to cause that to be an issue.