Can people report abuse if it's been years since the abuse?

[Silent Tears]

Can people report abuse if it's been years since the abuse stopped happening? Or, if the abused child is now an adult? I ask this, because I choose not to tell anyone about what's happened to me, unless it's to late for any charges to be made. I don't want to have to deal with any legal issues, I don't care about putting my abuser behind bars. I do want to speak out, and stop hiding, though. If that makes any sense.

So, when is it to late for someone to report abuse? The abuse would be sexual abuse. By a family member.

Also, how can I get the courage to talk about it? Because, I have someone who would understand. She was abused by her father, so she would be the easiest to talk to... I'm just afraid. Not because I'm afraid I'll get hurt. But, I still care about the person who hurt me. I don't want to care about him. I know he is suicidal, and if I tell someone, they will confront him. And, if he kills himself over guilt, I will blame myself for a very long time. I don't know that I can handle that. I just... It's very confusing. I wish I could turn my feelings off ._. Everyone here, keeps saying I should tell someone. But, it's not that simple.

[1_21Guns]

It's not to late, many cases of abuse have only just emerged years and years later because very few have the courage or even ability to seek help until later on. While like most things it is better to report it straight away, that doesn't mean you can't report it now.
You have someone you can talk to about it, so you've clearly been considering talking? I know talking about things you'd rather not is far from simple but once it's out you'll feel a lot better, you're carrying a massive burden on your shoulders. Would the person who would understand confront the person that hurt you?

[Silent Tears]

It's not to late, many cases of abuse have only just emerged years and years later because very few have the courage or even ability to seek help until later on. While like most things it is better to report it straight away, that doesn't mean you can't report it now.
You have someone you can talk to about it, so you've clearly been considering talking? I know talking about things you'd rather not is far from simple but once it's out you'll feel a lot better, you're carrying a massive burden on your shoulders. Would the person who would understand confront the person that hurt you?

Yes, she probably would confront him. Or, she would tell her bf, and he would confront him. Most likely, both of them would.

[1_21Guns]

Yes, she probably would confront him. Or, she would tell her bf, and he would confront him. Most likely, both of them would.

Hmm, well I understand your predicament but you do know if he did kill himself that would be by no means your fault don't you? I know you say you'd feel guilty but you know not a single bit of it would be your fault?

[Silent Tears]

Hmm, well I understand your predicament but you do know if he did kill himself that would be by no means your fault don't you? I know you say you'd feel guilty but you know not a single bit of it would be your fault?

It's just difficult, because he's come close to committing suicide before and I felt like it was my fault, and I drive people to that. With things that have been said in the past, I know I would blame myself. I know I shouldn't, but I would. I don't know... just have to think it over a while. Thanks, though.

[Emily15_xoxo]

You should let everyone know, no charges need to be made unless you want to, which you just stated you didn't want to. It's important people know about it

[Katiya]

No its not too late. Its never too late. By all means do tell. And if your worried about your father you could inform who you tell that he is suicidal and needs to be detained where he cant hurt him self. Im guessing though he knows what he did wrong and feels pretty bad about it. Alot of people who do those kinds of things do regret it and know they are messed up. I bet thats why he is suicidal.

If you dont want to tell thats ok. But do make sure he isnt abusing anyone else to your knowlege. Ie if you know or suspect hes hurting someone else do tell. If that were the case i would tell for their sake. Sonds like he learnt his lesson already.

But what ever happens its not your fault. You need to know there isnt anything you can do to change what another being decides to do. I know you may feel guilt for a long time but try and know its not your fault because its really not.