Mom and Girlfriend

[hipster101]

So, this is an odd topic...and very touchy in my opinion. My girlfriend is as far as we know 16, however according to foster care, paperwork got messed up and stuff happened where her current family thinks and is convinced she is 14. According to her, and what she knows, she is a 16 year old who is supposed to be in grade eleven but because the paperwork and stuff got messed up she is technically a 16 year old in grade 9, however her family thinks she is a 14 year old in grade 9. Make any sense? Continuing on to the more complex side of the story. My mom doesn't believe she is 16...I do...as she doesn't in any way look 14 and not to mention I trust her. In my province (I live in Canada), someone of the age 14-15 can give legal sexual consent to a person 5 years older than them, however an 18 year old can not have sexual intercourse with someone younger than 16. I am 17, and if she is in fact 14, only three years difference. I turn 18 in January, thus we cannot have sex for a year and a half considering her birthday is in July. How do I talk to my mom about this fact that she is 16, and she is telling the truth, and that though we have had sex (won't be telling her that part), until I am 18 we legally can and it isn't statutory rape, as my mom said it is. And anyway, we're going to stop having sex and focus more on us a couple for a bit before I go to University (5 hours away from here). Mom and I have an open relationship and good relationship, but I don't know...

[James Bond]

The only way to convince your mom would be to show her your girlfriends birth certificate. It really shouldn't be a huge problem or hassle, considering I could right now ask my mom for mine and shed easily be able to get it.

Of course you're going to believe your girlfriend, so it'd be hard for your mom to fully believe you and your girlfriend, a third party would probably be able to convince your mom more than you and your girlfriend could.

[byee]

Mark, there has to be either some official paperwork substantiating her age (like a birth certificate), or some documentation that the folks in social services are using to determine her age, this is pretty basic information.

If you're not sure, or if there is no proof, you shouldn't be doing anything sexual with her that puts either one of you at legal risk, regardless of how strongly you might want to do it. Likewise, given her history, you should also be aware of the potential for complicated emotional involvement that often results from a sexual relationship.

[Plasma]

So, this is an odd topic...and very touchy in my opinion. My girlfriend is as far as we know 16, however according to foster care, paperwork got messed up and stuff happened where her current family thinks and is convinced she is 14. According to her, and what she knows, she is a 16 year old who is supposed to be in grade eleven but because the paperwork and stuff got messed up she is technically a 16 year old in grade 9, however her family thinks she is a 14 year old in grade 9. Make any sense? Continuing on to the more complex side of the story. My mom doesn't believe she is 16...I do...as she doesn't in any way look 14 and not to mention I trust her. In my province (I live in Canada), someone of the age 14-15 can give legal sexual consent to a person 5 years older than them, however an 18 year old can not have sexual intercourse with someone younger than 16. I am 17, and if she is in fact 14, only three years difference. I turn 18 in January, thus we cannot have sex for a year and a half considering her birthday is in July. How do I talk to my mom about this fact that she is 16, and she is telling the truth, and that though we have had sex (won't be telling her that part), until I am 18 we legally can and it isn't statutory rape, as my mom said it is. And anyway, we're going to stop having sex and focus more on us a couple for a bit before I go to University (5 hours away from here). Mom and I have an open relationship and good relationship, but I don't know...

If all you have is her word saying that she is 16 and not legal paperwork, then no, nobody will believe you.