Older guy

[Brays123]

Ok so I'm in 7th grade and I'm secretly gay and in the closet (though I'm sure people can tell) and I have a huge crush on on this guy in 8th grade I play football with, I've already seen what he's packing and all that stuff, but I'm just not sure what to say. Also I really want to come out but my sister is in the same school as me but she's in high school.:confused:

[Harley Quinn]

P101 :arrow: Teen Sexuality

[Josh from SoCal]

Ok so I'm in 7th grade and I'm secretly gay and in the closet (though I'm sure people can tell) and I have a huge crush on on this guy in 8th grade I play football with, I've already seen what he's packing and all that stuff, but I'm just not sure what to say. Also I really want to come out but my sister is in the same school as me but she's in high school.:confused:

First, only come out when you are ready. As much as you think your sister has something to do with your decision, it doesn't. Your life is yours. Hopefully she supports you. But if not, that's her problem and not yours.

Second, the guy.... be very careful. If he is into you, then it's chill to talk to him about it. But this is a tricky area because if he is anti-gay or something, he could turn things around and make your life hell. Do you have any reason to think he likes you back?

[ksdnfkfr]

Don't be in a rush to came out. I'm waiting until college myself

With the guy maybe try starting out as just friends

[Brays123]

Well I sometimes look at him and he looks back and smiles at times, but then again I'm not sure if he's gay, curious, etc.

[ksdnfkfr]

If you become friends and get to know him that way, then you'll have a better idea.

[sqishy]

See what opinions this person you have feelings for has for LGBT stuff. If he is against it, it would not be a good idea to come out and/or say to him that you like him. Is he is fine with LGBT stuff, see if he likes you in any way more than friendship. Otherwise there is not really any way for a relationship to last, as it is only one way. If you plan to come out without telling him you like him, the only thing stopping you is yourself. Be prepared to take the consequences in regard to people's reactions to this.

Good luck! :)

[Thatimportantkid]

Find out if he's gay/bi etc. Im Bi & 13 message me & we can talk I've been in the same situation

[byee]

Braydon, I'm a little concerned by your choice of the word "Secret" to describe your sexuality. Most people associate "Secret" with "Bad" or "Wrong". Your sexuality is neither (regardless of what that is). Rather, it's private. As it should be (again, regardless of what that is). You wear a bathing suit for the same reason. I know I might be being too much of a wordsmith here, but if you really feel that you're keeping a "Secret", it's just going to potentially make it irresistible to reveal this, not so much b/c you (or your world) are ready for that, but just to unburden yourself.

Second, the easiest way to find out if some one is gay (or anything personal) is to get to know them as people, be his friend...do things that don't reveal your desires, but rather focus on all the other stuff that makes you who you are, maybe a common interest, maybe football? At puberty, it really doesn't take much time for people to reveal what their sexual preferences are.

Third, coming out is a very complex matter that usually has huge consequences, it's not something to be taken (or done) lightly. That's probably a very safe way of saying wait, at least for a time. Focus on all those other qualities that make you who you are, although the desire to share something as basic as your sexuality is understandable, it's not always best. Like wearing a bathing suit.

[Josh from SoCal]

well put, Sam.

[Brays123]

Well... I might just text him a bit :3 and see

[llwoahll]

First of all is this guy for sure straight or gay? And you should just come out but theres a possibility of kids bulliying u on ur team cause your gay but if your not ready dont come out

[Twilly F. Sniper]

Don't rush it. Even though I did come out when I was in 7th grade, it's not a hurry.

[Luminous]

If you want to come out then do it. I'm not sure why you're worried about your sister since if you're going to come out, family is the first step.
You need to be really careful with this guy. If he's not gay or is even homophobic, ESPECIALLY if he's popular he can totally make your life a living hell. Try and befriend him first and get to know him and his friends. Be extremely cautious.