My group of friends??

[pmm98]

Just so everyone knows, I'm a 15 yr. old straight guy.

I'm a sophomore in high school and I'm a sociable kid. I have a lot of friends but they aren't CLOSE friends they are mostly acquaintances or people that I'll see in school but not hangout with outside of school. I do also have a smaller group of friends that I hangout with on the weekends and what not and I get along with them very well. My best friends right now are two girls and two guys.

I'm writing this because my group of friends seems to be 85% girls. I honestly really am bothered by this. People have thought I was gay before because of it which I always thought was stupid, but that isn't really what bothers me. What makes me upset about it is that I don't wanna always be hanging out with mostly girls they don't understand me and we don't connect on the same level. I'm not sure why I have a difficult time making friends with guys but I do. Girls always seem to love me and gravitate to me but guys don't for some reason and I have troubles pushing myself into a group of them that I can hamgout with... my goal for high school has been to find a group of 4 or 5 best guy friends that I can take with me thru out my entire life and they won't ditch me after we all graduate.

I think a part of the reason why I have trouble making guy friends is because in the past a lot of guys talked shit about me and hurt my self esteem but I always had one bestfriend every year and it was always a guy but every single year that bestfriend would end up leaving me behind and finding a new group of friends to hangout with. I also never really had a typical father/son relationship with my dad and my mom babied me a lot. I was also super close with my older sister because my two older brothers are way older then me and weren't around as much. Most of my friends that have never left have been girls and I think that's why I am comfortable with some of them..? I don't wanna ditch all my girl friends all of a sudden because I have good times with some of them and have even gotten into good relationships with them before but I miss not having my dudes in my life that I can just do stupid shit with and can understand me the way girls cant... I'm doing track in Winter and Lacrosse in Spring in hopes that I can make more guy friends but I'm really not the biggest athlete and I'm not overly crazy about sports... any advice that anyone can give me???

Thanks for ur help

[fast8]

All i can say is just be urself u will make friends with guys it might not seem like it now it will happen

[Living For Love]

I think that, in our age, friendships arrive and then go away, if you know what I mean, and it's REALLY REALLY hard to find someone who won't ditch us after we move on with our lives. Perhaps we will only find true friends (whether they are boys or girls) in the future when we are adults and have our own careers and stuff.

This is just a curiosity that I remembered when you said that people considered you gay because you only had girl friends. I once read that the ""normal"" thing to happen during our childhood is that, when we're younger (5-13 y/o), we will probably have more girl friends that boy friends and as we grow, that will eventually change, and we will have more boy friends than girl friends in the end of our teenaging process. This didn't really happened to me, in fact, in happened exactly the opposite way, but I think that each of us is unique so I guess you don't need to worry too much about not having male friends, or letting that define your sexuality in any way.

Throughout my life, I've had groups of friends formed only by girls or groups of friends formed only by boys, I don't think I've been able to befriend boys and girls at the same time in the same way. However, I noticed that I would get along better with guys than with girls. I know what you're feeling at the moment. There are some things in our life that we feel comfortable to discuss only with males, things that only us boys understand. At the moment, I just only have a small group of girls to which I connect, but I don't consider them my friends.

I'm not a very sociable person, but anyway, my advice is that you keep your friend girls and try to start conversation with guys the way you start with girls. I guess you'll just eventually find some nice dudes to hang out with.

[pmm98]

@Ryanair I hear what you're saying for sure, I think girls like me so much because I was raised in a very old fashioned family. My parents always taught me to be loyal, understanding and friendly to EVERYONE. Not just other guys my age but also girls. My dad was never one of those dads that sat down and watched football and drank beer in his free time. He was always an outdoorsy kinda guy and always had us in the woods. My point being, he wasn't that typical "macho" man. He taught me to be a man by taking care of my family and being self confident rather than watching football with the guys. My dad did have his own guy friends, but he was very confident in the fact that he didn't match the stereotypes some people put on men.

I think this in some ways affected the way I make friends with other guys because I feel a key point that most guys connect on is sports, which I could give a shit about. Also, any guy will agree, that guys and girls think very very differently. I've hung out with plenty of girls and I still 0% understand females. You have to approach friendships with girls and guys very differently.

I think I will likely find my best guy friends that will stick around after high school, when things aren't so sterotyped and black & white. I suppose friendships with ANYONE just happen naturally and I probably just am worrying because I'm trying to live up to a stereotype...

Any other tips though to help bust my way into the group of bros that I'm looking for are always appreciated!!