Am I depressed?

[NLasting]

Hello folks, I have just recently started HS and I have been thinking to myself for maybe 4 years and kept wondering..

Am I depressed?

Once I started MS I started noticing that there was an obvious decline in how I was enjoying life, and It seemed to only get worse, I have just started HS and I noticed I am smiling much more and I am a lot nicer to those around me, but the skies still seem Gray til this day.

I came to the conclusion it was the fact I noticed I grew up, and those around me were having sex, drinking, and doing drugs. I don't adjust well to change. I just feel like I'm living the same old gray life

I don't feel like I want to kill myself, It's not the way to handle this situation. Once and awhile I start to vividly remember times about my childhood, such as getting my first DS, running around outside, and playing with friends and such.

I have a lot of friends and I feel guilty because I shouldn't be depressed, or as I think.

My favorite type of days are a quiet, rainy, and gray day, I have no clue why. I just want to feel like life is perfect again, I want to see the sun shining through windows again, I want to feel great.

[Mynick]

I also love rainy gray day, dont worry about that. Some people dont adapt well when the environment changes. I know for a fact that i dont, its good that you dont think about suicide.
We are not doctors so we can't really diagnose you with depression, my advice is seek professional help.

[byee]

Hey Noah,

We can't diagnose you online, of course, but we can try to help.

Depression is defined by a bunch of symptoms like an inability to feel joy, listlessness, tearfulness, social withdrawal, changes in eating and sleeping patterns, and a whole lot of other things..that last at least 6 months. Everyone feels depressed, but that's different and usually in response to some loss or disappointment, but it passes. Depression is pretty debilitating and chronic. People usually know when they're depressed, and so do those around them.

Things change in adolescence, and not just the parts you can see. Feelings get more intense, and our ability to recognize them gets sharper. Maybe that's why things changed for you in MS, when puberty started. In any event, if you find that these feelings get in your way, it would be good to talk more about them (here, and there!), b/c no matter what the diagnosis or age, you should be generally pretty happy most of the time.

[Luminous]

Noah- it does sound like you are depressed. Many teens go through short phases of it triggered by hormones, but 4 years seems to be more than a phase. I am depressed too, but you know what I do? Smile. That's it. I force myself to smile and be grateful. And it works. It's hard to put on a smile. But just try it, right now. Smile. Smile tonight before you go to sleep, and when you wake up tomorrow. When you are eating breakfast. Doing homework. Tell yourself, "Just be happy. Just do it." It works for me, maybe it'll work for you.
As well as that, talk to people, talk to anyone and everyone. If you can get a therapist that is the ideal of course, but it sounds like you have a lot of really good friends you can talk to. There are also many people here who are willing to talk, myself included, so feel free to HMU.