Being Attracted.

[megandiane]

New to this forum, but I wanted to put a post out because i'm confused, as are a lot of people, about who i'm attracted to. I know this may sound weird but I've heard about having crushes and being in love from friends but I've never experienced anything like they have. I just want to know if this is normal, i'm eighteen and I want to have normal experiences like other people. I do feel sexually attracted to people but it's very logical and I haven't gone through that 'feeling' of love that people talk about all the time. If anyone has any advice or help for me, i'd like to know if this is normal and if there's anything I could figuratively do to work out if I like people... yeah that sounds weird to me as well! oh well, i'll post anyway!

[Living For Love]

Love is really a hard thing to understand. You'll eventually have your crushes and romances in the future, so don't worry. I've never had a girlfriend and I'm just find with that. Let me just tell you this: don't think that "love" and "sex" are the same thing. Our society has the annoying habit to reduce love and sexuality to it's reproductive functions, if you know what I mean, and just doesn't give any importance to the feelings and emotions we experiment throughout our lives. Our sexuality is expressed in the relations we have with the people around us. In this exact moment, there are people around you that love you. You don't have to have a boyfriend to feel love. Sorry if this sounds too stupid.

[sqishy]

Love is really a hard thing to understand. You'll eventually have your crushes and romances in the future, so don't worry. I've never had a girlfriend and I'm just find with that. Let me just tell you this: don't think that "love" and "sex" are the same thing. Our society has the annoying habit to reduce love and sexuality to it's reproductive functions, if you know what I mean, and just doesn't give any importance to the feelings and emotions we experiment throughout our lives. Our sexuality is expressed in the relations we have with the people around us. In this exact moment, there are people around you that love you. You don't have to have a boyfriend to feel love. Sorry if this sounds too stupid.

YES! YES! :D:D
This is what I think and have said in my "Is love really so black and white" post in the Ramblings of the Wise subsection. Not intending to advertise, but saying that I am really glad someone else has thought of what I thought :).

[Suave]

I'm 15 and feel the same way. I have a idea of love. I think if I loved someone I'll help them anyway possible and do anything to for them. I read a quote today "YOU DESERVE SOMEONE WHO WOULD JUMP FENCES TO BE WITH YOU. NOT SOMEONE WHO IS ON THE FENCE ABOUT BEING WITH YOU."

[justin 13]

Once I had a crush with a guy and went really bad. I was in love with this guy, but he just wanted be my friend.

[Special K]

Once I had a crush with a guy and went really bad. I was in love with this guy, but he just wanted be my friend.

That sucks but it happens to everyone. Believe me when I say that. But people do change their minds.

[emily-candace]

Well I may be in the same boat, I have had boyfriends but I haven't been in love with any of them yet. Not really getting the picture here either.

[Harley Quinn]

New to this forum, but I wanted to put a post out because i'm confused, as are a lot of people, about who i'm attracted to. I know this may sound weird but I've heard about having crushes and being in love from friends but I've never experienced anything like they have. I just want to know if this is normal, i'm eighteen and I want to have normal experiences like other people. I do feel sexually attracted to people but it's very logical and I haven't gone through that 'feeling' of love that people talk about all the time. If anyone has any advice or help for me, i'd like to know if this is normal and if there's anything I could figuratively do to work out if I like people... yeah that sounds weird to me as well! oh well, i'll post anyway!

It's normal to not have experienced love, to be honest, it's not the easiest thing in the world to experience. Everyone gets to that stage at different times in life and to be honest, if you haven't felt in love or whatever, doesn't mean it won't happen. We can't really help you with knowing if you're attracted to someone, you'll know, you'll feel it and you'll either love it or hate it. Liking someone is both joyful and incredibly hurtful. There's so many mixed emotions and feelings, it's all a bit weird. You have your whole life to fall in love and all that stuff and you shouldn't rush it. You're totally normal with these feelings.

[megandiane]

thanks all for advice!

[byee]

Love is a normal emotion, we all experience it. What gets confusing for people is how it's actually established, though.

A "Crush" is basically a fantasy, it comes from perceptions based on need...we create a feeling based on visuals, how we perceive someone without much actual info or experience with them. That's not love.

True love takes time to evolve, it needs time and space and experience with the person to take root and grow, it's a slow process, not something you feel instantly or even after just a bit of time.

[ska8er]

love hurts