Help me escape from the friend zone!

[variantwarrior]

Ok, so there's this girl I really like:wub:. We'd been really good friends for a couple of years. About a year ago, I told her how I felt about her. She responded with a little shock, but more just laughing. Apparently, she'd had a crush on me for a while. At first I was ecstatic, but then she said she'd given up on that a long time ago. She wasn't interested anymore. I tried to get her attention for a couple of days. Then, she goes and accepts a date with another guy, who happens to be one of my friends:mad:! He's gone now, and I want to try again. First of all, is this wise? Second, how do I bring it up? What am I supposed to do?

[Cygnus]

Relax, first of all if she just stopped dating this other guy then do not rush to asking her out, give her her time and then just directly do it, if she says no its a no, no need to keep insisting.

[JamesSuperBoy]

Enjoy being friends - give her time and be prepared to accept whatever.

[Poisonberry]

TBH, if you've been friend-zoned you're probably done. Sorry. IMO you'd need to not see her for a year or two and then be almost like a different person to get another chance and even then unless you're really different you'll go right back to being a friend. IMO you should cut your loses and move on, there are way too many ppl out there to spend your time wishing for one that doesn't want you.

[variantwarrior]

She's one of those friends who you notice everywhere, even if you aren't looking. Seriously! At school, I sit all the way across the cafeteria and somehow still can make eye contact. She just smiles, sometimes she waves. I wish it were easier to disappear. Anyway, thanks for advice. I'll try to give her some space and hope it works.:D

[Meganium]

TBH, if you've been friend-zoned you're probably done. Sorry. IMO you'd need to not see her for a year or two and then be almost like a different person to get another chance and even then unless you're really different you'll go right back to being a friend. IMO you should cut your loses and move on, there are way too many ppl out there to spend your time wishing for one that doesn't want you.

That isn't very optimistic. It's not like the guy doesn't know the girl that well, or that she was never remotely interested. She was interested, but because it wasn't told to her, she backed off, which made sense. Seeing as though they're still good friends, and that his feelings have now been explained, I believe there is at least some chance.

Point is, OP, continue to hang with her and maybe whatever charm you had that got her in the first place can get her again over time. Your feelings will go away eventually if nothing happens.

[LouBerry]

Just ask her out. Get her alone, and in person, and tell her how you feel, and she will too.

[Poisonberry]

That isn't very optimistic. It's not like the guy doesn't know the girl that well, or that she was never remotely interested. She was interested, but because it wasn't told to her, she backed off, which made sense. Seeing as though they're still good friends, and that his feelings have now been explained, I believe there is at least some chance.

Point is, OP, continue to hang with her and maybe whatever charm you had that got her in the first place can get her again over time. Your feelings will go away eventually if nothing happens.

I didn't know the truth was required to be optimistic. LOL.

I don't really know the culture here, is blowing smoke up each others asses the way everyone likes it? I was telling the truth, and sometimes unfortunately the truth sucks. In my circle of friends once a guy has been friend-zoned there's almost no way back - ever.

[Meganium]

I didn't know the truth was required to be optimistic. LOL.

I don't really know the culture here, is blowing smoke up each others asses the way everyone likes it? I was telling the truth, and sometimes unfortunately the truth sucks. In my circle of friends once a guy has been friend-zoned there's almost no way back - ever.

I'm not saying don't tell the truth, and I'm sure as hell not suggesting for anyone to sugarcoat what really needs to be said. I'm just saying he has more of a chance than what your saying in my opinion.

This "friendzone" that I have my strong doubts about, does not seem to hold much water in this situation. This girl was interested in him before, so there is a chance that the OP can make that happen again. A chance. So long as there is that much, then the friendzone is basically shattered.

[Poisonberry]

I'm not saying don't tell the truth, and I'm sure as hell not suggesting for anyone to sugarcoat what really needs to be said. I'm just saying he has more of a chance than what your saying in my opinion.

This "friendzone" that I have my strong doubts about, does not seem to hold much water in this situation. This girl was interested in him before, so there is a chance that the OP can make that happen again. A chance. So long as there is that much, then the friendzone is basically shattered.

So interested that she accepted a date with another guy right after he told her how he felt. I don't think the friend-zone is as easy to escape as you think, but then again neither one of us know him or her. I'm speaking from my experience and that of my friends. Having a crush once and then being 'friends' for a couple years = stuck in the friend zone for life. Based on that and the number of fish in the sea I don't think the OP should waste time on something that probably isn't going to happen. But whatever, I have nothing to lose here.

[Meganium]

So interested that she accepted a date with another guy right after he told her how he felt. I don't think the friend-zone is as easy to escape as you think, but then again neither one of us know him or her. I'm speaking from my experience and that of my friends. Having a crush once and then being 'friends' for a couple years = stuck in the friend zone for life. Based on that and the number of fish in the sea I don't think the OP should waste time on something that probably isn't going to happen. But whatever, I have nothing to lose here.

This was a different situation though, as the most usual time for the "friendzoning" to take place, was not used to tell the girl. So really, nobody was ever friendzoned, because nothing was said until now after many years.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, OP isn't doomed yet, friendzone or no friendzone. Not far from doomed, but still not doomed.

[Slippers]

This is SOOOOOO difficult and has happened to me in the past. In my situation it actually ruined our friendship because she felt I was pushing her into something more than she wanted. From my perspective I didn't feel I could sustain a friendship with her as she secured dates with other guys - it was too hurtful for me.

Every situation is different of course and you have two options. 1) either reaffirm your feelings and hope she reciprocates, or 2) keep quiet and continue as friends.

Obviously each instance will lead to a different outcome and you just need to work out the consequence of each one. If you're content as friends don't spoil the status quo. If you're unhappy about the status quo then try and secure a more intimate relationship with her.

[DPoficial]

if u love her then show her pull he close ook in her eyes tell her your pain hope dream with the relationship

[Poisonberry]

if u love her then show her pull he close ook in her eyes tell her your pain hope dream with the relationship

Then once you're sure you're in the friend-zone, and if you do the above you will be, lock the door and swallow the key.