Brain-Block

[SawyerSauce]

I don't let myself feel because it's a vulnerability. I feel very deeply. I think very rationally. The two coexist constantly in my head, yet they are like two pieces from different puzzles. They don't work well together, at least not when I am depressed and upset.

I prefer the rational side of myself. I like thinking. It's like a sport to me. I love it, but it's also the cause of most if not all of my problems. If I could choose to be born without a 140+ IQ then I would in a heartbeat.

I mostly just ignore all my emotions. I don't have time to deal with them. Over time, I get a mental brain block. I attribute this to higher levels of stress. Stress is constant in my life but goes through cycles where it increases.

I'm exhausted. I don't want to deal with feeling. I've got crap I need to do. I don't have time to deal with this stuff. I don't have the resources to either.

But I feel very congested, stressed, and mentally stagnant because of this.

What do I do?

[Mynick]

I think you should not focus in your problems. Its like an endless loop. If you focus on them then you i'll be more sad then the story would go over and over again.
Try to find some hobbies, try to help others, focus on other problems than your self and see if that does the trick. Keep your mind busy but not focusing on yourself.
Don't get me wrong, i'm not saying you should ignore your problems, just try not thinking all the time.
And +140 IQ its kids IQ test or adult? Because its changes..

[1_21Guns]

Give your mind something to chew on, unfortunately our brains are dangerously powerful things, and in my opinion the most powerful weapon there is. People who are very rational often find it hard to contemplate emotions because well, they aren't rational things. try not to fret too much about your emotions and just let them come and go, learning to deal with your emotions is something that's really important for you to do, don't try and run from them look them in the face and try and get to the bottom of why you feel like that and then you can address it appropriately, running only tires you further

[SawyerSauce]

And +140 IQ its kids IQ test or adult? Because its changes..

Adult IQ test.

Give your mind something to chew on, unfortunately our brains are dangerously powerful things, and in my opinion the most powerful weapon there is. People who are very rational often find it hard to contemplate emotions because well, they aren't rational things. try not to fret too much about your emotions and just let them come and go, learning to deal with your emotions is something that's really important for you to do, don't try and run from them look them in the face and try and get to the bottom of why you feel like that and then you can address it appropriately, running only tires you further

Okay, that's good advice. I'm a bit OCD and need to control everything. Not being able to control my emotions internally really bothers me. I don't know if just letting them "come and go" would work for me. How do you suggest I do that?

[1_21Guns]

Adult IQ test.



Okay, that's good advice. I'm a bit OCD and need to control everything. Not being able to control my emotions internally really bothers me. I don't know if just letting them "come and go" would work for me. How do you suggest I do that?

I assume your frustrated by the fact you may feel a certain way because of something and you either can't change the thing that made you feel that way or because you can't change how you've reacted to it. I'd suggest for example if you felt sad you just sit down and think okay why do I feel like this and if you can make changes to the situation to feel better then do, if you can't just try and accept it, rise above it, think okay I'm sad but that's okay I'm not going to let it frustrate me. Acceptance is a lot easier said than done, but accepting my moods and emotions instead of trying to fight them helped me one hell of a lot

[sqishy]

Sounds like you are having a worse but similar situation to what I've had last in my summer holidays of 2012, and started to sort out in summer holidays of this year (and I happen to have and IQ in the 140s too).
I have always had my emotions/feeling/experiences opposed by my logic/reasoning/thinking. When I was 12 up to this June, I tried to look at life in with logical rules, like you could live life in a strictly organised way. It worked a bit (especially with studying), but it became a huge problem in 2012. During my summer holidays of then I forcibly tried to use my creative and spontaneous skills to look at the world in a different way. The problem was my logical mind was on watch and trying to put strict rules in here and there, resulting in disaster.
For example, I tried to create a calendar using precise calculations of lunar and solar motion, and it would only be properly my calendar if I were to create the formulas. So I wasted my summer doing stuff like that, not simply enjoying my time (incidentally I did get the calendar completed in May this year (by relaxing my OCD logic), but I tore it up a few weeks ago, because I felt it was not going to help me live any better).
The situation of my logical mind resisting suspension when necessary was made worse, when my feelings and emotions for the same gender came into play (read the replies I made for posts on that topic for more info). From 2009 I loved someone in my school year more than I have ever had feelings for any other. I loved his appearance and personality so much. It my feelings were unrequited (he knew nothing of this at all), and so these feelings were pent-up. So I entered this personal crisis on myself and the world: I only ever really viewed myself and the world in logical and organised ways, and when all the illogical aspects of life, the world and my unexplained feelings and emotional effusiveness came into view, I saw that my whole outlook on life so far was wrong. I had to look at life and myself differently. The only way I could do this was to sort of betray my past self's values: suspend logic and immerse myself in my feelings and emotions, to release the pressure, and see what I would find and what would change. That day was the 26th of June.
Though I didn't have courage to come out to my parents directly, I nevertheless did it, and it changed me. I use my logic and reasoning where it works in viewing the world and life, the same goes for emotions and feeling. I've never cried so much in the past 2 months, simply because I let go of all my internal limits and boundaries. I could go on about my life in this, but it won't be relevant anymore. As I've said, you can find it in other posts of mine.

My advice is to not hide your emotions: BE IN THEM when you have private time and see your feelings trying to surface again. Experience/feeling and logic/reasoning are equally important for living. For now it's best to put emphasis on the experience and feelings, to recognize why you have them.
When you have imbalances between emotion and logic in your life, it is because your subconscious (which has been doing an amazing job of keeping your mental health in order for so long) is being overworked. This is because you are consciously avoiding your feelings and therefore unconsciously forcing the subconscious to sort it out.
Only by direct conscious effort can you see what's going on in your internal world now. Every imbalance has a reason of being there: accept it's there and be in it. You can only find out what your emotions are truly like if you dive right into it. No amount of logical theorizing can do that. Your feelings want to be noticed: give them a chance to live, because they are a part of you. Stopping a part of you from living is stopping yourself from living fully.
It works with sexual energy: most guys (including me) jerk off because of the build-up of sexual energy that has no other way of escaping other than to plunge into and experience it.

The character Terrence said in the film Yes Man the word YES (obviously XD). He also said "If you say no to your life, you're not living". I say to you now that if you say no to your emotions and feelings, you won't be fully living. Yes, a balance must be kept with logic and feelings (your logic is fine without you needing to thin about it), but you must have Yin and Yang. Only with that, can you say that YES, I am living.

I hope I'm helpful with this, and not too long-winded. I am still very well within this course of action, but it has made me change more as a person in the last 2 months alone, than the 2 years previous to that. Hoping that your situation improves!