I broke the promise..

[Drew dReaMS]

My girlfriend and I swore not to cut anymore months ago. We cut one last time and buried them together. Recently my depression has been at an all time high. We got in an argument and long story short, I cut myself. Now she said she can't trust me anymore. That pact was the only reason we were still alive and I absolutely ruined it... How can I get her to trust me again? I feel guilty just looking at her.

[Castle of Glass]

how long did you go for not cutting? 1 2 3 months? if you did it once, you can do it again. Relapse does happen, they always happen with an addiction. did you distract yourself from the urges? like doing the butterfly project or some other thing like that? if she is your true girlfriend, she should understand that your depression was at an all time high and that it was the only logical thing for you to do.

But now, get rid of the blades, chuck them in a lake drain, anywhere were you can't physically get them and start again. Guilt comes when ever you break a promise, but she should understand that your depression was getting the better of you.

[1_21Guns]

Relapse is a perfectly normal thing during recovery, it happens and she must know that. She's probably afraid if you don't have the strength she won't be able to cope either, so she's just afraid. You both want to beat this, so you both can, throw whatever you used away, get rid of it. Don't let losing one battle lose you the war, because you most certainly can win it.

[suicidalbutter]

Relapsing is perfectly normal, and you should discuss this with her. Just explain that you relapsed and why. Don't sugar coat it, just tell her how you are feeling inside. Also don't tell her it won't happen again, because no one can really tell the future when it comes to self harm or any addiction (Though we all hope we will never do it again). But do tell her you are willing to redo the pact of "no cutting", and start on road of recovery again. Remind her that if she ever relapses you will be right there for her, just as she should be there for you. You two can still continue to fight the addiction together, and be successful.