What should I do about this guy? Plus, do you think his atitude is normal?

[Dawn01]

So, it's the same guy I told you about in this (http://www.virtualteen.org/forums/showthread.php?t=188558) thread, but the situation has changed: he phoned my home and asked to talk to my mother (although I was the one who aswered his call at first, I was like "WTF?"). He told her that he likes me, but we are both stressed and we keep fighting, and that I should give him some time, I should not text or call him for a while.

OK... HE SAID TO MY MOTHER THAT I SHOULD GIVE HIM TIME, BUT WHEN I OFFERED HIM TIME, HE SAID THAT IT WOULD NOT BE WORTH AND THAT NOTHING COULD SAVE OUR RELATIONSHIP! So I sent lots of texts calling him rude and telling him that he was crazy, and he called me insane. WHAT THE FUCK THIS GUY HAS IN MIND??! He said on the last time we saw each other in person that he never wanted to lose my friendship, but them he said that we couldn't even be friends anymore! It does not make sense!! :what: Why I am the insane one??

So, I'm preparing myself to college, and since he studies in the same University and in the same building I am going to study, I'm also preparing myself to meet him there and ask about what happened and why he said those things. Do you think I'll do the right thing?

Also, do you think it's normal to say horrible things to friends when you are stressed? I mean, is it normal to get so stressed you just end your relationships?! I don't know, I think would never do such thing, but that's just me. He says he did that because he was stressed, could he be telling the truth? How could a person say he/she never want to lose you and then say that he/she doesn't want you in his/her life anymore in a couple of weeks? And he said it has nothing to do with another girl, he said it's just him... I don't know, this is VERY confusing :(

Update: Just spotted him in the campus today, in the line waiting to take a plate and have lunch! He was talking to a woman that seemed to be older than him, and he was far from the guys of his class (I know some people from his class and I found that somewhat weird...). I asked him what happened and he was calm, he said he was upset with me and said "but hey, you started the fight!", and he said "Yeah...We'll talk about it another hour, now it's not appropriate, just give me some time." I asked him again if he was with another and he sweared he wasn't. I hugged him and he hugged me back, I said I didn't want to argue with him and he sighed and smiled... And then I ran and cried in my friend's shoulder (I've always been too emotional, so it's not a big deal)

What do you think? I'll let him take his time and try to distract myself with other boys just to make my mind relax a bit. I still like him a lot though :/

[ByXaz]

Just let him have time. Definitely don't get angry at him that'll probably just make him more confused.

[Dawn01]

Just let him have time. Definitely don't get angry at him that'll probably just make him more confused.

That's what I'll do! But I want to ask him about what he truly wants from me first, if he wants me to move on, if he wants me to stay, if he is confused about me, etc. He said he wanted me to be accepted in this University so we could be together in our freetime there, I don't really get why he says different things, that's confusing!

[Camazotz]

That's what I'll do! But I want to ask him about what he truly wants from me first, if he wants me to move on, if he wants me to stay, if he is confused about me, etc. He said he wanted me to be accepted in this University so we could be together in our freetime there, I don't really get why he says different things, that's confusing!

Do this; be the mature one, find out what he wants when the situation is calm, and do whatever you feel is best (leave him alone, try to be friends again, whatver).

[JamesSuperBoy]

you kinda bombed the guy with texts

as others have said you be the mature one.

[Dawn01]

Do this; be the mature one, find out what he wants when the situation is calm, and do whatever you feel is best (leave him alone, try to be friends again, whatver).

Yeah! Thank you, now I feel more secure about doing it :)

you kinda bombed the guy with texts

as others have said you be the mature one.

I know, but he got me nervous and I just exploded in rage :/ I was being nice to him, trying to calm him down, but he was so rude that I can say that he was impolite! AND FOR NO REASON, EVERYTHING WAS FINE, I SWEAR!! Maybe it was something not related to me that made him angry and I talked to him in a bad hour, I don't really know, I just wonder...

[Cygnus]

Leave him alone for a bit, maybe a month, and then talk to him. When I told my ex that we were breaking up she wouldn't stop texting me and that was only an incentive to never talk to her again.

[plebble]

So, it's the same guy I told you about in this (http://www.virtualteen.org/forums/showthread.php?t=188558) thread, but the situation has changed: he phoned my home and asked to talk to my mother (although I was the one who aswered his call at first, I was like "WTF?"). He told her that he likes me, but we are both stressed and we keep fighting, and that I should give him some time, I should not text or call him for a while.

OK... HE SAID TO MY MOTHER THAT I SHOULD GIVE HIM TIME, BUT WHEN I OFFERED HIM TIME, HE SAID THAT IT WOULD NOT BE WORTH AND THAT NOTHING COULD SAVE OUR RELATIONSHIP! So I sent lots of texts calling him rude and telling him that he was crazy, and he called me insane. WHAT THE FUCK THIS GUY HAS IN MIND??! He said on the last time we saw each other in person that he never wanted to lose my friendship, but them he said that we couldn't even be friends anymore! It does not make sense!! :what: Why I am the insane one??

So, I'm preparing myself to college, and since he studies in the same University and in the same building I am going to study, I'm also preparing myself to meet him there and ask about what happened and why he said those things. Do you think I'll do the right thing?

Also, do you think it's normal to say horrible things to friends when you are stressed? I mean, is it normal to get so stressed you just end your relationships?! I don't know, I think would never do such thing, but that's just me. He says he did that because he was stressed, could he be telling the truth? How could a person say he/she never want to lose you and then say that he/she doesn't want you in his/her life anymore in a couple of weeks? And he said it has nothing to do with another girl, he said it's just him... I don't know, this is VERY confusing :(

I know this hurts, but I think you should move on from him. He's clearly crazy and your relationship definitely won't work now after the arguments and the insults. You could try being friends, but I think it would be a bit awkward. Friendships are always awkward after you break up with them.

This happened to me 6 days ago, I was excited to see my girlfriend and she left me. We were perfect and we liked everything about each other, we never argued and she made so many promises to me. In 1 day she broke all of that, including my heart. She left me destroyed while she got a new boyfriend the next day who she only met 2 days ago. So yes, I think there is a chance he's found another girl. I only say that from my experience, but I find that very likely.

[Dawn01]

Leave him alone for a bit, maybe a month, and then talk to him. When I told my ex that we were breaking up she wouldn't stop texting me and that was only an incentive to never talk to her again.


I already stopped texting him, I only texted that much in one day because I was mad and I wanted him to burn in hell! But now I'm confused about what he truly wants from me, if he haven't called my mother and said that he liked me although he was stressed and having a bad time with me, I would still want him to burn in hell!

Couldn't find him in the campus today, but I'll try to take a better look tomorrow. Seems that he is working in a laboratory this semester (he studies biology)

I know this hurts, but I think you should move on from him. He's clearly crazy and your relationship definitely won't work now after the arguments and the insults. You could try being friends, but I think it would be a bit awkward. Friendships are always awkward after you break up with them.

This happened to me 6 days ago, I was excited to see my girlfriend and she left me. We were perfect and we liked everything about each other, we never argued and she made so many promises to me. In 1 day she broke all of that, including my heart. She left me destroyed while she got a new boyfriend the next day who she only met 2 days ago. So yes, I think there is a chance he's found another girl. I only say that from my experience, but I find that very likely.

Just one point: We were NOT dating. We were good friends and we were planning to try being something more than friends.

I really would understand if we said that he was with another girl, we kinda made a "pact" saying that we would still be friends if things got wrong. Ok, I'd be sad and maybe I'd ask him to give me time, but he would be telling me the truth, what could I do? It's one of his rights!

But yeah, maybe he is crazy :/

[Dawn01]

Update: Just spotted him in the campus today, in the line waiting to take a plate and have lunch! He was talking to a woman that seemed to be older than him, and he was far from the guys of his class (I know some people from his class and I found that somewhat weird...). I asked him what happened and he was calm, he said he was upset with me and said "but hey, you started the fight!", and he said "Yeah...We'll talk about it another hour, now it's not appropriate, just give me some time." I asked him again if he was with another and he sweared he wasn't. I hugged him and he hugged me back, I said I didn't want to argue with him and he sighed and smiled... And then I ran and cried in my friend's shoulder (I've always been too emotional, so it's not a big deal)

What do you think? I'll let him take his time and try to distract myself with other boys just to make my mind relax a bit. I still like him a lot though :/

[Living For Love]

Ok, so I've went through both of the threads and all the posts and here's what I think: he's struggling between two things: your friendship and the friendship he has for other guys. You know, for us, boys, friendship is really a very important thing. If girls have their discussions, two days later everything might be ok again, but that doesn't happen with us guys. We more "formal" to eachothers.

Anyway, my suggestion is that you try everything again from zero. I think he's way too confused, and that's understandable, but you also need to give him space. If you notice he's coming your way while you're walking, smile to him and say hi. I'm almost sure he still feels something for you, and that will eventualy bloom and he'll come talk to you. You just need to be patient and wait. And if you're still in love with him, avoid being around other guys for too long, or he'll notice that.

Every relationship has its ups and downs, but nothing is lost. If he doesn't want to be your boyfriend, at least make sure he wants to be your friend, and make him know that he can count on you for anything. You hugged him and he smilled, that must mean something.

[Dawn01]

Ok, so I've went through both of the threads and all the posts and here's what I think: he's struggling between two things: your friendship and the friendship he has for other guys. You know, for us, boys, friendship is really a very important thing. If girls have their discussions, two days later everything might be ok again, but that doesn't happen with us guys. We more "formal" to eachothers.

Anyway, my suggestion is that you try everything again from zero. I think he's way too confused, and that's understandable, but you also need to give him space. If you notice he's coming your way while you're walking, smile to him and say hi. I'm almost sure he still feels something for you, and that will eventualy bloom and he'll come talk to you. You just need to be patient and wait. And if you're still in love with him, avoid being around other guys for too long, or he'll notice that.

Every relationship has its ups and downs, but nothing is lost. If he doesn't want to be your boyfriend, at least make sure he wants to be your friend, and make him know that he can count on you for anything. You hugged him and he smilled, that must mean something.

That was the best aswear someone could give me about this situation! I think you are super right :D


Things are not making much sense because he is confused and I recognize that I was putting pressure in him before, although I didn't mean to do any harm to him! And yeah, seems that he likes me at least as a friend... I saw him almost everyday last week and on Wednesday I even met him in the bus, and sat near to him! We talked mostly about college, but when I asked if his brother was doing fine *his brother has severe depression problems*, he said "maybe"... I think that he has been really stressed lately and that was why he was rude to me.

Thank you very much! Now I can't wait to meet him in the campus so I can use your advice ^^ I will tell him what I feel and my point of view about the whole situation, and say that I forgive him and that he can always count on me even if he only wants my friendship :yes: