I don't identify as a part of the LGBT+ community?

[Magenta]

So I just posted this on my Tumblr but I thought I'd bring it here for another opinion.

Is it weird that I don’t really identify as part of the ‘LGBT+ community’? Yes, I’m openly bisexual and a lot of people may say that automatically makes me a part of that community. But to me it doesn’t. I have never attended Pride events, I have never been part of an LGBT+ club at school. I’ve never made any sort of contribution to this certain community everyone talks about. If anything, I’ve never even stepped foot in that community in any way. And not because I have anything against it, I just simply… haven’t.

Perhaps I’ve just never felt I needed to because I’ve never felt like I needed a community to be able to call my own and feel comfortable in. And before someone gets on my case about it being privileged to feel that way, I know. But I’ve never felt I needed a community other than the one I’ve always lived in, filled with all sorts of people, some friendlier than others. In a way it almost feels isolating because when people say “oh, so you’re LGBT+" or whatnot, well… yes, I’m bisexual but… I’ve never set foot in this ‘LGBT+ community’. I never even know what people are talking about. And, at the same time, I don’t really mind ‘cause it’s not like it’s some exclusive club I need to join to really be bisexual.

It’s just strange to think about.

I mean, I just don't have any connection to the community besides happening to enjoy having sex and relationships with the same sex 50% of the time. That's it. I don't exactly have 'bisexual pride' or what not. I have nothing to be proud of. I don't mean it in a demeaning way, just that... I don't feel like I should have to be proud of it. It is what it is and I'm happy so... that's it. It's as simple as that to me. I don't need or want to celebrate it. But I feel like the only one.

[Extreme586]

I'm in sort of the same boat as you. I'm gay yet have never done any of that stuff either.
When people say the LGBT community, they are just talking about a group of people.
You being bi and I myself being gay makes us apart of this group of people.
It's basically a term for any group of people that aren't straight, assuming those people are lesbian, gay, bi, or transgender.

[Trace]

You don't really have to attend pride to be part of the "community." But, if you don't mind me asking, why?

[teen.jpg]

You don't have to "do" anything to be part of the community. But you're still in the community by being bisexual. It's inclusive not exclusive.

[Abyssal Echo]

I'm in sort of the same boat as you. I'm gay yet have never done any of that stuff either.
When people say the LGBT community, they are just talking about a group of people.
You being bi and I myself being gay makes us apart of this group of people.
It's basically a term for any group of people that aren't straight, assuming those people are lesbian, gay, bi, or transgender.

I'm the same way :/ I'm gay and have never done anything to be an active part of the community. I guess since I'm gay I'm part of it though.

[uglyinsideandout]

Why would you feel like you had to part of the community at all? There's no straight pride parades and I never heard anyone straight that was worried about it. I think you just be who you are, you seem awesome to me. And if that includes going to pride events then great, if not, then great. :)

[Magenta]

Why would you feel like you had to part of the community at all? There's no straight pride parades and I never heard anyone straight that was worried about it. I think you just be who you are, you seem awesome to me. And if that includes going to pride events then great, if not, then great. :)

Well, that's the thing. I almost don't really like the idea of being in some community meant just for LGBT+. It makes me feel weird. Like, um, okay. Maybe because I'm bisexual, I identify more closely with straight people because it's a 50/50 split for me rather than someone who is gay or someone who it more like 80/20, liking same sex better.

To me, the idea of having a special community for LGBT+ persons just feels like I'm actively isolating myself even further. Like, I get on just fine without feeling like a part of this community I'm supposedly in.

But everyone is just like "oh you should be proud for being out of the closet" or likes to say I'm part of some community I have never identified with. I was never in the closet either. This community just seems to band together so closely and I feel strange for not wanting to be a part of it.

It's just weird because I feel like the only one who doesn't want to be part of this community that almost seems to be forced on me these days. I keep wanting to tell people "no, I'm not totally straight, no I'm not LGBT+, I'm a human being". It's enough for me to say I'm bisexual because I'm the one saying it, it just feels weird that everyone else tries to place me in some community I don't feel any relationship with because of it.

Also, to someone who asked me why I don't attend Pride, I don't like Pride celebrations. I don't believe they're as great as everyone thinks they are. They practically expect everyone who identifies with any LGBT+ label to act a certain way, to flaunt their sexuality, etc. I'm sorry but from what I've seen, it is kinda true. And all my straight friends have some misconceptions about what LGBT+ people are really like because Pride makes us look like we all run around half-naked, covered in rainbows and shouting how proud we are. It makes us look like we're... something else. Not people who simply love other people, but a giant cause. And there is a giant cause and fight for equality but I feel like I get told I have to be a part of this cause simply because of who I am. No, I'm not a cause, I'm a person. Those celebrations actually make me feel more segregated than simply living my life because it's just like... if straight people don't do it, seriously why do we? We're human beings, not aliens because of our sexuality and it's almost by annually advertising it, people are proving how different they are and that they're proud. I don't want to be seen as different though. So I don't attend Pride. I see no reason to and have no desire to.

[teen.jpg]

Well, that's the thing. I almost don't really like the idea of being in some community meant just for LGBT+. It makes me feel weird. Like, um, okay. Maybe because I'm bisexual, I identify more closely with straight people because it's a 50/50 split for me rather than someone who is gay or someone who it more like 80/20, liking same sex better.

To me, the idea of having a special community for LGBT+ persons just feels like I'm actively isolating myself even further. Like, I get on just fine without feeling like a part of this community I'm supposedly in.

But everyone is just like "oh you should be proud for being out of the closet" or likes to say I'm part of some community I have never identified with. I was never in the closet either. This community just seems to band together so closely and I feel strange for not wanting to be a part of it.

It's just weird because I feel like the only one who doesn't want to be part of this community that almost seems to be forced on me these days. I keep wanting to tell people "no, I'm not totally straight, no I'm not LGBT+, I'm a human being". It's enough for me to say I'm bisexual because I'm the one saying it, it just feels weird that everyone else tries to place me in some community I don't feel any relationship with because of it.

Also, to someone who asked me why I don't attend Pride, I don't like Pride celebrations. I don't believe they're as great as everyone thinks they are. They practically expect everyone who identifies with any LGBT+ label to act a certain way, to flaunt their sexuality, etc. I'm sorry but from what I've seen, it is kinda true. And all my straight friends have some misconceptions about what LGBT+ people are really like because Pride makes us look like we all run around half-naked, covered in rainbows and shouting how proud we are. It makes us look like we're... something else. Not people who simply love other people, but a giant cause. And there is a giant cause and fight for equality but I feel like I get told I have to be a part of this cause simply because of who I am. No, I'm not a cause, I'm a person. Those celebrations actually make me feel more segregated than simply living my life because it's just like... if straight people don't do it, seriously why do we? We're human beings, not aliens because of our sexuality and it's almost by annually advertising it, people are proving how different they are and that they're proud. I don't want to be seen as different though. So I don't attend Pride. I see no reason to and have no desire to.

You may be thinking too far into this. That's not what the community is about at all :O

Besides, it's not supposed to exclude straight people, thats how it ties into the Gay-Straight Alliance.

But yeah, nobody's forcing you to say you're LGBT or anything. It doesn't matter that much.

[uglyinsideandout]

I don't even know where I am with my sexuality. I've never had anything but straight sex but it was hopefully not the normal kind. At this point I don't want anything with a penis to touch me. I'm probably not being entirely fair to boys but it's true and it's how I feel. I never thought about the idea of being with a girl. And even now that it's in my mind I don't know if it's something I would even want to try. I'll probably end up a dried up old asexual prune all by myself.

So that was kind of random, but I guess I'm trying to say that my opinion doesn't mean much because I don't have a dog in this fight. I just think you should do what feels right to you and if you don't feel attached to that community you shouldn't feel obligated. They will do whatever they do with or without you.

[teen.jpg]

I don't even know where I am with my sexuality. I've never had anything but straight sex but it was hopefully not the normal kind. At this point I don't want anything with a penis to touch me. I'm probably not being entirely fair to boys but it's true and it's how I feel. I never thought about the idea of being with a girl. And even now that it's in my mind I don't know if it's something I would even want to try. I'll probably end up a dried up old asexual prune all by myself.

So that was kind of random, but I guess I'm trying to say that my opinion doesn't mean much because I don't have a dog in this fight. I just think you should do what feels right to you and if you don't feel attached to that community you shouldn't feel obligated. They will do whatever they do with or without you.

I hope you know sex doesn't have much to do with your orientation. And you don't "end up asexual", it's just something you are or not.

It'd be like saying someone ends up gay because they had bad straight experiences.

[Magenta]

You may be thinking too far into this. That's not what the community is about at all :O

Besides, it's not supposed to exclude straight people, thats how it ties into the Gay-Straight Alliance.

But yeah, nobody's forcing you to say you're LGBT or anything. It doesn't matter that much.

It's funny because that's actually how people have been with me though. It's like I'm expected to be doing something or whatnot. That's seriously how I've been treated in terms of the LGBT+ people I know which is why I'm thinking about it in such a way.

And the people I know exclude straight people entirely which may be why I want no part. It's just weird and uncomfortable but that's all I've ever been exposed to.

[uglyinsideandout]

I hope you know sex doesn't have much to do with your orientation. And you don't "end up asexual", it's just something you are or not.

It'd be like saying someone ends up gay because they had bad straight experiences.

As I said I don't know what I am because I don't want to have sex with anyone. I've always kinda felt this way so it's not like it's a new thing. Maybe it will change, maybe it won't. I'm not going to put any limits on myself in that way.

I really disagree with your last statement because that's not what I was saying at all.

[britishboy]

I've never had anything but straight sex but it was hopefully not the normal kind. At this point I don't want anything with a penis to touch me. I'm probably not being entirely fair to boys but it's true and it's how I feel.

why bad experience?

[uglyinsideandout]

why bad experience?

I don't want to hijack the thread. Just say I have some mixed feelings about it but overall they aren't good.