My cousin is dead.

[Vintage Gamer Guy]

Ok, so I'm not sure how to put all this into words, but my cousin was the only one I could talk to about my self harming. It was the same for her. The other day I went over to her house to check up on her. She was home alone, her parents were out of town. I walked into her room and found her on her bed, with a slit wrist. A note was on her desk. I just couldn't comprehend what had happened. She hadn't given me any hints that she was gonna take her SH to another level. I had been 12 days clean of the blade, but after I saw her laying there, the urges were just so strong. I cut earlier today. Reality has not caught up to me yet.

[1_21Guns]

I'm sure she wouldn't want you to hurt yourself, 12 days is an amazing achievement, so why don't you make her proud? Show her you can fight this and that you'll win, because I know you can. I know witnessing that will have been traumatic for you, but she's in a better place now, she's not hurting any more, you can still talk to her, I'm sure she'll be listening :hug3:

[uglyinsideandout]

I am so so sorry to hear this. I don't have any words that can help but I wish I did to comfort you. Please don't follow your cousin. Talk to someone or even just us about it but don't hurt yourself. Please.

[Vintage Gamer Guy]

Thank you. I mean it. I am just trying to wrap my brain around this and get a grasp of reality. I have a funeral to get prepared for in the morning. I will most likely wear the suit she helped me pick out for my first dance. I think this may be the time I have been waiting for. A pathway to a minor goal. Or maybe I need to distract myself from all of this and go out into the world acting like everything is ok when that is the furthest thing from the truth.

[uglyinsideandout]

I can't see how acting like nothing is wrong will help.

[Allain1996]

I'm so sorry for your loss man!
What you need to remember is that you and her helped each other work on overcoming your self-harming, and I guarantee you that she wouldn't want you to slip back because of her! As others have said, 12 days is an amazing accomplishment in overcoming self-harming. I know that the stress of this is making you feel like you're falling back into the hole you were in, but please, if not for yourself than for your cousin, don't let this ruin your achievements in overcoming your cutting!

[plebble]

oh man I'm so sorry :(
I don't know what to say :(

[Versae]

Don't hurt yourself anymore. I'm sure your cousin has her reasons. Talk to her sometimes.