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View Full Version : Not Sure Why I Feel So Unfulfilled


Biscuithead13
July 16th, 2013, 12:32 AM
So I've had my heart broken many times and recently I've had "things" with quite a few guys. I've always felt like my heart is broken and I have had intimate encounters with a couple guys within the last few months. The first of which was a good and trusting friend who told me he was bi curious, so he wanted to experiment, which we did twice at sleepovers, the 2nd time of which went very well. A couple problems though: He has basically told me he would love to date me, but just "cant," and he has been on an extended camping trip for awhile, so I've had very limited contact with him for the last month. Bless his heart cuz he does so much for me and everyone and hes confused about his sexuality I think. I've expressed feelings for him before, and was told he'd love to be my boyfriend, but just "cant." This hit me quite hard but I cant tell anyone about it because what we did was secret. Hes a total sweetheart and is quite possibly the best person I've ever met.


My second situation is a guy I met at church camp about 3 weeks ago, he told me he was gay and I thought he was really cute and vice versa. We really hit it off and things turned physical quickly, we had a couple awesome nights in his dorm. Post camp, we talked everyday and he lives in GA, I live in TN so we live long distance, so a relationship is impossible. We talked like boyfriends, Skyped every nite, and we called each other babe and everything. I introduced him to sexting too and we talked sexual to each other quite a bit. All of the sudden though I just felt this disconncection beginning 6 days ago, until one nite we Skyped and I ended up in tears and he felt bad and we basically accepted we had no feasible way to have a relationship because of distance. Since that nite he doesn't make any special effort to talk to me anymore and I realize now that he texts me basically as a friend, and the "special" title I one had is now gone. I texted him like today and miss him a lot, and I miss talking to him everyday, its all we had done since we met a church camp a month ago. I see him in August as we are both on a Luthern Youth board, so we all meet in Atlanta. At one point me and him were talking bout all the cute stuff we would do, and now obviously its prob nomore, and now I don't know what to do. I feel so unfulfilled, and keep chasing guys and hitting it off, having sexual encounters, but end up with my heart broken in the end :( I don't know what to do about this empty space in my heart that's been here for so long.

LouBerry
July 16th, 2013, 12:42 AM
Let me tell you a story. There was a boy that was on V.T. a few years ago. I met him on Tumblr and we used to Skype a lot. He's gay and dating a boy that lived on the other side of the United States. They'd only met in person once or twice, but they made things work. It gets discouraging sometimes, but they always work hard to pull through. All they're hard work paid off, and a week ago, My friend flew to Cali to see his beloved again.

Don't let things like distance discourage you. Keep your heart open, and believe.

Hermes96
July 16th, 2013, 11:32 AM
i'd say to try and continue a close FRIENDSHIP with the first boy because he obviously already new you and if you let your friendship grow it heightens the chance of you to becoming boyfriend's or best friends both are great just don't push him into anything because i know from exsperance it will just drive him away and desiding he's strait belive me it will a lot more than it will if you just stay friend also he might not want to be boyfriends in till he works himself out wich is better than him going out with you. as for the other guy if he still is friend zoning you for more than a week leave it as just a friend ship. As for the fact your realtionships only last for small periods of time it seems to me that its just a coincidence so just don't put your self down you sound like a lovely and if they don't want a realtionship its their loss not yours . mesage me iof you need to vent at all

~ Aaron


P.s sorry about the spelling

dailydriver
July 22nd, 2013, 11:36 PM
keep your head up! ive tried the long distance thing before and its very hard to MAINTAIN. I feel ya

Biscuithead13
July 25th, 2013, 08:46 PM
Yeah see Im not sure long distance will give me what I want :/ Like I can be great friends with them and if the opportunity to visit ever presents itself then I think it can be great, but just too many what IF's