Is it best to stay quiet?

[Silent Tears]

I don't understand. I posted about how my father molested me for years, but stopped 6 months ago. He still treats me like crap. Why can't I force myself to tell anyone? I tell myself "If it happens again.. then I'll tell someone" It's like I still care about him, as my father. So, I'm afraid to speak up. I tell myself that's it's okay, because it hasn't happened in the past 7 months... as if that makes everything he did to me okay.

Why can't I just let go? I mean. I guess it's because he was the last family I had other than my brother... and my brother. If I tell someone, I'll be taking away his father to... I can't do that. Can I? I just imagine, me as a mother... and never wanting my child to be alone with him. I just... I don't know. Maybe, it's best to just move away at 18, and never look back.

[handle with care]

i understand you don't want to lose anymore of your family but you can't let yourself suffer anymore if he did it for all of those years who's to say he won't do it again you have suffered enough and you need to speak up and i know it's hard to but it's the best thing you can do. please prevent further suffering and tell someone you will be protecting you and your brother. you should not forgive him what he did to you makes him a monster and he doesn't deserve the blessing of children and you deserve better than him.

[Menime]

Hi, I was a member on here a few years ago and this website changed my life, Iv come back on here to help other people like me.

I know how hard this is for you, but you need to speak up, just remember that YOU have done NOTHING wrong, he is the person in the wrong, not you. It will be hard, I'm not going to pretend its going to be easy because it will be tough, but think about it, if your brother knew how he had hurt you would he want this man in his life? He might have stopped but what's to say he won't do it again, or hurt someone else.

Give me a message if you want to talk

Xx

[EternalSadness]

It's never best to stay quiet because then it'll only hurt you more by bottling it up inside! :( I agree with Menime, nothing here is your fault and I'm sure your brother would be on your side if he knew what went on.

[uglyinsideandout]

I understand having to stay quiet because I do too. It sucks but I can't send my father to jail. Everyone in my family would hate me even more. It's just easier to let him do what he wants to do. That's what I think anyway.

[Silent Tears]

I talked to my dad about some of it. He said that he knows what he did was wrong, and that he's sorry. At least, I know I won't have to go through any more of his shit. I still have nightmares, and cry myself to sleep over what happened. I decided not to tell anyone. Just get the hell out of here, when I can afford it.

[Happyguy1]

What he is doing is wrong, you know that, you are here one time only and so make the most of it, His behavior is not allowed and I prey you have the strength to talk to say a school counselor or some one you feel safe with and comfortable with who I hope can help you. Good Luck

[numbness]

I know it must be hard because you don't want to upset everyone however I think that it would be best to tell someone about it I know it can't be easy but if you could somehow tell yourself its for the best then it would be good

[Blood]

Sexual abuse is very hard to deal with, especially when someone close to you is doing it because, naturally, you're going to care about this person a lot.

Just because your father stopped molesting you 6 months ago doesn't make what he already did any better. The damage is done. He can't fix it, but you can. I know its really hard, but you need to tell someone. You don't want him doing this to other children. I know its a scary idea, but once you tell someone you're going to feel a lot better.

If you ever need anything I'm here. :cuddle:

[Croconaw]

Sometimes it's better to stay quiet. I hate to say it.

[alwinwarrens]

I am sorry to hear what has happen with you Silent Tears, as you have taken the courage to share it with us, I hope you find someone with whom you can share this personally. Cause though your father has promised not to molest/hurt you he has done all the damage that he could. And your saying your having a nightmares thats the proof of it.

[Its Pretty]

It is never okay to stay quiet. Your father has done terrible crimes and he has to pay. Any father who would rape their child does not deserve to see them.

[BreXD]

I don't understand. I posted about how my father molested me for years, but stopped 6 months ago. He still treats me like crap. Why can't I force myself to tell anyone? I tell myself "If it happens again.. then I'll tell someone" It's like I still care about him, as my father. So, I'm afraid to speak up. I tell myself that's it's okay, because it hasn't happened in the past 7 months... as if that makes everything he did to me okay.

Why can't I just let go? I mean. I guess it's because he was the last family I had other than my brother... and my brother. If I tell someone, I'll be taking away his father to... I can't do that. Can I? I just imagine, me as a mother... and never wanting my child to be alone with him. I just... I don't know. Maybe, it's best to just move away at 18, and never look back.

Silent Tears, I am very sorry that happened to you. I was also molested from the age of five until the age of thirteen, I am now 17. I still freak out when people touch me. I also have a severe fright of the dark. All because of a man who decided that I was his. You NEED to speak up somehow. I told my mother and since she was drugged up didnt care. She called me a "home-wrecking Wh***" She blamed me for his problem. You have to speak up. If you dont itll keep happening. I am here if ya need to talk. I am making my bad personal experiences beneficial by becoming a Social Worker. Id love to help you if you need it. You can just shoot me a personal message if youd like.

Sincerely
~BreXD~

[Silent Tears]

Silent Tears, I am very sorry that happened to you. I was also molested from the age of five until the age of thirteen, I am now 17. I still freak out when people touch me. I also have a severe fright of the dark. All because of a man who decided that I was his. You NEED to speak up somehow. I told my mother and since she was drugged up didnt care. She called me a "home-wrecking Wh***" She blamed me for his problem. You have to speak up. If you dont itll keep happening. I am here if ya need to talk. I am making my bad personal experiences beneficial by becoming a Social Worker. Id love to help you if you need it. You can just shoot me a personal message if youd like.

Sincerely
~BreXD~

Thanks. I actually talked to him about it a few months ago, and he tried to apologize and said he knew it was wrong of him and everything. It's stopped. The damage is done, but at least it won't happen again. I've decided to keep it to myself, because I know I'm not in any immediate danger. I'll move out when I'm 18, and do my best to move on. Maybe, one day I'll tell someone whom I trust. This just isn't the right time for me, to tell anyone. I'm not emotionally prepared for talking about it, you know? And, I'm definitely not prepared to have to deal with court or any legal stuff. If I wait till I'm an adult, then I won't have to deal with any of that. I'll just have to deal with talking to someone. Not any legal stuff.

[Silent Tears]

I just wanted to say thanks. Reading all of your advice is helping me right now. I've been considering telling someone. I keep telling myself that since he stopped doing it, I should stay quiet. But, just because he stopped molesting me, doesn't make it right. And, I think I might talk to someone soon. I'm not ready yet. I hope I will be soon though.

[Emily15_xoxo]

You should talk to somebody you trust, even if it is just a friend of yours. Someone you know who will not tell anyone. I'm sure you will feel a lot better knowing somebody knows about it but won't tell anyone.

[Katiya]

I know the feeling of keeping things inside and not telling. I hid my familya problems for years and years and frankly i still do because they are my parents and i feel incredibly guilty sayong something bad about them even if they wont ever know i said anything. My mom always said everyone would disown us if they heard me say this or that.

I understand the feeling. If you feel you can take it you can suck it up. But dont if its hurting you bad. And do talk to your brother and make very very sure nothings happening to him. Your brother shouldnt live there and neither should you but its your choice that you have to decide whats best for you.