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View Full Version : Harassed because of friend


MoonMan
June 29th, 2013, 10:14 PM
Stick with me here because this is a long story...

One of my long term friends has moved back to my city after 2 years of being away (moved elsewhere) and is currently attending my highschool. I hung out with him a lot during lunch, afterschool, and he had some of the same classes as me as well. He is a very introverted person and has a hard time making new friends despite him being a good guy once you get to know him. Even I would admit I found him very strange and stubborn when I first met him. He was bullied pretty much daily at my highschool and was disliked even to the point where people harassed me for even being around him. Namely insults and obnoxious teasing, with some group of kids physically threatening us once or twice when I told them to fuck off.

He came out as bisexual a couple years back and, of course, there were rumors at my school that I was gay as well and we were secretly sucking each other's dicks and what not despite him already having a boyfriend outside of our school and me being straight. I have actually had a couple of girls recently reject me because they thought I was gay and in a sexual relationship with him, so the rumors are spreading like wildfire to say the least. Usually I pay no mind to these kinds of things, in fact, they rarely bother me because I was never really popular in the first place so I could care less about my reputation (which was already shit before my friend showed up anyways).

The problem here is school just ended and my friend recently told me he thinks it would be better if we didn't hang out so much at school next year so I wouldn't get harassed for being around him. I tried explaining to him I'm not bothered by it, but he says he feels really guilty for it, and that his mind is made up that it would be for the best. Now, he doesn't reply to me online and we don't hang out anymore because I can never contact him, I'm assuming this is his way of distancing himself from me to make things easier next year.

We live far from each other and I have no way of transport to visit him because neither of our families currently have a car (money issues), and his mom (she's single and very, very strange) usually doesn't allow visitors anyways. While I do have other friends, he was a close friend of mine and I've known him for years so I would really prefer to still be his friend despite the bullying, but it seems like he's not allowing it.

I honestly have no clue what to do.

teen.jpg
June 29th, 2013, 11:26 PM
Reach out to him, and tell him you'll always be there for him when he needs you, and then get some distance from him. Not too much distance, but enough so he doesn't feel guilty anymore.

James Bond
June 29th, 2013, 11:33 PM
Reach out to him, and tell him you'll always be there for him when he needs you, and then get some distance from him. Not too much distance, but enough so he doesn't feel guilty anymore.

He can't reach out if he never answers and just ignores him.


Because you can't reach him, I would recommend you wait till the school year talked that way you can actually see him and tell him face to face. You've done all you can, and there's nothing more that can be done.

MoonMan
June 30th, 2013, 12:34 AM
He can't reach out if he never answers and just ignores him.


Because you can't reach him, I would recommend you wait till the school year talked that way you can actually see him and tell him face to face. You've done all you can, and there's nothing more that can be done.
I might try this. I think we should at least wait a little while to see how next year plays out before we do anything like basically stop being friends. Who knows, maybe next year will be different and we won't have to do this. Either way, I'm still kind of pissed considering I've known him for years and these idiots really got to him. In my opinion, if we stop hanging out then we basically let them win, and there's no guarantee they'll stop fucking with us anyways. However I'm not going to force him into feeling guilty and even more shittier than he has to, so we'll see...

MoonMan
June 30th, 2013, 12:38 AM
Reach out to him, and tell him you'll always be there for him when he needs you, and then get some distance from him. Not too much distance, but enough so he doesn't feel guilty anymore.
I've tried to reach out to him, but he basically stopped talking to me. I've always been there, even when we were threatened to get beat up or whatever, he knows this and I think that's part of what makes him feel guilty. He doesn't have any real friends besides me though, so I honestly don't know how this plan of his is going to work..

photojared
July 3rd, 2013, 09:16 AM
keep on and never stop and show him you care