Should I visit my mom in jail? Does she have the right to tell me what to do anymore?

[fmpro]

my mother is in jail for about eight months I believe for forgery related charges. My dad asked if I want to visit her sometime, he said she might appreciate some visits and it could be an "Educational experience" (what does he mean by that?) . I have no problem with my mother and other than this misdeed she was a good mother but I don't know if I should subject myself to go into a jail just to see her for a while. I am a 14 year old girl by the way. Again it is not because of my mother it is just the environment

also, my dad said I still have to listen to my mother when she gets out and even when she is jail if she calls and he wants her opinion on something he will listen. I don't understand how he can do this. I mean like I said I don't hate my mom or anything and had a good relationship with her but now that she committed a crime and considering she is the one in the punishment situation now, her telling what to do would be hypocritical

[Conqueror of Hearts]

Yes, it would be hypocrotical, but she's still your mum and you can if you want listen to her but you could also tell her how you feel. We all make mistakes, and she made a big one, but you could talk to her and ask her why she did that etc. Also, I guess your dad wants her opinion 'cause if he's the only one who will tell you what you can and can't do then if he mess up sth he'll be the only one to blame...aso, maybe they always decide about those things together so it's seems strange for him to decide himself. How long will your.mum be there? I know it's not easy to go there but I think it would mean alot to your mum. And by saying "educational experience" I guess he thinks that you could see how are things there, because you were never able to visit jail or sth like that.

[Sharona]

Well you should always respect your parents unless they are abusive etc to you or others
Her credibility is shot in regards to what's right and wrong though

Don't forget she brought you into this world, noirushed and supported you

[MoonMan]

She's still your mother and, by your description, a rather decent one who's made a very big mistake. It sounds like your father tells you these things in an attempt to keep you from dismissing your mom's opinion because she's in jail right now. It would be very hypocritical but then again, applying logic to parenting is about as useful as applying logic to dating. It just doesn't work because there's too much emotions involved. I would just go and visit her and at least give her the impression her opinion carries weight. There's nothing worse than knowing your child honestly doesn't care what you have to say, it's sort of like being disowned as a parent.

[Prince of Rome]

She is still your parent, but its up to you to listen and obey her.

You should visit her, she probably misses you very much.

We all make mistakes, so were all hypocritical at stuff, she just made a dumb mistake that she regrets greatly. It would only be hypocritical if she got sent to jail for parental reasons, like child abuse.

[fmpro]

My best friend joked ""maybe it will remind your mom how it feels when she punishes you. when she comes back, things might be a little different". Even though she is joking she has a point

[SkootuGurl]

She still has a whole lot more life experience than you and even the smartest people sometimes get things wrong, so it's defintiely not hypocritical of her to tell you what to do. And since she's still your legal parent she defintiely has the right.

And I think when your dad says educational experience, he means that it can be easy for us to do things we know are wrong when the punishment seems intangible, but if you were to get some first hand experience of it, it will help you to learn that your actions can have very serious consequences that can affect not just you but the people around you.

[Samual]

If it was my mother, I wouldn't care what she did. She is my mother and I would visit her everyday if I had to.

[GigglyAbby]

It's possible the "educational experience" he refers to is for you to see what jail is like so it may deter you from committing crimes. I see why you see her as a hypocrite -- but sadly until the day her parental rights become terminated [doesn't sound like it will in this case] -- she 's your mother and you need to respect her and hopefully forgive her for going to jail.

[teen.jpg]

Yes, it would be hypocrotical, but she's still your mum and you can if you want listen to her but you could also tell her how you feel. We all make mistakes, and she made a big one, but you could talk to her and ask her why she did that etc. Also, I guess your dad wants her opinion 'cause if he's the only one who will tell you what you can and can't do then if he mess up sth he'll be the only one to blame...aso, maybe they always decide about those things together so it's seems strange for him to decide himself. How long will your.mum be there? I know it's not easy to go there but I think it would mean alot to your mum. And by saying "educational experience" I guess he thinks that you could see how are things there, because you were never able to visit jail or sth like that.

Basically this.

And OMG another Ed Sheeran fan?! Yessss!

[jaxian rhyder]

iclly u should still listen to her on other matters

[llwoahll]

I think you should but honestly if u haven't forgiven her then just a wait a bit longer

[fmpro]

I am not going to lie not having my mom for a while will mean slightly more freedom so there is this sense of funniness. Not in a malicious type of way but more in a teasing type of way. Not because I hate her or dislike her. On the contrary I had a good relationship with her but I definitely find it kind of funny that my mom is in the punishment situation now and is taking orders from others and also it might give her a different perspective on certain things. She won't be there to hound me for details 24/7 and she can give me a lot of good advice from an outsiders perspective. She also won't be there to get me in trouble if you mess up so you might be able to tell her more and be more honest. Also because I know she is coming back in eight months and is not going away from forever or for years and years. I guess it is kind of childish to think that way but I cannot really help it but I honestly think it is OK of me to cope this way. In fact I think my parents will be glad I am taking it well and not being hysterical about it.

[britishboy]

you must visit her simply because shes your mum! it would be nice