budgiebudgie
December 19th, 2007, 12:18 AM
Umm... this is my first thread here, so I'm sorry if I'm not doing it right.
I only started noticing it more recently but I have a HUGE fear of confrontation.
For instance, when I was in fifth grade, my teacher took me outside of the classroom to talk to me about a math worksheet I hadn't turned in. She didn't yell at me or say anything mean, but I almost burst into tears when she was talking to me... and I did cry a little bit afterwards.
When they told us that teachers wouldn't ask us about missed assignments in middle/highschool I was thrilled because I thought nobody would be confronting me about that anymore. Well, they lied, much to my disappointment. :/
Then in ninth grade I liked a guy (but I'm painfully shy about this kind of thing so I never talked to him face to face). Somehow I got convinced that I should slip a note into his locker, so I did. A few notes later I made an email address and wrote it on a Post-It, which I put into his locker. He emailed me and we kind of talked for a little bit. Then, because I was really stupid and didn't attempt or was just too blind to keep my identity a secret, his friends confronted me. They asked me if I was the girl who liked him, and I wanted to lie and say I wasn't but I said I was.
His friend just said "Cool", but in my next class I was so mortified I started hitting myself in the head with a textbook and telling my friend I wanted to kill myself.
I don't think this is normal but I don't know what to do. :( If I think about being confronted by or confronting anyone, I panic. Does anyone else have this problem?
I only started noticing it more recently but I have a HUGE fear of confrontation.
For instance, when I was in fifth grade, my teacher took me outside of the classroom to talk to me about a math worksheet I hadn't turned in. She didn't yell at me or say anything mean, but I almost burst into tears when she was talking to me... and I did cry a little bit afterwards.
When they told us that teachers wouldn't ask us about missed assignments in middle/highschool I was thrilled because I thought nobody would be confronting me about that anymore. Well, they lied, much to my disappointment. :/
Then in ninth grade I liked a guy (but I'm painfully shy about this kind of thing so I never talked to him face to face). Somehow I got convinced that I should slip a note into his locker, so I did. A few notes later I made an email address and wrote it on a Post-It, which I put into his locker. He emailed me and we kind of talked for a little bit. Then, because I was really stupid and didn't attempt or was just too blind to keep my identity a secret, his friends confronted me. They asked me if I was the girl who liked him, and I wanted to lie and say I wasn't but I said I was.
His friend just said "Cool", but in my next class I was so mortified I started hitting myself in the head with a textbook and telling my friend I wanted to kill myself.
I don't think this is normal but I don't know what to do. :( If I think about being confronted by or confronting anyone, I panic. Does anyone else have this problem?