Becoming more friendly and open around people?

[unknownuser]

So way back when in Jr High I had some issues with some backstabbing and betraying friends... I completely withdrew from all my other friends because I was afraid that they would do the same thing to me.
So up until now, I've been withdrawn from people, have developed my own hobbies (that people my age probably don't really care for), have become selfish, secretive, quiet, and shy.
I would really like to change, but I don't know where to start. For a whole 3 years of highschool, I've been that quiet, non-social, nerd kid and that's what people know me as. Also, I'm not really into what I call "fluffy" activities like going to the movies, going out to eat, partying, or just fooling around, I like doing productive and serious things instead of just chilling out and having fun...*
I would love to magically make my last year of hs different and memorable, but like I've said, I don't know where to begin or how to act around people.

I would greatly appreciate any advice, thanks.

[Hybridoxidation]

Well, you're probably just serious about life, and not into those things that teenagers do .-. Based on you preferring to do more productive things rather than fooling around, which I think is a very good thing. When you get older, you won't be put under as much pressure to work, etc. If you don't enjoy going out, then don't do it.

As to how you can make your last year memorable.. I can't think of anyway.. You're already known as that quiet nerdy girl. Why change it? I wouldn't bother anyway, who cares about what people think of me. I'd look more forward to the future rather than trying to get myself remembered for the last year of high school.

[unknownuser]

As to how you can make your last year memorable.. I can't think of anyway.. You're already known as that quiet nerdy girl. Why change it? I wouldn't bother anyway, who cares about what people think of me. I'd look more forward to the future rather than trying to get myself remembered for the last year of high school.


Yes, I understand what you're saying here, I really shouldn't care what the others think, plus, I'll probably never see most of them ever after next year... But I feel that maybe I'm missing out a bit and an unhappy for that reason. I don't want to impress others, just learn to be a bit more open and loosen up a bit, you know?

[Hybridoxidation]

Yes, I understand what you're saying here, I really shouldn't care what the others think, plus, I'll probably never see most of them ever after next year... But I feel that maybe I'm missing out a bit and an unhappy for that reason. I don't want to impress others, just learn to be a bit more open and loosen up a bit, you know?

Hmmm. Well... I suppose that's up to you then, don't be as closed off as before. Try starting conversation with everyone more.. The rest is really up to you and how you try to socialize with everyone

[unknownuser]

Hmmm. Well... I suppose that's up to you then, don't be as closed off as before. Try starting conversation with everyone more.. The rest is really up to you and how you try to socialize with everyone

That's easier said then done, but thanks for your help.

[Hybridoxidation]

That's easier said then done, but thanks for your help.

Yeah, i know xD I have trouble socializing with people I don't know, but i'm really comfortable with people whom I know

[unknownuser]

Yeah, i know xD I have trouble socializing with people I don't know, but i'm really comfortable with people whom I know
Yes, same issue here... I guess my underlying issue is learning to trust people and getting close to them after having been betrayed by those who were my best friends for many years.

[Hybridoxidation]

Yes, same issue here...

Well, good luck then I suppose.

[unknownuser]

Well, good luck then I suppose.
Thanks.

[Kerser]

In only a year I don't think you'd suddenly be able to go partying and shit it's too late for that and you cannot change this outcome. Best you'd be able to do I reckon is just gradually talk a bit more to everyone whenever there's an opportunity, try work on not being so 'withdrawn from people' [Don't know how to help you here, google it m8]. probs have to work on your self-esteem and confidence and look more energetic & lively.

Don't believe all people are untrustworthy and will back stab you, that's untrue. You shouldn't think like that - just because a few people treated you like that, you assume everyone else is like that, yeah?

I really wouldn't know what to do if I was in your situation lol, I don't think you have many options

Look at this list of mental distortions and look at 'over-generalizations' http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_distortion. Identifying and working on these issues may be your first step, perhaps you should have a look at this book it will help in one way or another: http://thepiratebay.sx/torrent/8036843/David_D._Burns_-_Feeling_Good__The_New_Mood_Therapy_[EPUB]