FantaSauce
May 28th, 2013, 09:48 PM
So i've been thinking a lot about education and the whole aspect of working to get somewhere, But what does this work achieve in the end?
I've realised that so far i've spent from 6-20 years of age in Education, To finish my degree i'll be 22, So if i live to the old age of 100, That's nearly a quarter of my life gone already, And for what? Ive experienced much hurt as a child in the way of shitty relationships, Self harm, Depression and family feud. What will come in the next 20-30 years that makes it all worth it.
I feel like the education i am working for will mean nothing as soon as i finish other than to get a job that i will spent another 30+ years working my way up through, And for what? better life aspects? But when all your life consists of is working your way up a ladder what is it really worth?
The idea that we spend most of our days working to be better but there is no real end result. To put in perspective it would be like saying to someone complete Skyrim or Aion or WoW, There is no real endgame it just continues until you get bored or you die.
So then realistically what really is there to live for when the stuff you do in a day to day life, even though you may enjoy it, only gives you things that are material and end up being wasted due to your life decisions.
This is also affected by the educational system which encourages you to do better and belittles you when you do poor, this is not helpful in the long run and since we are so pressured into making so many decisions when we are young that we might end up regretting when we are older and more wise. The whole university experience feels like they are trying to get you to decide now what you want to be when there is at least 60 years of your life left when you still don't know what you want to do with your life.
Also what if i don't know and i chose a job that might not settle with in the long run, The current job that i want to go into maintains a lot of responsibility as it will be criminal examination of evidence in relation to majoritively cyber crime, this can mean that a slip up on my part will let a horrific criminal walk free. Is that something that i could life with, I Don't really know yet. even if that is the field that i want to go into.
This is kind of a rant and if the Mod's decide that it belongs somewhere else feel free to move it over.
I put this here because it feels like this is fueling a lot of depression in me lately and i have been finding less and less joy in everyday life, I've been looking up the diffrences in many different drugs and on possibilities of taking them due to their ease of access. I know i shouldn't and i will do my best to stay clean but it feels like there is no way out other than to get fucked up or to end it all
If you got this far thank you for reading and feel free to leave a comment
I've realised that so far i've spent from 6-20 years of age in Education, To finish my degree i'll be 22, So if i live to the old age of 100, That's nearly a quarter of my life gone already, And for what? Ive experienced much hurt as a child in the way of shitty relationships, Self harm, Depression and family feud. What will come in the next 20-30 years that makes it all worth it.
I feel like the education i am working for will mean nothing as soon as i finish other than to get a job that i will spent another 30+ years working my way up through, And for what? better life aspects? But when all your life consists of is working your way up a ladder what is it really worth?
The idea that we spend most of our days working to be better but there is no real end result. To put in perspective it would be like saying to someone complete Skyrim or Aion or WoW, There is no real endgame it just continues until you get bored or you die.
So then realistically what really is there to live for when the stuff you do in a day to day life, even though you may enjoy it, only gives you things that are material and end up being wasted due to your life decisions.
This is also affected by the educational system which encourages you to do better and belittles you when you do poor, this is not helpful in the long run and since we are so pressured into making so many decisions when we are young that we might end up regretting when we are older and more wise. The whole university experience feels like they are trying to get you to decide now what you want to be when there is at least 60 years of your life left when you still don't know what you want to do with your life.
Also what if i don't know and i chose a job that might not settle with in the long run, The current job that i want to go into maintains a lot of responsibility as it will be criminal examination of evidence in relation to majoritively cyber crime, this can mean that a slip up on my part will let a horrific criminal walk free. Is that something that i could life with, I Don't really know yet. even if that is the field that i want to go into.
This is kind of a rant and if the Mod's decide that it belongs somewhere else feel free to move it over.
I put this here because it feels like this is fueling a lot of depression in me lately and i have been finding less and less joy in everyday life, I've been looking up the diffrences in many different drugs and on possibilities of taking them due to their ease of access. I know i shouldn't and i will do my best to stay clean but it feels like there is no way out other than to get fucked up or to end it all
If you got this far thank you for reading and feel free to leave a comment