Self Harm Calendar

[japanman]

I am not a great guy. I am just some guy in the big scheme of things. I am unimportant and useless. I deserve what I do to myself.
unimportant :eek: useless :eek: . You are important you are usefull you dont deserve pain. I know you can stop addi.:console:

[Axellance]

you most definitly do not deserve anything close to what you do to yourself!!!

[Zephyr]

Stay strong Addison and Lance, I know you guys can overcome it = )

[Atonement]

....

[The Batman]

Addison your a great person and we all know that, you help so many people on this site and everyone on here loves you. You don't deserve any of it I know your hurting because I can see it in your posts but I just want you to know that we're all here for you no matter what.

[Kaleidoscope Eyes]

Never give up, Addison. I know you, I know you're strong enough to keep working at this. Just take a deep breath, and keep pushing forward. :)

[Zephyr]

Don't give up on yourself.
Addison, I truly think that you have what it takes to quit = )
:hug:

[electric7rocker]

i am so fucking pissed right now i want to slit my fucking throat.

[NextToNormal]

7 shallow on my upper arm

[Kaleidoscope Eyes]

:hug:

Rowan, slitting your throat won't help anything. We're all here for you, please talk to us. We want to help you feel better. :)

Walkin_contradiction, stay strong. You can beat this. I know it.

[electric7rocker]

another scratch on my leg... reopened several others... got high... i hate this week.

[theOperaGhost]

Rowan, please don't slit your throat, people would miss you. :hug:

Stay strong walking contradiction. :hug:

Addison, you can stop, I hope you start to feel better about yourself, because Jessi and Steph are right, people here love you.

[Atonement]

....

[Malcolm Tucker]

I cut for the first time yesterday. Deep but no blood. yet...... I want somebody to care. I don't know why. I feel a weight on my chest all the time. I act like im ok. But im not

[Atonement]

NO! Don't start.... stay away from it! Once you are in, you are lost for a long time. Get out now. Dont do it again. I understand what you are feeling, but there are better ways to handle it.

[Kaleidoscope Eyes]

So, Michael, tell someone. Tell a friend,a parent, a teacher, a school counselor. The sooner people know you're not ok, the sooner they can work to fix it. I know it can seem like the hardest thing in the world to do, but it could be one of the best moves you ever make. There really is help for you out there. :)

[theOperaGhost]

Please get help Michael. We don't want you to hurt yourself. Please don't cut again.

[Malcolm Tucker]

I haven't. Yet. I don't want help. I realized that I'm not worth anyone's time.... I did scratch my arms to hell in P.E. No one noticed. They just laughed at my mistakes :(

[Kaleidoscope Eyes]

You are worth it, Michael. And there are people out there who WANT to help you, whose job it is to help you. Please, get help now, before things get any worse. :hug:

[iJack]

:hug: dont cut, we love you :hug:

[theOperaGhost]

Listen to Jessi, Michael. Everyone is worth something to somebody. We want you to get help and start feeling better.

[Atonement]

....

[iJack]

Good job atonement, :woot:

[theOperaGhost]

Keep that attitude Addison! I hope you never hurt yourself again!

[brokenfaerie]

hi. i'm new. i'd like to say i'm 4 months 13 days cut free. my biggest fear is to start again. i've been a cutter on and off for the last 6 years and i finally hit rock bottom while in a in adolescent psyche ward last november. i had snuck in 7 or 8 blades in the space where my batteries go in my calculator and in my math book. i went on a full and bloody rampage on myself and then i turned myself in. i scared myself really bad and haven't touched a blade since. i live with the scars everyday. i fear what i'll have to do for prom. i'm afraid what i'll do as a camp councelor this summer. but my biggest fear is cutting again.

i hope you guys quit too. it only gets worse and worse. don't wind up on the floor of psyche ward bathroom floor covered in blood crying and needing many many stiches.

________
edit- i thought this was the anti-si thread. oh well you guy could still use my experience as motivation.

[theOperaGhost]

Good job at not cutting for over 4 months, that's something to be proud of! Keep it up!

[Atonement]

....

[iJack]

Addison, you didnt fail, it is a habit, habits are hard to break, but when you find the need to cut, do something else (http://www.virtualteen.org/forums/showthread.php?t=22199) :hug: you are not stupid, dont think that, think positive, you can quit! :hug2:

[theOperaGhost]

your not stupid Addison, you just needed to do it.

[NextToNormal]

addison, youre not stupid. everyone makes mistakes sometimes. this just means that you have a new chance to do better. i know you can do it.

[brokenfaerie]

mastery is getting up after falling down. you relapsed but you didn't fail. failing is saying screw it and never quitting.

[iJack]

mastery is getting up after falling down. you relapsed but you didn't fail. failing is saying screw it and never quitting.

Powerful, rep +(yesterday)

[brokenfaerie]

i learned it in my DBT [dialectical behavioral therapy] class. its something i've been trying to apply to my life.

[electric7rocker]

got high and scratched myself till i felt it.

i miss my arms so much..

[brokenfaerie]

thats ok. i don't fully count that. i found i cut in my sleep a couple weeks ago and therapist told me not to worry about that but i can't sleep with scissors in my bed anymore. don't ask i fell asleep while doing a project. hehe. just try to move on from it. distract yourself when your high. or don't get high. in know thats not what you want to hear. but i think you should pick your battles. try to quit just one for now. then once you can move on to the next. if you scratch yourself when your high maybe stop getting high and then quit cutting. its up to your because ultimately its your choice. i wish you the bestest of luck!!!

[strongheart]

i was at 3.5 weeks. then sunday, the day before school started again after spring break 40 cuts happened. and they hurt. and i can't figure out why it had to happen. it's like another person cutting.
:(

[theOperaGhost]

It's okay. You'll get better. Stay strong. :hug:

[electric7rocker]

when you say "get better," what exactly does that mean?

[theOperaGhost]

I hope you start to feel better, that's what I mean. I'm just not good with words.

[Malcolm Tucker]

3 times on my right forearm . Only can see 2 scars though

[Bobby]

What triggered this Michael?

[Malcolm Tucker]

Months and months of me denying that all is not ok.....

[Bobby]

Stay strong. Don't give in again.

[Malcolm Tucker]

I hope I don't. I will eventually.

[theOperaGhost]

I hope you don't Michael. Stay strong. You don't have to give in.

[haibekah]

7 cuts
shallow
on my leg


I feel kinda silly saying that.
Hopefully ill get more comfortable telling people how i feel.

[Atonement]

....

[electric7rocker]

a couple times.. top of left wrist. fairly shallow. nothing is ever enough anymore.. i need it where i cant have it... i cant wait till winter.

[brokenfaerie]

hugs for everyone!!!

[theOperaGhost]

Keep trying to stop Addison. :hug: for bekah and :hug: for electric7rocker

[bleedingheartizzie]

116 cuts deep and shallow left arm

[theOperaGhost]

If you need to talk izzie, just PM me. :hug:

[electric7rocker]

>< ive been trying to engage myself in more dangerous activities so that i can have excuses for the scars and cuts... ones my parents will accept.....

headaches are still here... i want to cut to get rid of them... or get high. i havent yet.. but its haunting me.

[bleedingheartizzie]

8 cuts on both arms shallow

[electric7rocker]

couple on my right leg... shallow... it wasnt working

scratched my arm...... reallyy had to try hard not to do more cuz ppl would notice.... x'[

i need it now.

[theOperaGhost]

If a few don't work, why do a lot work? Just wondering. Please don't give in, Rowan. Keep fighting it.

[electric7rocker]

>< went back and scratched up more of my arm.... not bleeding... just a little red and barely swollen............


desperately want more

[electric7rocker]

more scratches on my arm.... probably got the equivalent of one drop of blood...


felt sooo amazing though.. had to stop to avoid leaving marks (probably still will though)

[bleedingheartizzie]

11 cuts on right leg

[bleedingheartizzie]

8 cuts on my right hip

[BeautifulSilence]

Scratched the word's "IF I COULD" on my left arm. No blood, but it's gonna be there tomorrow.

[theOperaGhost]

:hug:s for you all.

[ShatteredWings]

small cut on my wrist (wtf, i rarely do that!!!!)....then i pulled some hair out :(

[electric7rocker]

i stopped keeping track how many scratches i have... but theyre all on my arm... and im wearing sweatshirts in the summer again



i know itll only get worse from here

[The Batman]

Come on guys both of you have to be strong and try and find some constructive ways to get rid of your anger and depression.

[theOperaGhost]

Just try to take aggresion out on something else like a pillow or something. Don't take it out on yourself or on someone else.

[electric7rocker]

im worried because i dont want to end up in a mental hospital again.. but it feels so good. i havent since.. well yesterday morning... i had to resist today. right here on my arms is the best ive ever had it. and that relief might be worth a lockdown.. even though i know nothing will change i just want to be ok....

wow like all my thoughts are contradicting eachother. i dont even know what im saying anymore.. but i know things will get worse......

[Zephyr]

Do what's right and healthy for yourself hun.

[NextToNormal]

i started biting again after like 5 months. its pretty bad..

[Malcolm Tucker]

Kell you stopped for 5 months, you can do it again, I know you can :hug:

[ShatteredWings]

i started biting again after like 5 months. its pretty bad..

...i thought i was the only one who did that....*huggies*

[silentc0re]

26 times right arm
Shallow

[BeautifulSilence]

- Nails dug deep into skin 13 times
- Numerous shallow(ish) cuts on various places of left arm
- 4 burns to left hand
- 2 burns to hip
- Split open then scabbing from the "IF I COULD"
- Carved 26 stars into legs

However still very little blood, as it makes me faint.

[electric7rocker]

a bunch more scratches on my arm....
earlier today i had felt so good that my scars were fading..... then i made more

[Justwondering]

~Twice
~Right arm
~Shallow

Dont know why, Was the happiest I could ever be on sunday, and then got confused/mixed feelings and got depressed about some stuff. Havent done it since grade 8 and dont know why I did it today.

-------------
Msg me if you feel like you can help (Subject: Depression, Mixed Feelings about a friend)

[AndMyScarsRemindMe..]

Hey, I'm a new member but thought i'd add onto the calender
i guess it makes you feel kinda better in a way
anyways

after 2 and a half weeks!!


13 times, Guess it is an unlucky number...
right upper arm
deep


xx

[Malcolm Tucker]

once on my right forearm, i thought i could stop i cant , i cant :(

[theOperaGhost]

You can stop Michael. You only did it once, so you have selfcontrol. I know you can do it, just don't give up.

[Malcolm Tucker]

I can't im sorry. Im a fucking idiot. Each time i cut i am digging myself deeper into a hole and i cant stop.....

[theOperaGhost]

You're not a fucking idiot. You can stop, it's just takes a lot of determination, which any depressed person is lacking. Just don't let people bother you, which is hard, but possible. You are stronger than this, you can beat this.

[bleedingheartizzie]

10 times left wrist shallow
2 times right wrist deep with stiches

[bleedingheartizzie]

12 times left hip

[Malcolm Tucker]

5 times, on my right forearm. I'm considering something awful :( I really do need help now.

[theOperaGhost]

Don't do anything foolish Michael. Get help before you can't get it anymore.

[Malcolm Tucker]

I almost did it again last night. I took the corner of a mirror to my arm, I scratched myself, but no cut :(

[theOperaGhost]

It's good that you didn't actually cut yourself, so that is progress. You've just got to get rid of the feelings that make you want to cut. Scratching is better than cutting, but it could probably lead to actually cutting. Keep trying to stop.

[BeautifulSilence]

Headbutted the wall until my head was numb.
Punched the wall until my knuckles were bleeding.
Pinched myself an uncountable amount of times.
Tightened belt around my throat until I was dizzy.

And tomorrow it woud've been a month / four weeks. Atleast I do feel a lot better.

[japanman]

you can hold in luara i know you can you just gotta resist.

[theOperaGhost]

:hug: You went a long time without it, now you can make it longer. Just don't quit trying to quit.

[electric7rocker]

a couple times... rather shallow-medium, not long...
face/forehead Dx
didnt feel it... when i did it felt good
"headwounds look worse than they are.."

[Malcolm Tucker]

Once on my right arm again.... Wow the scars are starting to show :| I didn't feel a thing.

[chunkymonky30281]

june 11, 2008

2 left arm

medium

(went 2 weeks w/o cutting) just had a bad day

[The Batman]

well i just did it for the first time 2 on my left arm right near the shoulder i just couldn't take it anymore and the worse part is all I could think of was next time go deeper. I'm sorry guys.

[Hyper]

well i just did it for the first time 2 on my left arm right near the shoulder i just couldn't take it anymore and the worse part is all I could think of was next time go deeper. I'm sorry guys.

Don't be sorry for us. You know it aint right and you know it wont help you in the long run..

Thats all I can say feels like I'm a record player but some things just stay the same.

[theOperaGhost]

Since it was your first time, it now shouldn't be hard to stop. Just try to find a different way to take out any frustrations or bad feelings. There are better, safer things to do than to cut. So please stop while you still can.

[SirRawrsalot]

4 medium cuts on my right arm. 2 deeper ones on my left

[SirRawrsalot]

(sorry for double posting :( )

5 deeper cuts on my left arm and I'm probably just going to add onto that. >.< wtf

[ShatteredWings]

Since it was your first time, it now shouldn't be hard to stop. Just try to find a different way to take out any frustrations or bad feelings. There are better, safer things to do than to cut. So please stop while you still can.

very true. stop BEFORE you get adicted

[theOperaGhost]

(sorry for double posting :( )

5 deeper cuts on my left arm and I'm probably just going to add onto that. >.< wtf

Try hard to find something else to do to keep your mind off of cutting. Please don't add to the 5 today, fight the urge. You can do it.

[SirRawrsalot]

thank you, but sadly (literally) 30 seconds after I had done it\

only 1 medium cut on my left arm.

I'm sorry :(

[-Silence]

Don't be sorry.
What happened?

[SirRawrsalot]

I'm just being a dumbass. I'm used to it by now. I'm just a little disappointed with myself...

[-Silence]

"I'm just a little disappointed with myself..."

That's understandable, but look at it this way, it was just one that was medium, not 50 shallow ones, not 3 deep ones just one medium one. I'm not trying to put it down but it could have been alot worse which you obviously know, but hang in there!

:hug:

[SirRawrsalot]

Thanks, but I'm not sure if you read a few posts before that, It's that plus "5 deeper cuts on my left arm" for today so far.

[-Silence]

Thanks, but I'm not sure if you read a few posts before that, It's that plus "5 deeper cuts on my left arm" for today so far.

I did, but it could have been alot more on top of those five, if you know what I mean.

[SirRawrsalot]

I know what you're talking about pretty well. I still suck ass at stopping. I can't even reduce the number of cuts. It's normally around 6 just about every god damn day.

[-Silence]

When you have found something else instead of cutting, stopping will be much easier. Now I'm not saying it's easy, but you can't stop and you can barely reduce it until you have something else to replace it. Even then relapsing a little bit is very likely.

Sorry, I don't mean to sound as if I'm preaching.

[SirRawrsalot]

No, you aren't. You're right, but I'm not going to find anything that will distract me from cutting, unless I speak to God or Morgan Freeman... Honestly when I really wanted to stop last year I thought of the same thing, think of something else. Look how well I did.

[-Silence]

Hehe. I love Morgan Freeman!

Last year, did you when the urges came did you just try to think of something else or did you go out and do some activity to get your mind off it, writing, talking, art, exercise?

I know for me what helped alot is a part of cutting for me was about control, when I knew that I wanted to cut, I'd get in my car, put a song on repeat that expressed how I felt (I always had mad and sad songs) and I'd just keep driving until the urge was gone. I'd have the windows down, sing along, and going about 90-95 mph just going north. When I was calm enough I'd stop at a rest stop get something to drink and get off at the next exit to come back home. That helped me alot.

But really hun, you just gotta find what works for you, and be patient.

It'll only work until your ready for it to work.

[SirRawrsalot]

I just read most of the time. I'm the kind of person who starts reading and doesn't stop until they finish the book or fall asleep, but then as soon as I'm done I need to cut and eventually I just gave in. The longest I've gone without cutting for 4 years is a few days. I'm almost completely dependent on it. So I really doubt I'll be able to stop anytime soon ... Thanks though. I guess I have nothing to lose by trying to control myself. I love Morgan Freeman too. lol

[SirRawrsalot]

(again, sorry for double posting)
3 medium cuts on my right arm...

[chunkymonky30281]

13
left arm
medium

[Ryandel]

June 20*
7 Times:
Left Arm 6
Right Arm 1
2 deep , 5 shallow/ enough to scar

[SirRawrsalot]

Well, I fucked up. I went almost 4 days.

8 medium cuts on my right arm and 3 deep ones on my left. Too much stress today... :(

[Ryandel]

4 deep ones today on my left... Just needed release of major stress.

[Malcolm Tucker]

Please guys you can stop. I know you all can! :) You have to have faith that things will pick up:)

[Malcolm Tucker]

Guys im sorry. I cut once. Deepest so far :(

[jma94]

Aww, Sorry to hear that,

Well, Here's five months down the drain.

Han't counted yet,
Left leg
Medium.

I guess I'll have to start all over. :[

[theOperaGhost]

Good luck this time jma94. You can do it. Five months is a long time, so it's not completely down the drain. If you can go long, you can go longer next time.

[jma94]

Thanks. I hope I have the ambition to do it again. I don't really think I will though. Maybe. I feel like I have nothing to work for. I've lost interest in things. I care a lot less these days... That probably led to the relapse.

[theOperaGhost]

The same thing happens to me every summer. Not going to lie, I've never cut, but I know the feeling of not caring about anything and losing interest in everything. I'm sure things will get better and your interests will start to come back. Keep a positive outlook on things.

[jma94]

I want to. I'm not exactly a posative person. As much as I try, I always end up being the negative person. ><

And good for you, not cutting and all. All I've gotten out of this is scared arms and legs. I can't belive I did it again. I feel horrible.

[Malcolm Tucker]

16 times on my arm, small little scratches, weird thing is that I only have scars from two. I just cracked. I don't even remember why I did it. I don't even think I knew then

[Rutherford The Brave]

shoulder, really deep....

[krystalm]

2 medium deep on wrist
and 3 medium size burns

had a mental break down, and my mother came home yelling and i'm inadequate in all i do.

[jma94]

Sorry to hear that krystalm. I'm sure your mother is wrong. Stay strong. Think positive.

[Ryandel]

12 deep on my left arm
6 deep on my right arm
3 medium on my left leg

I'm tired on putting a smile everyday. When I know that none of them are ever real.
This is probably the last time i'll cut myself. I'm done with it all. the lies, the deception, it's just too self-taxing. I'm done.

[ShatteredWings]

ryndel, be done with the CUTTING bu not with the LIVING. i identify these things to easliy. you can stop. its okay to show your feling sometimes, to not just hide away everyting.

:hug2:


kgtm(hwats ur name?), sholder? what were you doing..

[SirRawrsalot]

Over my week long vacation I cut around 20 - 30 times, a lot on my arms and 6 of those are on my right leg.

[theOperaGhost]

Try to stop, Elliot, you can do it. Was it a bad vacation? Or was it a school vacation or something? Try to find an alternative way to let out your feelings and emotions, bud.

[SirRawrsalot]

I've tried that for just about 4 years. And yeah, it was a bad "vacation". I honestly think the only way I'll ever stop is to either commit suicide or go into a psych ward, and I favor the first over the second.

2 more on my right arm today.

[Ryandel]

I promised no more, but 2 more on my left. Very deep and wide.... F**king someone.

[theOperaGhost]

I've tried that for just about 4 years. And yeah, it was a bad "vacation". I honestly think the only way I'll ever stop is to either commit suicide or go into a psych ward, and I favor the first over the second.

2 more on my right arm today.

You shouldn't favor suicide over a psych ward. A psych ward might suck, but it will help you. If you need help, you have to get it. Maybe going to a psych ward will help you permanently. After a time there, you might never want to harm yourself anymore. Get help before you even think about killing yourself.

[SirRawrsalot]

Or it will make me even more insane than I already am. I really wouldn't consider a psych ward. Although I think that it has a possibility of help me, but it's a very small chance.


1 big gash on my right wrist (It hurts really badly to even type with it so I'm doing it all with my left hand) and 7 pretty deep cuts on my right leg.

[ShatteredWings]

guys, you can make it. just keep trying. don't go near whatever u use to hurt youself!

[Techno Monster]

I haven't been putting my "Self harm" Stuff down, so.... Here we go:

7 Days ago~ 8-12 Mild-Deep stomach... I am pretty much ok now, I only cut to keep from killing myself, because my mom doesn't believe me when I tell her I am feeling suicidal.

[theOperaGhost]

:hug: What happened?

[SirRawrsalot]

I bet (99.9% sure) that if your mother saw those cuts she'd haul you to a therapists.

Edit:

only 4 medium cuts to my right arm...I'm kind of glad it isn't 8, 9 or 10 like it usually is. :D lol

[Ryandel]

July 4th 08
Because I hurt a friend...
2 on left arm
mid-deep

[hobo]

howd you hurt your friend? and if he's any kind of friend, he wouldnt want you to hurt yourself.

[Malcolm Tucker]

I hate this holiday. I have nothin to cut with. I used the back of my phone to make one small scratch. Everyone wont stop fightin. I wìsh i was gone.

[jma94]

I was on vacation and... I cut a lot. 20+ times, right leg, medium

But on a good note, that was a week ago and i haven't cut since

[Ryandel]

howd you hurt your friend? and if he's any kind of friend, he wouldnt want you to hurt yourself.

Ya, but still... there's reasons

[-Silence]

Nineteen, mostly shallow.

I'm afraid I'm going to fall back into this, I got too much relief out of it.

[SirRawrsalot]

Please don't. You can stop yourself. Get some willpower. You have to think about positives. If you can't find any then get some. Positive is the key. If you want to rant, make a thread or PM someone (i have a good 2 hours to be on), do anything to distract yourself. 19 is a lot. Even if they aree shallow. Why are you so stressd?

[SirRawrsalot]

Damn. You need to stop. You have to learn to take your mind off it. Because, trust me, you 're heading down hill. 50 in one night is pretty bad. It doesn't get much worse without dying. You have to talk to somebody either on here or a therapist before it gets any worse. Please. Just talk to someone. I'm on for a good 6 hours and there are therapists and tons of other helpful members too.

[SirRawrsalot]

Well you know what. 9 months will do you good. I was in an adolescent unit for 14 months. from 10 to 11 and it saved my life from being a complete hellhole. I think you should fess up to your therapist. It will save you. Trust me. You wont do much good for the world if you're dead. Just consider it. What's better?

1) continuing to cut and not being safe in the unit. Eventually getting so depressed you attempt suicide and either fail and go for even longer or die.

2) tell your therapist go for nine months and get a fresh start. After the nine months of monitoring it will be so easy to stop.

[electric7rocker]

20-30 ish
medium, not deep enough
a lot more blood than usual
i hate to say it but.. it rocked.

[SirRawrsalot]

...you also need to stop. Because 20 wont be enough. Next is 30 then 45 then like 60. What is bothering you so much that you are resorting to self harm?

[Ryandel]

1 very shallow one on my right arm seeing as my left is not recovered.

[electric7rocker]

ive been past 100
tonight i was rushed

i dont know whats happening
im just.. alone

[Ryandel]

We can be alone together =P damn I prmised not to cut anymore too.

[electric7rocker]

i promised myself 14 oopses ago

[SirRawrsalot]

And I offered to help you alex. And so did Nick and Sam. And I still want to help. Cutting may feel ok now, but long term it is making it worse. Just think about that. I don't have to help you and I dont want to force it, but think about how much better cutting is going to make your life in...lets say a year. How upset your friends and family will be discovering this.

[Ryandel]

Promised to my brother no more... I fail.

[SirRawrsalot]

Messing up is a chance to start fresh. With new confidence and motives. Don't give up on one slip up. Just aim to go even longer without cutting and eventually you wont cut. And everyone breaks a promise, but what are you going to do to make it up? That's what matters.

[Ryandel]

There's an internal feeling that's indescribable, Also an it's like an orgasmic feeling. A high when a person usually cuts. It's become someone.

[SirRawrsalot]

I know that feeling. But the "hang-over" from it is awful. I just...don't want to be pushy, but reverting back to cutting isn't good for anyone. Cutting can't change how you feel only hide it temporarily. You need to accept how you feel and make a healthy outlet for it. Or just distract yourself a different way. Get the urge to cut and do something you love (in your case alex, photos and music.).

[Oblivion]

Im so sorry i wasnt there Alex!
Why didnt you talk about it in chat?
We wanted to help you through it
Or at least PM me? I said i was open for anything?

[SirRawrsalot]

Don't get on his case too much about it.

[electric7rocker]

*sigh*
i want more already

[Ryandel]

guys just please drop it. I made enough "hysterics" as someone has already said.

[Oblivion]

Ok
I hope you feel better

[SirRawrsalot]

Didn't Sam say that? He wasn't talking about you though. (if indeed you are talking about Sam). I'll drop it, but please just think about long term. That's all I'll say. If you change your mind feel free to PM me because I really don't feel like seeing another person go down from cutting.

Rowan, don't. Please. I'm literally begging you. Resisting one temptation is the first step to resisting others. Do anything to distract yourself. Tallk, music, games, whatever works.

I feel like I'm nagging so sorry about that.

[Atonement]

....

[SirRawrsalot]

I never really took the time to see how many members cut. It amazes me...

[Oblivion]

Me too. If anyone ever wants to talk about their cutting, my PM box is open.

[Atonement]

I never really took the time to see how many members cut. It amazes me...

I surprised you?

[Oblivion]

You surprised me.
You seem upbeat and happy all the time
And then i see you cut medium deep multiple times

[Ryandel]

Didn't Sam say that? He wasn't talking about you though. (if indeed you are talking about Sam)

Quite disturbing how he defines self mutilation. Oh well, we all have our reasons. And curring is quite better than what most people have in mind

[Oblivion]

Sam tries to help. He just doesn't like it when people reject his help, because it turns into a big thing.

But hes a good guy and he tries to help.

You have to decide whether you want it or not

[Ryandel]

I rejected his help for my own reasons. I rather not get involved with Sam, seeing as these "hysterics" and " teenage drama" is quite in his distaste. I'm not saying I do not want his help. I just don't want his help in THIS situation. As I asked in my thread, I said someone to talk to. I didn't post my problem seeing as it is much more bothersome. I can only confine to a person I trust. As you can see I bothered many people already with my problem.

[Oblivion]

No! We arent bothered
Simply curious and trying to help

[Ryandel]

Nick. Please drop it now. I know you are trying to help. But there's only a few people that I feel I can trust with this problem. Maybe soon I'll tell you or come to you for guidance. But please for now, stop prying.

[SirRawrsalot]

I'm fine with not wanting Sam's help. Sam can cope. All that matters is you finding someone you can trust and expressing your problems to them. That's all I care about at the moment.

And addison, my jaw literally dropped. I was almost in shock. I was going to post "wtf why does every seemingly content person cut?"


Edit: Okay now I'm done. sorry

[Atonement]

....

[theOperaGhost]

Ok, guys drop it, please...

:hug: Addison, I was hoping you had stopped, I hadn't seen your name in here in a while.

[SirRawrsalot]

I hadn't seen his name the entire time I was on VT. (which isn't that long..like a month) He surprised me.

[electric7rocker]

i didnt do more
instead i watched heroes online
(amazingly confusing)
my leg still stings but feels amazing

[ShatteredWings]

hey, rowan, wanna talk a little? hope you all are gonna be okay


i'm shocking myself that i haven't done anything lately...

[electric7rocker]

i think im ok now
well
not ok, but i can resist today

[ShatteredWings]

yeah, tahts my thoughts today.. i think i can make it[think...], butsometimes it helps to get it all out

[Atonement]

....

[SirRawrsalot]

1 cut... depth is being kept to myself.

[krystalm]

i broke my complete self harm, i'd been sober for a couple ofweeks, but ive been high for the past two days. =/ i hate this.

[Atonement]

....

[iJack]

13 deep. Legs. Sorry.

Dont be, just try not to do it again. We ALL care for you, all of us. We dont want anything to happen to you.

[theOperaGhost]

I don't want to talk about it.

I have to put off a physical now, because I did myself too far in.
I need to have it, because I'm still in severe pain in a certain place, and getting that physical is the only half-ass chance I have of having the surgery.

I fuck up everything.

You don't fuck everything up, everything keeps fucking you up. Sorry.


Sorry, Addison (which I know you don't want to hear).

[SirRawrsalot]

7 deep right upper arm 2 medium left upper arm

[japanman]

*sigh* me no good at this kinda help but hey nothings better than support here it goes


Elliot have ya tried a hobbie that might take yo mind off of it?

[SirRawrsalot]

lol yes. Normally what works is work, but I had a really difficult night. It's all fine now.

[japanman]

Ok good glad to hear ya fine now ^_^

[electric7rocker]

elliot how far did you make it?

now you know you can make it that far
this time try for longer, i know you can do it :)

[Atonement]

....

[ShatteredWings]

i realize i'm rarely any help, but..

whats wrong?

[Malcolm Tucker]

I cut once on my arm, I have no idea why, with a super-sharp kitchen knife. I hate myself for it.

[SirRawrsalot]

4 deep cuts on my right arm

[Malcolm Tucker]

3-4 On my right arm, I think I did one on my left, I can't remember. I'm lonely :(

[Zan0ra]

Ash please stop.

[SirRawrsalot]

over the days i cut i think my total is around 9 on my right arm 11 on my left arm 4 on my right leg 13 on my left leg and 2 on my stomach.

stomachs were shallow, the rest were deepish. I'd love it if no one commented, normally I'd like help, but I don't feel too gracious so don't bother. I wanted this off my chest.