Question about Liking Someone

[Andy daMuzak mAn]

Okay so I have a friend who's 12 (he will be 13 this summer) and I'm 13. He doesnt know that I might be gay (I dont really know 100% yet either but I think so...I'm not out of the closet) but I really really like him. I'm wondering if I should tell him and find out if he likes me? Has anyone told someone like this? Do you think I should tell or is it to risky? I really don't want to come out to anyone but at the same time I really like him.

I'm just hoping he likes me to but I dont know what to do. :confused:

[xmojox]

Okay so I have a friend who's 12 (he will be 13 this summer) and I'm 13. He doesnt know that I might be gay (I dont really know 100% yet either but I think so...I'm not out of the closet) but I really really like him. I'm wondering if I should tell him and find out if he likes me? Has anyone told someone like this? Do you think I should tell or is it to risky? I really don't want to come out to anyone but at the same time I really like him.

I'm just hoping he likes me to but I dont know what to do. :confused:

If you had to guess, would you say he likes you?

[teen.jpg]

I've been in this situation three times in a row. Really, tell him you might be gay and see his reaction to it. If he's accepting, then tell him your feelings.

[Haydenn3]

I would wait till you are 100% or atleast come out Bi first and if he is ok with it tell him you like him but dont worry you dont want to ruin the friendship

[Andy daMuzak mAn]

If you had to guess, would you say he likes you?

Sometimes I think so but I'm not sure if thats just in my head but then again we've been best friends for a long time and even experimented one time just touching nothing serious and that was 2 years ago... so I'm not really sure. I have tried to say so many times but way to scared he's not and will get really pissed and maybe tell other people. I dont know if that makes sense. So confused. :(

[xmojox]

Sometimes I think so but I'm not sure if thats just in my head but then again we've been best friends for a long time and even experimented one time just touching nothing serious and that was 2 years ago... so I'm not really sure. I have tried to say so many times but way to scared he's not and will get really pissed and maybe tell other people. I dont know if that makes sense. So confused. :(

Yeah it makes sense :) this stuff can get realllllly confusing i know! Do you trust him not to do anything that would hurt you?

[Meh Guy]

My advice would be to tell him that you you like him and that you might be gay. Don't say you like him in that way and gauge his response. If he is a good friend, even if he doesn't want that kind of thing he'll still like you

[Andy daMuzak mAn]

Yeah it makes sense :) this stuff can get realllllly confusing i know! Do you trust him not to do anything that would hurt you?

I trust him with everything and anything but I never know how anyone will act when you say your gay, even him. :( Its like never come up before so its hard to say. Arghhhh...

Do you think since we experimented before thats a good sign?

I think maybe I will ask him how he feels about other gay people and see what he does but its not like hes ever freaked out about them before but I dont know...maybe thats dumb

[xmojox]

I trust him with everything and anything but I never know how anyone will act when you say your gay, even him. :( Its like never come up before so its hard to say. Arghhhh...

Do you think since we experimented before thats a good sign?

I think maybe I will ask him how he feels about other gay people and see what he does but its not like hes ever freaked out about them before but I dont know...maybe thats dumb

It's good you trust him like that and yeah it's scary when you like someone and don't know if they'd freak out if you told them.

It's maybe a good sign that you messed around some. For sure it's not a bad sign :) have you ever talked about it?

If he's never freaked out about gay people before it's probably safe that he won't if you tell him. I think your plan is a pretty good one. Just kinda start slow and see what he says.

Thanks for friend requesting me :D

[paulw]

I would honestly start with seeing how he is about gay people and then moving on to "can i talk to you about something... how would you feel if i told you i think i might be gay", but not bring up your feelings for him, at least for a while.

I dont want to sound like i'm being harsh but obviously if you just look at percentages, its very possible he is just one of those guys who has experimented at some point but then turns out to be straight. The risk is that if he is, some straight guys justify experimenting to themselves like "its only experimenting so it isn't gay" and then if you suggest right away it might have meant more to you because you like him like that theres a risk he thinks .... omg you weren't experimenting you were.... deliberately gaying on me (or something lol), as though you somehow weren't honest about your motives (not saying its true just that its weird how some guys can be).

Now hopefully not and he will probably be cool either way cos he is your friend, but i would go easy at first just for safety.

Of course if you tell him but dont mention how much you like him, and he is okay with it, that gives u an excuse to flirt with him a bit after a while (once you know your friendship is still solid) .... dont forget he might not be sure about himself either yet and might be very cautius. But then you can flirt and see how much he lets you get away with, and if he doesnt mind, youre all good, and if he resists you can laugh it off because youre still friends so that way its not risky and u still have yr friendship either way.

[Andy daMuzak mAn]

theres a risk he thinks .... omg you weren't experimenting you were.... deliberately gaying on me (or something lol), as though you somehow weren't honest about your motives (not saying its true just that its weird how some guys can be).

yeah I guess you all are right. thanks for listening.

Sorry one more question but is it really wrong and bad to masterbate thinking about your best friend? I mean I do all the time but feel bad like after because its like a friend. What do you think? :confused:

[xmojox]

yeah I guess you all are right. thanks for listening.

Sorry one more question but is it really wrong and bad to masterbate thinking about your best friend? I mean I do all the time but feel bad like after because its like a friend. What do you think? :confused:

It's ok to masturbate thinkin about anyone you wanna think about. It's your fantasy :)

[paulw]

Hmmm probably a lot more healthy and normal than masturbating about someone you don't like :D

I think mostly you don't get to choose who you like anyway, so, i wouldnt worry too much. If youre enjoying it and it's not risking hurting your friendship, its probably okay. Its probably much worse to beat yourself up about it.... i dont think any amount of telling yourself not to is going to make you not want to :)

I think the only time theres a risk is if you get too emotionally attached to the idea of them and then they dont feel the same way and you start to feel bad about it all, so just remember to keep things in perspective. Fantasies and realites can be very different. But you seem like a smart guy and youre asking thoughtful questions so i would say you have a good level of maturity about it.

[Andy daMuzak mAn]

But you seem like a smart guy.

Thanks :yeah: :rolleyes:

[Second Chance]

yeah I guess you all are right. thanks for listening.

Sorry one more question but is it really wrong and bad to masterbate thinking about your best friend? I mean I do all the time but feel bad like after because its like a friend. What do you think? :confused:

I would be careful about coming out unless where you live, the school you attend, and your other friends are all right with gay people. I am not saying you shouldn't have your feelings and express them, but just be careful if you are in a place that is not exactly gay friendly. For example, if you live in San Francisco, then coming out as gay is not a big deal; if you are somewhere in the Bible Belt in one of those Southern STates where they'll pray the gay out of you, then coming out in such a place is a really, really bad idea. Without knowing about the kind of place where you live it is kind of tough to tell you exactly what to do.

Also, you need to look at your family most especially your parents and your siblings. If they are all supportive, then coming out is fine; if they're not, then I would hold off on coming out for a while.

I agree with the person above who said that all because you experimented with your friend doesn't make him gay. Of course, my view is that he is bi-curious if you guys have experimented a bunch of times and he enjoyed it. I guess you could see how your friend is like by asking him about how he feels about gays. If he goes off the deep end, then I would not come out to him; if he is positive, then you have nothing to loose by letting him know as long as he can keep quiet about it.

Since you're 13 you'll masturbate to anything, and since you really like your friend a lot I don't see any harm in masturbating to him. It is not like your doing anything wrong because you like him and his body. As long as you don't do anything sexual with him against his will, then masturbating to him is fine especially if that gives you relief.

[ChrisA1998]

Do you think I should tell or is it to risky? I really don't want to come out to anyone but at the same time I really like him.

why would you want to tell this to this guy in particular rather than anopther friend ?

[paulw]

why would you want to tell this to this guy in particular rather than anopther friend ?

Unless i've misunderstood, Andy's point was that he likes likes this friend i.e. is attracted to him. It's classic "boy meets boy, boy gets a crush on boy, boy wonders if boy will go crazy and run for the hills if he tells him"....

:)

[ChrisA1998]

Unless i've misunderstood, Andy's point was that he likes likes this friend i.e. is attracted to him. It's classic "boy meets boy, boy gets a crush on boy, boy wonders if boy will go crazy and run for the hills if he tells him"....

:)

that was my point ;-)

now Andy must find how his friends feels back toward him