Bike Sex?! *did he say that?* yes I did!

[Dante]

Bike sex man placed on probation



A man caught trying to have sex with his bicycle has been sentenced to three years on probation.


Robert Stewart, 51, admitted a sexually aggravated breach of the peace by conducting himself in a disorderly manner and simulating sex.
Sheriff Colin Miller also placed Stewart on the Sex Offenders Register for three years.
Mr Stewart was caught in the act with his bicycle by cleaners in his bedroom at the Aberley House Hostel in Ayr.
Gail Davidson, prosecuting, told Ayr Sheriff Court: "They knocked on the door several times and there was no reply.
"They used a master key to unlock the door and they then observed the accused wearing only a white t-shirt, naked from the waist down.
"The accused was holding the bike and moving his hips back and forth as if to simulate sex."
Both cleaners, who were "extremely shocked", told the hostel manager who called police.
Sheriff Colin Miller told Stewart: "In almost four decades in the law I thought I had come across every perversion known to mankind, but this is a new one on me. I have never heard of a 'cycle-sexualist'."
Stewart had denied the offence, claiming it was caused by a misunderstanding after he had too much to drink.
The bachelor had been living in the hostel since October 2006 after moving from his council house in Girvan. He now lives in Ayr.

[Bobby]

That's disturbing - very disturbing.

[DouggyO.o]

hella bizzar fetish

[Malcolm Tucker]

Creepy

[Archduke Robert of France]

That's pretty gross.

[Sugaree]

That's disturbing - very disturbing.

A little too disturbing!

[Aηdy]

How the hell is it an offence?

[Gumleaf]

i have to say that i found that funny. but how can that be illegal? he was doing it in the privacy of his own room!

[Sugaree]

Well yeah I would not find that an offense but if he had been regiestered a Sex offender than you couldn't jail him because the bike was not an type of living thing

[Gumleaf]

Well yeah I would not find that an offense but if he had been regiestered a Sex offender than you couldn't jail him because the bike was not an type of living thing

that would be strange, being charged with rape for having sex with a bike.

[Underground_Network]

Interesting... Very, very, very interesting... :/

[Maverick]

Ok that's just ridiculous, Its a non-living object.

[Hauptmann Kauffman]

Thats pretty gross, but why probation? Its his private life...

[ArtistInNeed]

how do u have sex with a bike?

[Hauptmann Kauffman]

use your imagination, you'll figure it out... :/

[sage of craze]

Erm... RAPE

[RaisingSand]

Ewww ... and ow. :P

[Hyper]

Rofl!!!

[The Resurrected One]

The funniest part was that he was arrested.

[Hyper]

No the funniest thing is that he is a sex offender!!

[Serenity]

Ok that's just ridiculous, Its a non-living object.

Seriously, there are all kinds of sex toys in the world- his just happens to be a bicycle. Whatever, leave him to his freaky perverted fantasies but for crying out loud don't arrest him for it...

[Sugaree]

Well true.

It really wouldn't be that bad. I mean the bike isn't even a living object so it wouldn't be a sexual offense.

Not if this guy was listed as a sexual offender him there would still be no reason to arrest him forhaving sex with a bike.

[angryhalfdemon]

JEEEEZZE!!! never mind tha fact that he got arrested for it... question why he would resort to using a BIKE!!!!! holy cripes, seriously, I mean, I don't know about the rest of you guys, but I'd be scared of putting such an important part of myself near all of that metal and gears. If something got caught... cripes, I'm getting pains just thinking about it!

[Elscire]

wow....just for that he is Branded a sex offender because of raping a bike

[Sugaree]

that would be strange, being charged with rape for having sex with a bike.

Well yeah it would sound weird

Can you imagine the judge if he was sentenced?

Judge: "You are sentenced to 3 years in jail"
Offender: "What?! It was a fickin' bike!"
Judge: "I don't care your goin' to jail!"

Offender: "Will it be easier to say that the bike wanted me to do it?"
Judge: "hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm..........No. The ruling will stay the same"

[thesphinx]

"Wow" , I think that sums it up.

[Sugaree]

Yeah most of it

[Dante]

im wondering if its because he did it at a hostel? like i dont get it.

[dushanbe4]

Completely messed up. Wait, did he use any lube, or, what?

[Serenity]

I seriously doubt they're going to release his specific techniques to the public.

[Maverick]

Ah that's too bad I was kinda interested in trying it out for myself... :P

[Serenity]

LULZ Ant :P